Worst, most groan-inducing puns?

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husenki

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Apr 4, 2009
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Did you hear about the terrorist who tried to blow up a bus? he burned his mouth on the exhaust.

Or how about the cross eyed teacher? She couldnt control her pupils.
 

Xeros

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Aug 13, 2008
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http://21.media.tumblr.com/dkcgoDKQMktz2aymAfUW3JMCo1_500.jpg
These bloody things...
 

Mayonegg

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Mar 29, 2009
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I'm loving this thread, particularly all the swine flu ones. But it's worth remembering that puns are one of the highest forms of humour when implemented correctly. The problem with bad puns (which I still love) are that they're just said with little to no context.

I'll take Airplane as an example. Some reporters are in the flight tower and have just finished asked some stressful questions to the staff. Wrapping up, one says "C'mon boys, let's take some pictures." They then proceed to casually remove all the paintings hanging on the walls and then leave. Brilliance.

Of course after seeing Police Squad the orginal series, the one that's really in my head isn't a pun, but a very dry, dead pan line (my personal favourite type of humour). The police, having just told a lonely woman that her husband is dead, are watching her cry. To console her, one police officer says, "I'm sorry Mrs. Johnson. We would have come earlier but your husband wasn't dead then."
 

T-Bone24

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Dec 29, 2008
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I was at geography and my teacher told me we'd be learning about some gneiss schist (two kinds of rock).

It was agonizing, if only there was a tumbleweed.
 

SimuLord

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Aug 20, 2008
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A couple of Italian-American tourists went into a gift shop and pointed at one of the garments and said "What's-a that?" and the clerk said "Sarong." The tourists said "I dunno, looks a-right to me!"
 

Shade Jackrabbit

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Aug 3, 2008
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Why are frogs so good at building boats? Because they have lots of ribets. (Ribets, rivets? Get it? I'm awful.)

Why do people not bring lizards on hikes? Because they are always dragon behind. (Dragon, draggin'? I'm really sorry about that one.)

What did the bartender ask the sad-looking horse? "Why the long face?"

What did the foreigner say when a Frisbee was flying toward an American's head? "Mallard!"

That's all I have tonight. I may have some more threenight.
 

Lexodus

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Apr 14, 2009
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Two fish in a tank. One says to the other, "How the fuck d'you drive this thing!?"

Have you seen? They've redesigned the guy from Operation. He's now obese! Well, I guess they're catering to a wider audience...

Catholic church's come out with a new low fat Communion wafer. It's called, "I can't believe it's not Jesus"