Worst vehicles in gaming

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Erttheking

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It's a Warthog that can only carry two people and has no gun.
 

CleverCover

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Nov 17, 2010
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The Mako was the best vehicle ever. I loved that thing. Now the Hammerhead. That thing needs to be rebuilt with all new blueprints.
 

skywolfblue

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Jul 17, 2011
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I liked the Mako and the Hammerhead.

Mongoose and the HL2 vehicles are pretty terrible yes.


I'll nominate the Drakes from World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lich King: The Oculus & Malygos. Oh the rage those fights generated on the WoW forums, oh the grief. I personally didn't think they were ~all~ that bad, but a lot of people thought they were the absolute worst.
 

Lugbzurg

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The Slick Star in Kirby Airide... I just don't get why it was built. It cannot make turns sharper than around the end of a football field, it has so much trouble stopping, it's just so... useless!
 

Yopaz

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Jun 3, 2009
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Strange that no-one has said it by now. Sail boats from Just Cause 2. It's slower than swimming for god's sake! When you get into one of those and you're far from land then you're pretty much screwed. Better to use a grappling hook parachute combo and try to get into another watercraft.

Also watercrafts tend to be generally crappy in all games.
 

Skoldpadda

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Jan 13, 2010
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It warms my heart to see so much Mako love in this thread. I really feared it would be the least popular. I loved that thing. I still consider Bioware's decision to scrap it altogether instead of fine-tuning it to be unforgiveable.

I also liked the Mongoose. Ok, it didn't have a gun, but it was hilarious to zip around honking during deathmatches.

I'm going for the helicopter in Flight Simulator 98. I gave it a shot, tried to take off, and two seconds later it was on its head.
 

redrefugee

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Dec 8, 2010
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The Helicopter from Earth Defence Force. All of the vehicles in that game had handling problems but the chopper was the worst.
 

imnot

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Apr 23, 2010
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Racecarlock said:
The tuk-tuk in just cause 2. The thing barely has enough horsepower to go up a 27 degree hill, and it's really slow. Unfortunately, it's also one of the most common vehicles. Fortunately, I have the grappling hook and parachute.
This, although I did gain some respect for it earlier when I used one to avoid a helicopter which was spraying bullets and rockets at me. Then it flipped off a bridge and plummeted into the ocean and it lost my respect again.
 

Exocet

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Dec 3, 2008
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I think I have to nominate a vehicle from a rather new game, Wargames: European Escalation.

It's an "upgrade" to an anti-air gun jeep, which is ok, but really nothing special in itself, for the price it costs.

Its name? The Strop 1

Let's go through it's failures!
-It can only go, in optimal conditions 200km on a single tank of gas. It may sound like a lot, but you have to divide it by 5 to get the actual performance. It is in fact the vehicle with the least autonomy in the game, all that with a rather large fuel tank, 500L, which is enormous for such a small and cheap vehicle.
It's not even very fast.

-Its armed with an inaccurate anti-air 30mm auto-cannon. It doesn't have enough range to hit helicopters using missiles or rockets. Even if it manages to get in range, it fires too slowly, and takes too long to start hitting the target before it either leaves, or destroy the strop 1.

-Its price is appalling: 40. With that kind of money, you can buy a much more efficient missile launching, faster vehicle with twice the range.

-Its armor? 1 in the front of the vehicle, 0 everywhere else. Infantry can hurt it by using only rifles.

-Its health pool? Barely more than an armed (armed, not armored) truck, for two and a half the price.

The worse part of this vehicle? Its successor is truly amazing. For 25% more money, you can get much more speed, 3 times more autonomy, an accurate missile launcher, a more accurate main gun, more hp.

If you see one of these vehicles on the battlefield, you know your opponent so so desperate/incompetent, you can win just by having a single infantryman walk up to his units and kill them using only a rolled up newspaper.
 

teqrevisited

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The boats in Battlefield 2 & 3. Most of the time all they do is make you a bigger target.

Blackhawks in BF2. Getting into the air in one instantly attracts seven billion (Actual number may vary) tv missiles to your location.
 

GiglameshSoulEater

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Jun 30, 2010
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i remember the vehicles in Jak 3 where resoundingly rubbish.
But to be honest, it seems 80% of helicopters ever seen i na game get shot down, with at least 70% of those going into a tailspin before crashing/exploding/explocrashing.
 
Jan 29, 2009
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Slayer_2 said:
The Mako was actually pretty good, I thought, it could climb up an 80 degree incline, so pretty decent for accessibility. The weapons sucked, it was slow, and it weighed about 10 kilos, but it could climb Everest.

Some of the worst vehicles of all time were in Saints Row 2, they handle like boxes that magically accelerate from 0-100 in 2 seconds, and brake in half that.
Back in the Desert Combat mod for 1942, helicopters were made of awesome. No hand holding; they was tough as balls to fly, but they were maneuverable, fast, and deadly against ground targets.
 

saintdane05

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endtherapture said:


I hated this PoS.

THANK YOU! I was about to post that. Stupid bouncing. And flipping. And don't even get me started on trying to go up ramps...
 

Jmp_man

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Apr 24, 2011
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Cpu46 said:
The Mongoose is an excelent vehicle. Sure everything you said about it's attributes was right but you left out the fact that nobody can hit you if you drive it the right way. It is an awesome flag grab vehicle and can out menuver almost anything in the game. I have taken down scorpion tanks with that little vehicle (and a buddy) simply because the tank couldn't get a good hit in on me, we didn't even have a power weapon like rockets or splazer, we had assault rifles and grenades. The wraith kill count I have with it is astronomical.
O RLY SIR? (Sorry)

This is Halo right? Then I believe that the forklift would like to have a word with you... of course I guess you could say that it doesn't really count as a "Useful" vehicle that's bad per say, more like a "Joke" vehicle that's intentionally bad.

On another note I want to stretch the meaning of "vehicle" a bit my definition of vehicle is any mode of transportation that is ride-able. I would have to say that the worst "vehicle" I have ever used in any game would be the koopa shell from Super Mario 64 (again stretch). Considering the game doesn't give you a lot of opportunities to practice with it and the fact that it has very slippery controls and multiply that by the fact that it moves forward on its own PLUS crashing into ONE thing will throw you off it's pretty crazy (and again... its a stretch)

Edit:

Lugbzurg said:
The Slick Star in Kirby Airide... I just don't get why it was built. It cannot make turns sharper than around the end of a football field, it has so much trouble stopping, it's just so... useless!
If you want to talk about turning don't hate on the Slick Star (It's my favorite). It can take corners nicely and get a full boost as well if you plan the turn ahead of time. You should be yelling at the Formula Star though that thing can turn 5deg. left or right in about 10 minutes (minimum). Also why would you want to STOP in a racing game?
 

Razoack

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Jan 26, 2012
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I can see both sides to the Mako viewpoint. Personally, it was very awkward to control.

Helicopters + planes in BF3. because im bad at the game.
 

RA92

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Jan 1, 2011
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Look, it's a fucking fact that the ending of ME3 sucked because you couldn't make the final charge in a Mako, bouncing around like a fucking lunatic while the Reapers try to hit you.

I would've mowed that stupid Starchild with my baby.
 

scarecrow350

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Apr 4, 2010
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I would probably say any horse in any game ever
assassin's creed gets a special mention as being particularly crap
 

him over there

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Lugbzurg said:
The Slick Star in Kirby Airide... I just don't get why it was built. It cannot make turns sharper than around the end of a football field, it has so much trouble stopping, it's just so... useless!
Don't knock the slick star, you just probably haven't gotten over the learning curve. Though I agree that's irrelevant because it offers no benefits another star wouldn't, thus no reason to use it at all. The bulk star is far worse though.
 

GundamSentinel

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Aug 23, 2009
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Racecarlock said:
The tuk-tuk in just cause 2. The thing barely has enough horsepower to go up a 27 degree hill, and it's really slow. Unfortunately, it's also one of the most common vehicles. Fortunately, I have the grappling hook and parachute.
God yes. How many times have I been looking for a good fast vehicle, only to be confronted by a string of tuk-tuks slowly trundling my way.

Also, the chariot in Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones. Always crashing because a wheel nicked a wall. *sigh*

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