You can say one sentence and everyone on earth will hear it.

[Bestival]

"Damn, these are some sweaty balls..."

Just for the few people that will recognize the quote, and have a little chuckle at remembered mirth.

 

[William Ossiss]

As I sit here observing from afar, I notice how humanity is stagnant. Not a single one of you cares about anything that doesn't effect you or your life. Now die.

 

[Baldry]

"I [insert name here] am now your king and to prove my power I am talking to everyone just once. KNEEL BEFORE BALDRY!"

Then I'd make the world a better place, oh if only I was king.

 

[Curtisin]

"Behave.. Or else."

 

[White_Lama]

"IF YOU DON'T START PLAYING NICELY, I SWEAR I'LL TURN THIS PLANET AROUND!"

 

[Techsmart07]

"You must construct additional pylons."

Yes, I went there.

 

[Old Father Eternity]

"Will you stop the bloody fighting already you fucking morons, you have more important issues to work on than a giant dick waving competition."

Or the "I am very disappointed in you all"

 

[communist dwarf]

Just this.
http://i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/401/671/9dc.jpg

 

[2HF]

Your parents lied to you, you are not special, the rules apply to you just like everyone else.

 

[Dethenger]

"You had one chance."

 

[Jezzascmezza]

"I... DRINK... YOUR... MILKSHAKE!"
*Make exaggerated slurping sound*
"I DRINK IT UP!"

 

[Padwolf]

"THE LATINOS HAVE MUTATED!

And they are heating up the planet!

I would probably say "Well hello everyone.If I had something to say I guess that would make me a better public speaker."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"...And then I said, that's not a lawnmower, that's my wife!"

 

[ProtoChimp]

"Du, du, du du du du du dun dun dun dun dun dun DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!"

 

[Me55enger]

"Is... is this thing on?... Mike! You switch this thing on?! Oh Jesus man, Yes or No?! I got one shot at this and you cant remember if you switched it o...."

 

[Joby Baumann]

Ahem... Don't be a dick.

 

[RanD00M]

"Fuck me, oh fuck me, oh god yes harder, fuck me please."
I would of course be moaning and probably doing some other dirty things.

 

[gmaverick019_v1legacy]

"Avenged Sevenfold, Five Finger Death Punch, Shinedown, Seether and Three Days Grace are all awful and you should feel bad about supporting them."

hah jeez, hipster elitist much?

OT: probably something to get people to grow the fuck up

"

Everyone GET THE !@#$ ALONG, we are all human, so please, show come common courtesy to one another mother!@#$ers!!!

along these lines.

 

[Oly J]

[HEADING=2]"What is WRONG with you people?!"[/HEADING]

It is of course well known that careless talk costs lives, but the full scale of the problem is not always appreciated.

For, at the very moment that FalloutJack said this, a freak wormhole opened up in the fabric of the space-time continuum and carried his words far far back in time across almost infinite reaches of space to a distant Galaxy where strange and warlike beings were poised on the brink of frightful interstellar battle.

The two opposing leaders were meeting for the last time.

A dreadful silence fell across the conference table as the commander of the Vl'Hurgs, resplendent in his black jewelled battle shorts, gazed levelly at the the G'Gugvuntt leader squatting opposite him in a cloud of green sweet-smelling steam, and, with a million sleek and horribly beweaponed star cruisers poised to unleash electric death at his single word of command, challenged the vile creature to take back what it had said about his mother.

The creature stirred in his sickly broiling vapour, and at that very moment the words "What is WRONG with you people?!" drifted across the conference table. Unfortunately, in the Vl'Hurg tongue this was the most dreadful insult imaginable, and there was nothing for it but to wage terrible war for centuries.

Eventually of course, after their Galaxy had been decimated over a few thousand years, it was realized that the whole thing had been a ghastly mistake, and so the two opposing battle fleets settled their few remaining differences in order to launch a joint attack on our own Galaxy - now positively identified as the source of the offending remark.

For thousands more years the mighty ships tore across the empty wastes of space and finally dived screaming on to the first planet they came across - which happened to be the Earth - where due to a terrible miscalculation of scale the entire battle fleet was accidentally swallowed by a small dog.

Those who study the complex interplay of cause and effect in the history of the Universe say that this sort of thing is going on all the time, but that we are powerless to prevent it.

"It's just life," they say.

a Hitchhikers reference? well done sir, you win the internet,

I WAS going to go with "the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything is....42, but yours really took the wind out of my sales

so I'll go with

THIS IS THE VOICE OF THE MYSTERONS! WE KNOW THAT YOU CAN HEAR US, EARTH MEN!

either that or, "all your base are belong to us"

or maybe "I DEMAND THE ENTIRE CAST OF JERSEY SHORE BE SACRIFICED TO MY GLORY!!"