You get one wish, granted by Batman.

[hazabaza1]

Infinite wishes. Boom.
Hey, no limits, right?

He's the only man on the planet Superman has to fear.

...You really wanna risk pissing him off? Cause infinite requests, then hill start being a dick to you.

and I stress, you don't want Batman to be a dick to you.

Nah, I'll just ask for something like a magic teapot that can give me the wishes. He can do anything, and he only needs to get me the teapot. Simples!

 

[Dethenger]

I'd ask to be Robin.

 

[LobsterFeng]

I'd make him my butler.

 

[Fiz_The_Toaster]

Have him teach me how to make the best burrito humanly possible.

I bet it would be delicious. Mmmm.....

 

[SS2Dante]

I'd ask him to save his parents.

:O

 

[RoBi3.0]

I wish for him to successfully run for president of the United States.

So yeah, I'm combining the "fix all the corruption" thing with the crazy awesome that is BATMAN FOR PRESIDENT.

And I'm British, not American, so in the event that it turns out Batman's skillset doesn't extend well to politics (you can't punch red tape) I'll be watching at a safe distance of a couple thousand miles.

Whatever, The Goddamn Batman can punch all the red tap he wants who the fuck is going to stop him.

President Goddamn Batman would get shit done.


I am going to wish for President Batman as well as being trained to take his place in the streets of Gotham while he is on Capital Hill.

 

[kouriichi]

I believe i would say, "All your riches and b*tches", but my wife would get angry.
So i'll go with, "A billion dollars after tax". Yeah, that sounds about right.

 

[funnydude6556]

What do you ask of Batman? No catch-22s, no bullshit, You have the worlds greatest detective/martial arts expert/great superhero EVER at your disposal. No request is off limits (because we're assuming he has the entire DC Universe at his disposal.)

The only thing you can't do is till him to outright murder someone, or have him doing something that inadvertently causes death.

Me? I'd ask him to fix the economy. With all that money at his disposal he could create some great public works projects that would lead to employment.

I don't need a wish I know Batman so my wish has already come true.

 

[Lerasai]

If we're in the DC universe here then I'd ask him to take me under his wing! Working with Batman as a Batgirl or Robin? Even if I died horribly in the line of duty (or, more likely, a tragically hilarious batarang accident) I would've died living my childhood dream of fighting evil by moonlight, even if I win no love by daylight.

But, if Batman was like, "That is not happening. Pick something that doesn't involve me talking to you after this." I would definitely ask him for some money to spend on my education and my family.

And to commission a Batgirl costume as a consolation prize.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Batman? I want a billion dollars and Alfred for the day. You can resume doing that thing you do.

 

[VonKlaw]

I'd get him to teach me how to be Batman. Unless that counts as a Catch 22.

 

[Leemaster777]

Damn, this is hard. Because I've got two REALLY freaking good ones.

Wish 1: Teach me to be a crime-fighter like you. I mean, come on, who WOULDN'T want to be taught by the god damn Batman on how to kick ass?

Wish 2: Give me your gadgets. Utility belt? Check. Batarangs? Check. Grappling hook? Check. Batmobile? Double-check. Cause chicks dig the car.

The most awesome thing would be if I could wish for both of them in one wish.

 

[Marcus Kehoe]

To help win wonder woman's heart.

 

[CODE-D]

Can I have some money bro?

 

[Panorama]

Can i borrow a tenner?

 

[EHKOS]

OO! OO! I WANT TO BE TERRY! GIVE ME THE AWESOME SUIT! And disapprove of me in my ear via bluetooth! Or a Lamborghini, but that's only if he won't let me have the red and black awesomest suit evar.

 

[Elementary - Dear Watson]

Batman, huh?

Fix the whole damn corrupt system the world has now.

Just fix it. That's what I'd ask.

I like the way you say 'now' like it is a new thing...

OT: I would get him to Give me one of his motorbikes... I really need a new one, and his is the coolest in the world..!

 

[Vrach]

Find the guy responsible for rushing Civ5 - and punch him hard enough to make him see the curvature of the Earth.

 

[cswurt]

I'd ask him to get me Harley Quinn for Christmas.