You have a slave

Recommended Videos

CODE-D

New member
Feb 6, 2011
1,966
0
0
PsychicTaco115 said:
I would enslave a British orphan with a cockney accent.

He would do all the housework and errands, and if he ever talked back or tried to sing, I'd slap him.

Why? Because orphans are great comic material.
I really found that funny and pictured tobi from sweeney todd.
 

Sansha

There's a principle in business
Nov 16, 2008
1,726
0
0
I'd pick up my slave, take him to my place, show him to his quarters, give him clothes and let him keep any personal effects he has, tell him he'll be paid with food and somewhere to live, rewarded for exceptional work and will never be over-worked, be treated when sick, have access and contact with the outside world, and be educated if he wishes.

Then I'd take him to the foyer, pop off his collar and say "There's the door, you remember how to get to your room. It's your call." and go back to my other business.

Fuck slavery - I'd rather an employee and companion.
 

PsychicTaco115

I've Been Having These Weird Dreams Lately...
Legacy
Mar 17, 2012
5,950
14
43
Country
United States
CODE-D said:
PsychicTaco115 said:
I would enslave a British orphan with a cockney accent.

He would do all the housework and errands, and if he ever talked back or tried to sing, I'd slap him.

Why? Because orphans are great comic material.
I really found that funny and pictured tobi from sweeney todd.
Why thank you dear sir!

Really though, you can never go wrong with having an orphan as a slave

Because though I make him do the chores, I'm secretly training him to be like one of the greatest orphans of all time... BATMAN!
 

Lovely Mixture

New member
Jul 12, 2011
1,474
0
0
Human Slavery is wrong and immoral. That said, if this thread will allow non-human variants such as elves, I will take a female elf.

Don't look at me that way.


Discloser: In the case that Elves do exist, Lovely Mixture does not condone elf-rape, elf-slavery, or any form of elf abuse, and sincerely apologizes to any Elves he may have offended by this statement.
 

GameMaNiAC

New member
Sep 8, 2010
599
0
0
Grey Day for Elcia said:
I have one. I call him Boyfriend. He is very tentative.
That made me laugh. Epic post is epic.

OT: This person. [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/profiles/view] I've heard they make excellent servants, especially when you give them an occasional smack every now and then.
 

EclipseoftheDarkSun

New member
Sep 11, 2009
230
0
0
Pyro Paul said:
Twilight_guy said:
No one. Slavery is a travesty. That's like saying I get one free murder. The idea is awful.
no it isn't.
slavery in and of itself is not bad...
mostly because slavery can be very common to familial bonds or deep friendships in which individuals may be compelled to do things against their will for irrational reasons.

what has painted an ugly picture of slavery is the dehumanization of slaves by those whom are in a superior position of power.
Obviously there is a continuum of slavery, but I don't think most people would include the bonds that form between friends and family in the definition, unless they become severely disfunctional.

Slavery is typically the act of forcing someone to do something against their interests/their will for the benefit of others.

I don't think it's helpful to expand the definition of slavery beyond the normal use of the term, since some people might jump to the wrong conclusion.

Anyway, yes it's true, you can make pretty much anything humorous with the right touch of exaggeration and yes some of us have taken the spirit of the thread perhaps a little seriously.
 

devilofthemist

New member
Feb 13, 2012
82
0
0
either Ikaros or nymph from heaven's lost property for several reasons
1) they actually enjoy having masters so i don't need to feel morally guilty
2) ikaros is a fucking killing machine and nymph can hack anything
3) well banging hot
 

StormShaun

The Basement has been unleashed!
Feb 1, 2009
6,948
0
0
*looks above and shrugs* I would do the only thing I would think it right which would be to set the slave free (Geoff from Rooster Teeth after I play games with him and have fun...which he will like with his freewill) and then I will hunt the people that organized this and bring them to justice.

Easy enough.

Captcha: "graveyard shift" Yeah someone will have to do that soon if I find them slavers.
 

Spectral Dragon

New member
Jun 14, 2011
283
0
0
GameMaNiAC said:
Grey Day for Elcia said:
I have one. I call him Boyfriend. He is very tentative.
That made me laugh. Epic post is epic.

OT: This person. [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/profiles/view] I've heard they make excellent servants, especially when you give them an occasional smack every now and then.
Damn it, you beat me to it! I wanted that wanker to be my slave! Fight to the death or share?

I'll also join the crowd of people going that it's not okay to have a non-consensual slave... With the exception of the sexy beast GameMaNiAC mentioned. Rowr.
 

Shemming

New member
Jun 12, 2010
783
0
0
Im normally the slave...wait wrong answer. I would pick, some black bely master style eprson, andamke him teach me to be batman. Then he can go.
 

AVATAR_RAGE

New member
May 28, 2009
1,120
0
0
the clockmaker said:
...no one, slavery is a very bad thing and it is wrong to own one.

Did I miss the poitn whre we forgot that, can we check on that?
Ditto, I know this thread is suppose to light hearted but I find it sickening.
 

Smeatza

New member
Dec 12, 2011
934
0
0
AVATAR_RAGE said:
Ditto, I know this thread is suppose to light hearted but I find it sickening.
I would have you as my slave, and in my dungeon you would learn that you have been using the word sickening very lightly.

In all seriousness I don't think posting in this thread = advocating slavery. And to get all high and mighty over humour suggests there is a stick that needs removing from a certain somewhere.

Anyway back OT: I would have Juliette Lewis as my slave as better she be a slave to me than the church of scientology.
 

Robert Ewing

New member
Mar 2, 2011
1,977
0
0
Ehh, slaves aren't really my thing... I prefer people to do what they will, willfully. But I suppose if I had to pick, Karen Gillan. Awwwwwhhhhh yeaaaaaahhhh...
 

ThePenguinKnight

New member
Mar 30, 2012
893
0
0
UncleUlty said:
If they have to be real, then Ellen Page, because damn that's why.


If not then Chie Satonaka, because she'd be a great bodyguard.
I've noticed in some of your previous posts that you too, are a huge Chie fan. I'd like to bring this glorious discovery to your attention http://www.1999.co.jp/eng/10178436

OT: I'd enslave Glenn Beck or Shirley Phelps, You really don't want to know what horrific things I'd have them do to themselves. I'd probably have to flea the country afterwards.
 

Zack Alklazaris

New member
Oct 6, 2011
1,938
0
0
Brian Moynihan

He is the CEO of Bank of America.

I would then rent him out to anyone who wants to beat the crap out of him.
 
Feb 28, 2008
689
0
0
Would keep actor Chris Evans for a while. Just to have him doing things around the house shirtless. I mean, this body:
... and he's even fitter in Captain America ... Meanwhile I would beg him to marry me.

captcha: 'forbidden fruit' ... This thing is endowed with mystical powers I swear ...