I got a tactical nuke of fail right here baby:
A My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic based FPS where you get to play as Twilight Sparkle armed with a jizz cannon & the ponies come at you plot first. The jizz cannon only works 1/100th of the time & if they close, you get to watch a first-person animation of yourself getting it in the bum & other bodily holes which lasts for a literal minute. Did I mention it's cover-based where cover works 2% of the time & doesn't actually do anything? Or the fact that the actual movement registers as well as Superman 64's flight controls?
Equestria has been replaced with gray/brown industrial areas so generic you can smell the paint used to make it look better, and you totally feel the complete linearity with no way around it or anything, just one giant corridor with enemies that spawn outta nowhere & charge bum first at your jizz cannon! But you'll never see them because the graphics chug like a frat boy at a party & you'll be getting rammed often since the ponies often look like the environment!
The soundtrack is Waking The Cadaver, Justin Bieber, Selena Gomez, Backstreet Boys, Vanilla Ice, more Justin Bieber, N'Sync, & any other teen starlet out!
Did I mention multiplayer that works for .0000000000056 of a second filled to the brim with pedophiles, ragers, trolls, elitist bastards, more pedophiles, and the crowd who think Action 52 is the best thing ever!