You have to make the Worst game ever

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captaincabbage

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Apr 8, 2010
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Numachuka said:
mr.hotandspicy said:
You are Justin Bieber. Armed with a water pistol. You must work your way through the disney studios firing at your pre-teen fangirls. The soundtrack is a loop of Justin Bieber songs.
I would sooner gauge out my ears with a spoon than have to listen to the soundtrack that game.
*Hands you a spoon* Don't forget to give it back after you're done, it's my turn next.
 

vanthebaron

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Sep 16, 2010
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ProfessorLayton said:
You know that mission in Dead Space where you had to shoot the asteroids that are coming at the ship? Turn it into a full game.
http://www.play.vg/games/4-Asteroids.html
knock your self out, its already been done

I'd remake pong and make out a dumb as shit story to go along with it.
 

Kyoufuu

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Mar 12, 2009
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Graphics of Minecraft, camera control of *insert disney game here*, difficulty of Castlevania (for NES), learning curve of DotA, community of /b/, cutscenes the length of MGS, complete lack of Chosen One Syndrome of WoW, penalty for death of RuneScape, broken optimisation of D&D 3.5 (looking at you, Pun-Pun), development time of Duke Nukem Forever.
 

junkmanuk

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Apr 7, 2009
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It has to be playable, but shit? I'm immediately thinking of Consipracy: Weapons of Mass Destruction [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLGn5Xuqb-8]

Ok, my game would be 'Traffic Warden Wars'. You are a traffic warden and you have to ticket as many cars while avoiding enraged motorists. Your scoring is handled by an 'asshole' gauge and you can power up at parking meters... As an extra dimension, at the end of each stage would be a bureaucracy stage where you have to meticulously type in all the ticket details in triplicate. Of course, if you forgot to log the ticket during the main stage using your handy clipboard control panel you will have to 'fudge' the results - which gives the risk of disciplinary action and eventually resulting in losing your 'badge'.

Yeahh... that'll do it. Can't wait for Yahtzee to review that game...
 

Ch@Z

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Oct 18, 2009
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Set in the age of enlightenment where you need to reload for 30 seconds after one shot.
 

shadyh8er

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Apr 28, 2010
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You play as yourself, and you have to kill all your childhood idols. Whoever they are. And the final boss is Chuck Norris.
 

zaiggs

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Sep 18, 2010
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A game where you play as the cities last hope, an 80 ear old retired police officer with cataracts, and must ride the city of criminals. Parts of the screen will be completely black (because of the cataracts) and the rest will be very dim in the range of gray to black, otherwise completely unlit. Only the outlines of enemies will be visible so you will have to tell the shape of the environment by where enemies are. Fortunately, enemies infinite spawn.

The twist at the end of the game is that you don't have cataracts, you are clinically insane and have been hallucinating, killing large numbers of innocent people for the cities gangs.
 

TephlonPrice

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Dec 24, 2011
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I got a tactical nuke of fail right here baby:

A My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic based FPS where you get to play as Twilight Sparkle armed with a jizz cannon & the ponies come at you plot first. The jizz cannon only works 1/100th of the time & if they close, you get to watch a first-person animation of yourself getting it in the bum & other bodily holes which lasts for a literal minute. Did I mention it's cover-based where cover works 2% of the time & doesn't actually do anything? Or the fact that the actual movement registers as well as Superman 64's flight controls?

Equestria has been replaced with gray/brown industrial areas so generic you can smell the paint used to make it look better, and you totally feel the complete linearity with no way around it or anything, just one giant corridor with enemies that spawn outta nowhere & charge bum first at your jizz cannon! But you'll never see them because the graphics chug like a frat boy at a party & you'll be getting rammed often since the ponies often look like the environment!

The soundtrack is Waking The Cadaver, Justin Bieber, Selena Gomez, Backstreet Boys, Vanilla Ice, more Justin Bieber, N'Sync, & any other teen starlet out!

Did I mention multiplayer that works for .0000000000056 of a second filled to the brim with pedophiles, ragers, trolls, elitist bastards, more pedophiles, and the crowd who think Action 52 is the best thing ever!
 

Lunar Templar

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Sep 20, 2009
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Twilight: Bella's Journey

pretty much you play as Belle the whole time, you get mostly melee attacks, consisting of slapping, and the sound track would consist ONLY of Justin Bieber songs and would feature an Easter egg with Edward and Barney the dinosaur dancing and singing, and by Easter egg i mean you can't fucking miss it :D
 

Groxnax

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Apr 16, 2009
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E.T. FPS... and you're E.T.

IN 3D and STEREO.

And it plays like that horrible Superman 64 game.

The music is played by a band that got really drunk off of moonshine and the person that does the sound effects got confused and mixed them all up.

Oh, and your only weapon is the finger light,
 

TheRundownRabbit

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Aug 27, 2009
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Robocop the Game...oh wait a second.

Hows about a game where...hows about I promise a really good game, but I dont release it for 13 years and it ends up being mediocre...pretty terrible right :p
 

Vegosiux

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May 18, 2011
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So, if "Worst game ever that has to be an FPS" then I assume it's meant that the FPS gang consider it "worst game ever", because those of us who do not like FPS games kinda believe FPS games aren't too good to begin with.

Now that I've Occam'd the task down a little it became rather simple. Before you can fire, you need to solve a puzzle. A random puzzle, from those plumbing ones to tile swapping ones. And that needs to be done for every bullet. And you can be shot while solving, too.

Good luck with your assault rifles and SMG's.

Then again, let's jazz it up a little. The more punch a shot packs, the harder the puzzle. So the ground is evened out a little between the snipers and the dakka dakka crowd.