You wake up in a horror movie. What do you do?

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Daverson

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Nov 17, 2009
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I don't mean to blow my own trumpet, but if I'm in a horror movie, then I'm probably going to be the killer. Can I just take this opportunity to say I look forward to working with all of you. =)

I suppose if I get stuck in one of the roles that wouldn't suit me, guess I'd just bugger off. I could probably escape easily enough. The trick is not to get too involved, because then you run the risk of becoming a character, and that drastically reduces your chances of surviving. Keep in the realm of the extras my friend, this isn't Star Trek, you're not important enough for money to be spent on an on-screen death! =)
 

meticadpa

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Jul 8, 2010
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Well, I've seen enough horror movies, so I'd know how it works.

I wouldn't be on my own, for anything. I'd probably head to a pub or something like that.
 

ramboondiea

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Oct 11, 2010
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first put kettle on, im useless without a brew in me

well id first survey my surroundings to figure out what kind of movie im in.

after establishing that i go to my book shelves and find the appropriate survival guide (not joking, i have like 25)

skim through the prep pages and then go on my way surviving and all that.
 

ShadowKatt

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Mar 19, 2009
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I don't know, but I'll tell you what I WON'T be doing. I will not:

-go through that door
-go to sleep
-go outside
-stay inside
-take a bath
-watch television
-or say whatever's happened, it can't get any worse.
 

Nicos Amblecrown

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Feb 23, 2010
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Reinstall my man-hymen and thank God I'm not black?

John Marcone said:
First off. Not be black...
That would ensure I died before I could do anything else.
Damn! Ninja'd by a few seconds :D
 

TonyVonTonyus

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Dec 4, 2010
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1)Stay away from minorities, they die, just listen to Scary Movie
2)Get hunting rifle
3)Get out of my empty house in favour of the heavily populated area slightly to my left
4)Recreate scenes from other, better movies
4)a)Act like the killer
4)b)If it's an alternate reality where other movies exist as well that means I'm in a Biker gangs, so I'd call up some of them.
4)c)Act like John Wayne.

 

Wierdguy

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Feb 16, 2011
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I dunno... call the ghostbusters? Im in the movie world aint I? Seems like the most logical solution.
 

bubba145

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Jan 4, 2010
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step one figure what genere of horror i am in.
step two arm self
step three better arm self (gun store)
step four AIM FOR THE HEAD
step five decap enemy
step six tear our heart of enemy
step seven burn heart first
step eight burn head
step nine burn body
step ten start whistling Dixie
ten steps to survive a horror movie
 

Canadamus Prime

Robot in Disguise
Jun 17, 2009
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Well I'll tell you what I wouldn't do. I wouldn't run around screaming like an idiot, letting the serial killer know exactly where I am. No, I'd probably grab a nice blunt object with which I could bash the serial killer in the head.

EDIT: Speaking of which, why is it no one in these movies ever thinks of kicking the serial killer in the balls? Speaking as a man, it's no secret that that's a man's weak spot. It's like the big glowing eye of the Gohma. I mean come on, most girls figured this out around kindergarten, do they suddenly forget when a serial killer shows up?
 

Drake_Dercon

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Sep 13, 2010
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Head to the police station (which will be close to my house), a small convenience store or a local bar. It must be well-lit.

Bring guns, ammo and a rechargeable flashlight that I charged before leaving.

Make sure everyone in the building is in my sight at all times.

Knives
Lighter
Supplies
A secondary crank flashlight
A flashlight that takes batteries
Plenty of batteries
Three more loveable and three more hated characters tan me, including an old man that's going to retire soon and two love interests, one of which wants to have sex, but I don't want and the other a quarrelling friend (and neither of us know how we truly feel, or plan to have sex before the end)
Padlocks, keeping keys and several copies
Some explosives
Cellphone that is fully charged
Tablet so that I an look disinterested while playing idly, actually prepared with a gun

Note that the bathrooms are not safe.

Always leave the group with TWO buddies and everyone holds hands. I don't care how stupid you feel.
 

x-machina

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Sep 14, 2010
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Well since only attractive women can survive I'm pretty much fucked, regardless of what I do.