your best joke

[Evilmonkeysniper0182]

im sorry for the best boob joke thread, didnt know id offend so many people

so heres a best joke thread, nothing to do with games or anything, just a bit of fun

 

[SqueeFactor]

do you like fishsticks?

 

[ZeroMachine]

do you like fishsticks?

What are you, a gay fish? XD

 

[SqueeFactor]

all i said was i like fishsticks. i like to put fishsticks, in my mouth.

 

[CosmicGrenade]

Q. What do you call an empty seat of a bus full of lawyers going over a cliff?

A. A waste

and my BEST EVER JOKE

Q. What smells like blue paint but is red?

Spoiler

A. Red Paint

 

[SqueeFactor]

One of my favs- (I'm not sexist, i'm a dude)

And so God created the Garden of Eden, and in it put woman as he saw fit. Before he left he asked her "My child, I have created you in my image. Is there anything you may object to?" She said "Well yes, Lord. Why have you given me three breasts? I am made to raise but two children at a time, not entire litters." "You speak well, for I have made thee with wisdom. As you wish." There was a rush of wind and a flash, and woman was made with two breasts. She looked up and saw God holding the surplus breast in his hand. "But Lord, what are you going to do with that useless boob?"

And so man was created.

 

[Kuliani]

One of my favs- (I'm not sexist, i'm a dude)

And so God created the Garden of Eden, and in it put woman as he saw fit. Before he left he asked her "My child, I have created you in my image. Is there anything you may object to?" She said "Well yes, Lord. Why have you given me three breasts? I am made to raise but two children at a time, not entire litters." "You speak well, for I have made thee with wisdom. As you wish." There was a rush of wind and a flash, and woman was made with two breasts. She looked up and saw God holding the surplus breast in his hand. "But Lord, what are you going to do with that useless boob?"
And so man was created.

That one's great! I'm gonna forward that to my wife

 

[Helmet]

Alright, I've got to give the story behind the first time I heard this joke before I tell it.

When I was 17, I signed up on my brother's cell phone plan and got my own. He told me to leave it on, even at school, and if something important happened (accident, something with the family, etc...) he would call several times so I know to pick it up.

About three weeks after I get my phone, I'm sitting in my History class when my phone rings. My brother. I ignore the call. He calls three more times, and I pick up on the fourth. As soon as I picked up my phone, I knew I had detention but I figured something bad had happened to make him call me.

Instead he had a joke. Here it is.

"A woman walks into a bar and orders a double entendre. The bartender give it to her."

 

[Lullabye]

why is diahrea genetic?*

Spoiler

because it runs in your jeans
*i know its not genetic

dont judge me.

 

[thiosk]

i l

why is diahrea genetic?*

Spoiler

because it runs in your jeans
*i know its not genetic

dont judge me.

i love this.

love.

 

[Lullabye]

A man walks into a bar and tells the bartender to line up 6 tequila shots.
BT: "Having a bad day or something?"
Guy: "No, I'm actually celebrating!"
BT: "Oh, what are ya celebrating?"
Guy: *gulps down the first shot*"ahh....first blowjob t'day"
BT: "Well, congradulations, tell you what. If you finish all six of these I'll give a seventh for free!"
Guy: "Thanks, but if this many doesn't get the taste outta my mouth nothin will."
( o_0)-----(o)(o)

 

[Lullabye]

One of my favs- (I'm not sexist, i'm a dude)

And so God created the Garden of Eden, and in it put woman as he saw fit. Before he left he asked her "My child, I have created you in my image. Is there anything you may object to?" She said "Well yes, Lord. Why have you given me three breasts? I am made to raise but two children at a time, not entire litters." "You speak well, for I have made thee with wisdom. As you wish." There was a rush of wind and a flash, and woman was made with two breasts. She looked up and saw God holding the surplus breast in his hand. "But Lord, what are you going to do with that useless boob?"

And so man was created.

I find your avatar very disturbing btw. Seriously, PB? And he's humping to boot.

 

[Ace of Spades]

How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but the light bulb has to want to change.

 

[SqueeFactor]

i loves me some pedobear. and he's not humping, he's doing the 'peanut butter jelly time' dance. or is he?

 

[Ago Iterum]

do you like fishsticks?

This is the winner.

 

[Fulax]

I got a 3 day suspension the last time I told my favourite joke.

 

[Deathsong17]

Superman is flying through town, when suddenly he sees Woderwoman lying naked, spreadeaglead on a skyscraper. Seeing his chance, Superman flys down, does the buisness and in 5 seconds is finished and flying away. Suddenly Wonderwoman says "what was that?" so the Invisible Man replys "I don't know but it hurt alot!"

 

[ify_]

One of my favs- (I'm not sexist, i'm a dude)

And so God created the Garden of Eden, and in it put woman as he saw fit. Before he left he asked her "My child, I have created you in my image. Is there anything you may object to?" She said "Well yes, Lord. Why have you given me three breasts? I am made to raise but two children at a time, not entire litters." "You speak well, for I have made thee with wisdom. As you wish." There was a rush of wind and a flash, and woman was made with two breasts. She looked up and saw God holding the surplus breast in his hand. "But Lord, what are you going to do with that useless boob?"

And so man was created.

I saw it coming, but I really like that one...as will my wife!
------
I'll give you my favorite "bad" joke. And don't blame me, I stole it from Monty Python...

What's brown and sounds like a bell?

Spoiler

DUNG!