Your favourite insults

[Barbas]

"STAAART, YOU VICIOUS BASTARD!" - John Cleese, 1975.

* * *​

I was browsing YouTube today when I came across this little gem:

Spoiler: NSFW.

So, what are your own favourite insults from media? Extra points for creativity over profanity!

[HEADING=3]Let's try to keep it as Safe For Work as we can. "NSFW" spoiler tags for the more risqué stuff, please![/HEADING]

Also, if positivity is more your bag, check this thread out:
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.858069-Your-Favorite-Compliments

 

[Flutterguy]

Hrmm. Dingleberry, kneckbeard, dingus, casual, fluffer, tosser, artist, and of course cnt. The more out of context I can use them the more accomplished I feel.

 

[Bobic]

Would it be rude of me to just post this and call it a thread?


Yeah, probably, so I'll play properly.

The you're a **** speech from In Bruges, the 'you're an inanimate fucking object' from in Bruges. And anything said by the drill sergeant in Full Metal Jacket.

Trivia time!!!!!

The Drill Sergeant from that movie is a real life Drill Sergeant, who, originally hired as a technical consultant for the role, decided the current actor was crap, and recorded himself spewing out a stream of insults for 15 minutes straight whilst being pelted with fruit. He then got the job as the greatest ranty bastard ever. And cinema history was made.


Here he is for those who want to watch, with french (?) subtitles, in case you want learn how to effectively offend foreigners on your next holiday.

 

[Someone Depressing]

Spoiler: If youre selfish, and youre thoughtless, and youre broken and youre heartless, youre probly not a diva, you're a

****. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1bZfzscQMjU#t=54]

It has lost a lot of its edge, as it's basically being used as a full stop now, and hasn't ever been as strong in the UK as it has been in the US, but it's a very, very good insult.

 

[Asita]

Well this seems incredibly appropriate:


Also, I have a special place in my heart for "Bookah". Due to the comparatively niche market Guild Wars: Eye of the North occupied, it makes for a wonderful way to call someone a pretentious idiot without them realizing that you called them a pretentious idiot.

 

[CrazyGirl17]

Firefly has some good ones, plus they're all in Mandarin, so people won't know what you're saying. Here's a list: http://www.toplessrobot.com/2010/11/fireflys_15_best_uses_of_chinese_profanity.php

Do they just have to be insults? 'Cause there's some good profanity in there...

 

[Barbas]

(Snip).

(Snip).

These are good, but please put the more sweary stuff in spoiler tags. Angry rants are also accepted.

Kwijibo - "A big, dumb, balding North American ape with no chin and a short temper".

Also, one from Red Dwarf:

(...)Do they just have to be insults? 'Cause there's some good profanity in there...

Both are fine, so long as you keep the latter in NSFW tags and don't go overboard with it!

 

[Gordon_4_v1legacy]

I'm very fond of 'Twat' (which is like ****, but lacks the sharp edge) and for some reason 'Douche-canoe'; I must find the mental image of such an item very funny.

 

[Malbourne]

Overly rivalistic antagonists in video games typically have something to say!

Spoiler: Il Piantissimo!

[/spoiler]

And maybe it's a bit cheap, but I always find it amusing when the antagonist just repeatedly mangles the hero's name.

[spoiler=Also, it's a running theme with rivals that wear visors, apparently.]
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[img src=http://i1285.photobucket.com/albums/a585/griffawke/BlunderRed_zps23caca1e.jpg width=400 height=240]
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[/spoiler]

 

[War Penguin]

It's sad that you only limit it to media, because all of my favorites are the ones made by me. Y'know, like **** nugget, twat basket, fuck bucket, all that jazz. But if I had to choose media, I'll go for In Bruges. I know someone else posted it, but not with a video. So allow me to do the honors:


If you haven't watched that movie GO FUCKING WATCH IT NOW.

 

[Sniper Team 4]

The greatest insult of all time came from a freckle-face, slightly chubby catcher on a kid baseball team. And it goes like this:

"You play ball like a girl!"

 

[Ten Foot Bunny]

How funny... that was the FIRST item I pinned to my humor board after I first joined Pinterest! Most of my favorites are in there.

But if I had to choose media, I'll go for In Bruges.

I've never seen it before but that's exactly what I'll watch tonight. I'm shocked to see it's actually on Netflix streaming here in the U.S. Their selection is so lackluster that I always get surprised when someone suggests a movie and I actually find it.

 

[War Penguin]

But if I had to choose media, I'll go for In Bruges.

I've never seen it before but that's exactly what I'll watch tonight. I'm shocked to see it's actually on Netflix streaming here in the U.S. Their selection is so lackluster that I always get surprised when someone suggests a movie and I actually find it.

Holy hell, it's on Netflix? Fuck yeah, I'm gonna watch that shit again! Finally, Netflix has something I want to watch! xD

But seriously, it's an amazing movie. I've never laughed, then cried, then laughed, then cried again to such a film. Really hope you enjoy!

 

[Ten Foot Bunny]

But seriously, it's an amazing movie. I've never laughed, then cried, then laughed, then cried again to such a film. Really hope you enjoy!

Oh yes, I'm watching it right now and absolutely loving it! Thanks for the recommendation! I'd seen bits of this before but never thought to search out the entire movie. I didn't even know its name until it cropped up in this post.

OT - There's one slew of insults that I only just remembered, one that makes me laugh until I cry. It's not from a movie, but worth the price of admission nonetheless.

Spoiler: Meet Ruby!

 

[The Sanctifier]

Most of the taunts from Chivalry: Medieval Warfare are quite hilarious.

"Your like a wench, who's natural talents are poor". Also "When I run you through next is your mother". It sounds so hilarious in the game because of the old-school accents.

 

[maidenm]

Favourite? "Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries!" /bangs helmet and blows raspberries.

I am also very fond of arrogant insults. Insults that just makes you seem so... superior. I'm the kind of person who'd camly call someone "mentally challenged" before I yell "retarded" any day.

 

[TheSYLOH]

Spoiler: Coming Soon on BBC! The 12th Doctor! NSFW

 

[shootthebandit]

Spoiler: Coming Soon on BBC! The 12th Doctor! NSFW

Love malcolm tucker. My favourite of his was "you look like a sweaty fucking octopus trying to unhook a bra"

Some of my personal favourites are "**** nugget", "fuck knuckle" and "twat basket".

 

[Zhukov]

OT - There's one slew of insults that I only just remembered, one that makes me laugh until I cry. It's not from a movie, but worth the price of admission nonetheless.

Spoiler: Meet Ruby!

Oh God, that was gold.

I have now heard a parrot say "Bollocks". In a deadpan voice no less. I can die a happy man.