Your horrible pitch for good games

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Darzen

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Aug 27, 2009
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Fallout 3: Shoot a Child in the head till they're Knocked out!

Fable 3: The stronger you get the longer your sword grows!

Deadrising 2: Slaughter zombies while you wear a dress and cowboy hat.

Guitar Hero: Pretend to play the guitar!

EDIT:Kirby: Suck and Swallow till you win!
 

LadyRhian

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May 13, 2010
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Sims: Lets play dollies, electronic-style.
Sim City: Choke the world with crime and pollution, one city at a time.
Baldur's Gate: Everyone wants to kill you while you run around trying to find and kill your brother.
Baldur's Gate 2: Another guy wants to control you while you run around trying to find him and kill him.
Civilization V: Try to survive while Ghandi kicks your ass.
 

EqualNOpposite

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Mar 21, 2010
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Mass Effect: Run, Shoot, Micromanage, talk, talk, talk, and (if you talk enough) booty.
Doom: Run, shoot, guns, demons, MORE guns.
Bioshock: Would you kindly run and shoot?
WoW: don't stand in the fire, do throw lightning bolts.
Gears of War: CHAINSAW!!!!
 

Vykrel

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Feb 26, 2009
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Mass Effect: You play this dude that has to save the universe and stuff, but he also gets to bang alien chicks... It's gonna be awesome!
 

Tallim

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Mar 16, 2010
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Pokemon: Force wild animals to fight until near death for fun and profit.
Half-Life: Imagine you had a really bad day at work.
Manhunt: You know Reggie from accounts? yeah what he did.
Sonic: Your a hedgehog hooked on speed.
Planescape Torment: You have Alzeheimers and you don't know how you got here.
Bioshock: You see that little castle in your fishtank? Same idea only more so.
Bayonetta: I know you mock my hirsute fetish, but I have an idea.
 

Treeinthewoods

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May 14, 2010
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Fallout: New Vegas - Go there, get this, come back! Eat, drink, sleep!

Fallout 3 - Without DLC ending is abrup

Mass Effect 2 - Scan planets for valuable minerals! Small number of similar weapons to prevent confusion!

Borderlands - Pending GOTY? Why wait! Buy now and receive 200 Microsoft Points!
 

Jeysejak

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Oct 29, 2009
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Shooters: So there's this PMC, and they're secretly evil....

sorry, good games. Let's see....

Dragon Age: So we make this game, and we need text. Nine novels worth should do it...
Assassin's Creed: So we stick the player in a huge ancient world that he has to navigate via horse and walks slow, and he can't swim.
Assassin's Creed 2: So we fixed the swimming thing....
Portal: Let's come up with a internet meme! a rogue computer, a cake, and some holes in walls? okay, let's make a game out of it...
Katamari Damaci: So, we've given the game designer mushrooms and a sticky ball...
 

Merkavar

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Aug 21, 2010
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Half life. It will give you head crabs.
Medal of honour. Fight for the honour to be a snipers target.
Cod4 mw2. if you like abuse this is the game for you. both verbal and writen.
fallout new vegas. become the king of the wastelands. yaaaay
 

MrShowerHead

New member
Jun 28, 2010
1,198
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OFP: Run forward and die
ArmA II: Run forward and die.....WITH BETTER GRAPHICS!!!
Halo 3: Aliens.....Lots of them
Freelancer: Fly around with you ship.........IN SPACE!!!
 

DJDarque

Words
Aug 24, 2009
1,776
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Starfox: You use the boosters to get through.
Legend of Zelda (any sequel): Alright, this time when she gets kidnapped, Ganon's wearing a different outfit.
 

Polaris19

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Aug 12, 2010
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Halo - So see your this badass space marine...
Advent Rising - So see your this badass space marine...
Halo 2 - So your still this badass space marine, except now half the time your an alien...
Gears of War - So see your this badass space marine...
Crysis - So see your this badass space marine...
Mass Effect - So see your this badass space marine...
Halo 3 - So your this badass space marine...again....again...
Dead Space - So see your this badass space engineer...who fights like a space marine...
Halo: ODST - So see your this different badass space marine...
Lost Planet 2 - So see your this badass space marine...
Halo: Reach - So see your this other different badass space marine...
 

WhyLater

New member
Sep 21, 2009
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IWTBTG: Ok, you know how everyone's favorite part of playing video games is dying?

...That doesn't count, here's a real one:

Scribblenauts: Well, there are puzzles where you give Santa cookies and get kittens out of trees and stuff, but... REALLY it's just an excuse to see who would win in a fight between a dragon and Cthulu.
 

D Moness

Left the building
Sep 16, 2010
1,146
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lol nice ideas. I know some i use have bene used before still here it goes.

Metroid: backtrack, backtrack and do not forgot backtracking.
Baten Kaitos: Save the world by beating the enemy with cards.
F.E.A.R. : Small girl trying to scare you.
Fatal frame/Project zero : Take pictures in an old mansion.
Fallout 3 : Large tracks of land.
Devil may cry 4: Play with dolls
 

Squilookle

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Nov 6, 2008
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Polaris19 said:
Halo - So see your this badass space marine...
Advent Rising - So see your this badass space marine...
Halo 2 - So your still this badass space marine, except now half the time your an alien...
Gears of War - So see your this badass space marine...
Crysis - So see your this badass space marine...
Mass Effect - So see your this badass space marine...
Halo 3 - So your this badass space marine...again....again...
Dead Space - So see your this badass space engineer...who fights like a space marine...
Halo: ODST - So see your this different badass space marine...
Lost Planet 2 - So see your this badass space marine...
Halo: Reach - So see your this other different badass space marine...
That's not technically what the thread is about, but damn if your post isn't full of win! We need to expand it a bit though- Remember there's Doom and Quake as well, for instance...
 

repeating integers

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Mar 17, 2010
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Halo: Reach - Aliens invade a planet which isn't earth and you all die.

Mass Effect - You talk to people, read, and shoot things.

Homeworld - You command a massive fleet and... shoot other ships... in space...

Nah, it's impossible to make Homeworld sound bad.
 

Shoggoth2588

New member
Aug 31, 2009
10,250
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Bioshock: Hey guys, remember how great System Shock was? I think we should make that game for a console! But lets set it underwater so we don't get sued.

Dragon Age: Origin: I just played the best round of D&D...lets make that into a game.

Mass Effect 2: Remember how in the first one you had unlimited ammo and could explore dozens of planets? How about this time we restrict ammo and instead of going to non-plot planets, you just send probes out to them. In fact, let's make that a cornerstone to the upgrade system! It's going to be great! You can even probe Uranus!
 

dancinginfernal

New member
Sep 5, 2009
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MGS1 - Man goes to Alaska, meets another guy, and then finds a giant robot.

MGS2 - Blonde man wearing skintight suit listens to girlfriend complain in a high-pitched voice. Also robots.

MGS3 - Guy gets shot by his boss, shoots her back. Plus boobies.

MGS4 - Old man and his "partner" adopt child; old man punches brother while yelling a lot.

Also!

Earthbound - Play game as happy children, get mindfucked by final boss.

Fallout 3 - Walk around, shoot people; realize it's 6 months later.
 

CAPTCHA

Mushroom Camper
Sep 30, 2009
1,075
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Prototype: You climb up buildings, jump off them then climb up them again.
Gears of War: it's like really brown and shit.
Call of Duty: All the cool kids are playing it.