Zero Punctuation: Pokemon White

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themilo504

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nice one i would still love to live in the pokemon world even if i have to wear that chip atleast everybody agrees modern schools are terible and its a smarter idea to yust let them leave there home to catch animals and hope they dont die or blow up the world.
 

samaugsch

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Jyggalag said:
HAHAHA Ben Yahtzee doing a Pokemon review? I didn't even watch it yet and I can already tell it's going to be hilarious!
Yeah, I was hoping he would do one. :p
 
Sep 4, 2009
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I enjoyed playing Pokemon red when I was younger, and was immensely disappointed when playing Pokemon Diamond.

It was the same game, with 1,000 gimmicks and side shows tacked on - the Underground, Secret Bases, Dress Up & Accessories? Am I meant to be glad I didn't get the copy that had phone call spam from a braggard with a Rattata as a feature?

The graphics had gone from acceptable at the time of release (Red) to rather shoddy actually (Diamond). When the number of pokemon's rocketed up, the size of the project to animate them (so they look like something other than bouncing pixelated cardboard cutouts making screeching noises) shot through the roof. The sprite sheets from Streets of Rage 2 characterise the minor thugs better than event pokemon from a RPG released from nearly 2 decades later - even allowing for what is essentially pallete swapped shiny pokemon.

This is not a stylistic choice, it is low expectations on the players behalf. Pokemon's business model creates bloat - or really just a "here we go again!" ending - and this is a sign of a project choking under its own weight. Even rare or specific flavour animations don't exist. When two pokemon that are supposedly rivals (zangoose v seviper, for example) are brought out to battle, there is no additional roaring or snarling. When a pokemon flinches, it doesn't visibly flinch. Its like a 1920s silent film, where everything is spelled out.

Any attempting roleplaying in a game as linear as Pokemon is bathos. This is a show where even where the meat in food comes from has a don't-ask-don't-tell element to it. Everything is branded with the word "Poke-" in it. It is as immersive as banging your head against the outside of your locked front door and saying "I'm inside, I'm home, really!"

No actual skill can be used as an alternative for simply memorising the formulae that drive the game - the type effectiveness and weakness chart, the special abilities of individuals. Yes that's challenging, but its memorisation. There are no strategies - indeed using something like the FEAR Rattata is criticised, or considered plain cheating. Why? Because a player is no longer mechanically using the type chart and grinding to a high level to try to gain an advantage.

Pokemon Red was a great game. I will not hurt the feelings of fans of later games by insulting the sequels, but I will say this: they have been disappointments for me.
 

Aptspire

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Mar 13, 2008
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what's wrong with living in Crazy Nutjob Land, Yahtzee?
You can find Tom Cruise and Charlie Sheen living in there :p
 

jboking

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Onyx Oblivion said:
You got your game strategy thrown off by EMOLGA enough to complain about it? Pokemon wasn't EASY enough for you that a Gym Leader you COULDN'T sweep with one move is a negative point against it?

The bane of Yahtzee's existence.
In all fairness, I got thrown off by that gym too. There are heavy hints everywhere towards using ground pokemon, all of the trainers in her gym use typical electric types, and then she uses electric/flying. Me and Palpitoad were pissed. Also, I never really think what yahtzee says about the games are truly negative as much as just nitpicking things that bugged him. Which in this case, I laughed hard, because I understood his nitpick.

Onyx Oblivion said:
Still the Rock Tomb TM was in the area before the gym, and most Ground types can learn it. And should have learned it, expecting Flying types or not.
You really expect everyone to take the alternate path and get their ass kicked at the desert resort?
 

someonehairy-ish

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Orekoya said:
Jman1236 said:
Yeah the flying/electric type took me by suprise the first time I challenged that gym too. Whats worse is that she has 3/4 of them each with a TM move called Volt switch which damages you and swaps with a different member in her team, and here I thought that the Elite four were cheap.
That's actually really easy to counter, open with your slowest that is strong against flying and it'll use that move without fail but the second one will be hit so go with a heaviest attack move. Next move swap to a rock type to block the electric attack because it'll do it again and ko that weaken paper cannon before it can finish it's double team spamming to make itself untouchable.
I had a rock type thing, which I taught a move that damaged the pokemon whenever they switched in. I sat there using harden and allowed them to slowly kill themselves -.- boring but still quite satisfying :L
 

Sutter Cane

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Jun 27, 2010
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Pokemon white was hard yahtzee?

I pretty much had NO trouble with the gyms or bosses in black/white, like even less than usual. the elite four was laughably easy, and the only reason I had ANY trouble with Ghestis at all was because i didn't have an ice type. This accusation of the bosses being too hard confuses me.

Also, aren't the characters in Black/White supposed to be like 18? Not exactly little kids.
 

samaugsch

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themilo504 said:
nice one i would still love to live in the pokemon world even if i have to wear that chip.
Same. Then, I could just carry a whole bunch of wild Pokemon and swarm everyone who tries to challenge me. :D
 

Amplify

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Aug 31, 2008
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Jdb said:
I want to know why some people think Pokemon is a super-complex game. Raising Pokemon is complex, but when it comes to battles between similarly-raised Pokemon it's just crossing fingers and hoping the other guy doesn't send out scissors when paper is in play.
http://www.smogon.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=144&prefixid=warstory

Pick a thread, read the battle report contained within and the guy's thoughts on what he was going to do next and why etc for a standard competitive Pokemon battle.

Then look me in the eye and say that again.
 

samaugsch

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wc alligator said:
samaugsch said:
wc alligator said:
Yu-Gi-Oh! is still way better than pokemon actually. I don't know why it gets so much hate while pokemon doesn't.
Also, at least Yu-Gi-Oh! DOESN'T HAVE FUCKING LAND CARDS so I don't really see why MTG gets so much more respect than it either.
Nope. Instead, it has field cards, which are a lot like land cards.
Field cards were not essential for gameplay and weren't used at all, while in MTG you need land cards to do pretty much anything, so they are absolutely nothing alike. Your statement falls flat.
Got a point there. :p
 

JPArbiter

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Oct 14, 2010
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the entire reason I told Pokemon to fuck all (with the exception of my wife and I getting heartgold/soulsilver last year) is because it became pretty much impossible to "catch em all" as the classic marketing materiel challenged players to do.

GameFreak needs to develop a Wii Pokemon game with all freaking 600 of the buggers in them over an expansive world as large as the five generations combined.
 

Ekit

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Onyx Oblivion said:
Falseprophet said:
Onyx Oblivion said:
Besides, "catching them all" is no longer viable...or even the point, really. It's all about competitive play, with the advent of wi-fi in D/P/P.
Pokemon is now the middle school version of COD and Halo?
Do you know what Pokemon REALLY is?

It's secretly the deepest competitive strategy game ever.

IT HAS TIER LISTS

http://www.smogon.com/dp/articles/intro_comp_pokemon
OMG! D:

However, I would argue that the fact that it has tiers makes it less deep since that would mean that there are pokémons that are better than others, which leaves less room for strategy.
 

Onyx Oblivion

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Ekit said:
Onyx Oblivion said:
Falseprophet said:
Onyx Oblivion said:
Besides, "catching them all" is no longer viable...or even the point, really. It's all about competitive play, with the advent of wi-fi in D/P/P.
Pokemon is now the middle school version of COD and Halo?
Do you know what Pokemon REALLY is?

It's secretly the deepest competitive strategy game ever.

IT HAS TIER LISTS

http://www.smogon.com/dp/articles/intro_comp_pokemon
OMG! D:

However, I would argue that the fact that it has tiers makes it less deep since that would mean that there are pokémons that are better than others, which leaves less room for strategy.
I just like the word Tier...

I really just meant click the link.
 

randommaster

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C2Ultima said:
randommaster said:
You really should have picked up Pokemon Black, Yahtzee. It focuses on story rather than collecting a bunch of critters. At one point you have to choose whether to choose between your friend and your journey, with a branching story for each path. It's pretty much two entirely different games and it puts the Bioware writing staff to shame.

I'm sorry you had to get the wrong version to get back into what has become a great series.
What's the difference between White and Black? I'm pretty sure they're the same game, apart from a few version exclusives and White Forest/Black City.
Were you taking me seriously?
 

mrdude2010

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randommaster said:
You really should have picked up Pokemon Black, Yahtzee. It focuses on story rather than collecting a bunch of critters. At one point you have to choose whether to choose between your friend and your journey, with a branching story for each path. It's pretty much two entirely different games and it puts the Bioware writing staff to shame.

I'm sorry you had to get the wrong version to get back into what has become a great series.
yea that's totally comparable to KOTOR or ME2 in terms of writing. i'm astounded that bioware has skimmed by with so little effort put into their writing that a recycled story with one twist can put them to shame.
 

Arcanist

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Onyx Oblivion said:
You got your game strategy thrown off by EMOLGA enough to complain about it? Pokemon wasn't EASY enough for you that a Gym Leader you COULDN'T sweep with one move is a negative point against it?

The bane of Yahtzee's existence.
It's less that he couldn't sweep it in one hit and more that the game misled him. Like he said, everybody in the gym, both in and out, tell you to use Ground-Types. The area outside the city is filled with Ground Types. Then the game pulls a 180 and has you face a Flying Type. Confusing players like that is bad game design, and there's no excuse for it.