Zero Punctuation: Pokemon White
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
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While I am not particularly fond of how each new installment of Pokemon barely updates itself (this is why I tend to wait 3-4 games before buying a new Pokemon game), the gameplay mechanics themselves actually go fairly deep.
EV's and breeding the perfect moves and clever setups, it all kind of makes my brain hurt. The real heart of Pokemon is the competitive scene even though I've never really been able to get too into it myself.
None of the changes from game to game tend to affect the single player very much which is the reason I wait several games before jumping back in and I suspect the reason Yahtzee doesn't really like it (on top of his hatred for this sort of game in the first place).
EV's and breeding the perfect moves and clever setups, it all kind of makes my brain hurt. The real heart of Pokemon is the competitive scene even though I've never really been able to get too into it myself.
None of the changes from game to game tend to affect the single player very much which is the reason I wait several games before jumping back in and I suspect the reason Yahtzee doesn't really like it (on top of his hatred for this sort of game in the first place).
That's the thing...it's not a video, it's kinda a first person novelization of sorts. It probably doesn't even qualify as a proper Let's Play. Here...here's a snippet of what I'm doing to give you an idea.Ace IV said:
After leveling my Pokémon to my satisfaction...if you can call the realization that Woobat are finicky creatures, apparently, since my White one evolved at Lv16 and the other has YET to evolve...I decided to take on the Gym using my Timburr, Sawk, and Throh. Now, into the Gym and...
Never mind...it's a bloody museum run by the Gym Leader's husband and the Gym's in the back. Look...I KNOW the economy is crap right now, but can I PLEASE go to a Gym that's just a Gym?!? Oh look...and they apparently don't recognize a Dragonite skeleton, a fossilized Armaldo, or a Marowak's bones since they don't mention them by name. So much for them being experts...
Anyways, I head into the Gym proper, another yutz appears to give me a free Fresh Water, and then I head into the Gym. No...it's a library, and apparently the Gym Leader wants me to find several notes she's strewn throughout. Christ...bad enough she won't take me directly to her, now she wants to play find the right book?!? Anyways, the final book had a hidden switch opening a path to the Gym below. Why they won't just let us find the switch proper is beyond me. I know they want to test us, but TEST US IN BATTLE YOU TWATS!
Anyways, I manage to off her two normal types handily with Laurel and Hardy...er, Sawk and Throh. Unfortunately, after getting my nice shiny Basic Badge, which will probably need to be shined later by that stupid use of the Touch Screen, hubby runs in and says someone's stelaing fossils. Oh God...more sidequest and scripted bullshit.
Yep...it's Team D&D Rejects and they're stealing the Dragonite's skull in the name of liberation. Not exactly sure how they're going free that Dragonite since it's already dead. What are they going to do...perform an exorcism?
Anyways, they run off with the skull using a smoke bomb and we run out to find they've gone. We also run into Burgh, the next town's Gym Leader, and tell him what the sitch is. Oh...and here come my two friends/rivals/whatever to help. Apparently, helping meaning staying put and dinking around while I and the Gym Leaders do the search and destroy...or rather faint...mission. Bianca gives me a Dowsing Machine, and I head to Pinwheel Forest. If I see Plus and Minus playing "Got You Last" again, I'm leaving.
Think I should post everything I have so far here on the Escapist to see what people think?
fantastic show this one is. a righteous laugh XD
Also would like an inner-city wifi connection like japan
Also would like an inner-city wifi connection like japan
LOL Really funny review. From the outside looking in, I ttotally get what he's saying, but for a guy like me whose played... well every Pokemon game really, it's the little oddities that give it character and I found this review really funny and true, while still loving the series.
The tiers are based on usage, so if everyone decided to put Magikarp on their team, it would be considered high tier.Ekit said:
Another excellent emission, but I'm still hoping ZP will review the hell out of Homefront. We're talking about an ultra-American mostly multiplayer FPS with an utterly retarded story. It's like everything Yahtzee loves to complain about all rolled together in one game.
Sounds like an LP to me, but I'm used to written LPs from SomethingAwful, as well as old game reports from people who went through Diablo and Civ. There'll be an audience, assuming you're entertaining enough.GamemasterAnthony said:
Haha I knew smogon would come up. When Yahtzee was going on about the 1 strategy approach all I could think of was "tell that to those guys". EV's and STAB are just the basics, uhm okay yes I admit it, I did some EV training and yes I did fish every square for a fucking Feebas to get a Milotic. But when I finally got one I was like meh, don't really care anymore. Seriously, I haven't touched the game for years. Anyway I've been waiting years for Yahtzee to review Pokemon and wasn't disappointedOnyx Oblivion said:
I love the Pokemon Franchise to bits and have played every generation and am currently playing Pokemon White as we speak. However I do agree with Yahtzee's review on the game completely. While this Generation is loads better than Generation 5 in terms of how the world is structured (Sinnoh was just horrible, Mt Coronet with them Zubat and Geodudes just made me want to kill myself) and how the combat is sped up(I literally had to turn all the animatons off in Heartgold cause I just couldn't stand the wait anymore), the game has still hardly evolved in these last 15 years.
Don't give me that EV Metagame crap either, that should not be considered part of the core gameplay since it is never at all even hinted at in the actual game. EV training is just something players have abused of throughout the years to make their Pokemon even better. Heck the actual process is so horrible, most just opt to playing on Shoddy Battles and online web games which allow players to create Pokemon to their EV specifications and battle them immediately.
As for turn based combat in general, it should die in a fire. Turn Based combat was awesome when it was justified, but especially in Pokemon Turn Based combat completely alienates me from being a trainer with his partners and instead makes me feel like I am playing chess. I literally hope and dream for a real-time Pokemon game but apart from swirling cameras and some better superficial 3d, I doubt Gamefreak is actually ever going to breathe some new life in this series for the sake of innovation, since after all their nostalgia cow can still be milked for all it's worth.
Don't give me that EV Metagame crap either, that should not be considered part of the core gameplay since it is never at all even hinted at in the actual game. EV training is just something players have abused of throughout the years to make their Pokemon even better. Heck the actual process is so horrible, most just opt to playing on Shoddy Battles and online web games which allow players to create Pokemon to their EV specifications and battle them immediately.
As for turn based combat in general, it should die in a fire. Turn Based combat was awesome when it was justified, but especially in Pokemon Turn Based combat completely alienates me from being a trainer with his partners and instead makes me feel like I am playing chess. I literally hope and dream for a real-time Pokemon game but apart from swirling cameras and some better superficial 3d, I doubt Gamefreak is actually ever going to breathe some new life in this series for the sake of innovation, since after all their nostalgia cow can still be milked for all it's worth.
Heh, figures he wouldn't even comment on the competitive scene of pokemon.
I suppose his patience would die halfway through just reading about what you're supposed to do to get a competitive team.
Funny vid all the same though. It's just sad that he really doesn't get what pokemon is supposed to be for people who are not 10 or younger.
I suppose his patience would die halfway through just reading about what you're supposed to do to get a competitive team.
Funny vid all the same though. It's just sad that he really doesn't get what pokemon is supposed to be for people who are not 10 or younger.
I can't tell if you're serious or not, which I find hilarious since people seem to have the same problem with me.mrdude2010 said:
Well, a big fat check for being good at it sure helps. At this point, Pokemon has its hardcore/casual audience defined almost entirely by multiplayer, and it's interesting to see just how different the game is to both audiences.Lucie said:
Are you...joking? Or are you just that thick? Or maybe you are just 6 years old and can't keep up with good writing just yet. Because I think you just compared Bioware to Pokemon.... scuse me I gotta go clean this blood pouring from my nose just from saying that...randommaster said:
My own opinon on pokémon is that I'm one of the few gulible die-hard fans that was even prepared to fork over the cash for an imported Japaneese version because I couldn't be bothered to wait 3 months for it to be released in a language I could understand (which I then bought as well..).
Rather silly when you think about it...
I'm glad that he pointed out the problems I had too. Mostly regarding the Electric Gym.
Incidentally; now all he has to do is review a Touhou game and he'll have reviewed every game I never expected him to review ever.
Rather silly when you think about it...
I'm glad that he pointed out the problems I had too. Mostly regarding the Electric Gym.
Incidentally; now all he has to do is review a Touhou game and he'll have reviewed every game I never expected him to review ever.
Are you surprised? Yahtzee's one of the most outspoken critics of leaning on multiplayer ever. The single player game is pretty basic, so commenting on it is fair game for reviewers.Dreiko said:
Yup.Onyx Oblivion said:
Yahtzee contradicts himself here; whining about how there's only one strategy and then turning about and whining that his preconception didn't work 100% of the time. That's award-winning comedy right there.
I owned the Elite 4 in one go without retrying once. I don't think they even managed to kill one of my Pokemon. I was kinda disappointed. This is including N and Ghetsis.ImBigBob said: