A pieceof advice I might never forget

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Funkysandwich

Contra Bassoon
Jan 15, 2010
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The most amusing piece of advice I've ever seen is in the learner driver handbook for Victoria, in Australia.

It says "When in doubt, don't pull out"
Good driving advice, but probably bad advice for at least one other activity.
 

Latinidiot

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Feb 19, 2009
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oOPolakOo said:
This is one I can't quiet remember were I got from, "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind"

I thought it was pretty good.

and what my dad told me, "What you don't learn, you don't know"
the first one was from Ghandi.
a piece of advice I live by:


CALM THE FUCK DOWN
 

Bazooka-Joe

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Nov 25, 2009
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Only one who has been in hell can really see heaven.

I guess that kinda refers to the way we tend to take good things as given as long as we have them, and only start to see what we had when it's gone.

*Sigh*
 

Eekaida

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Jan 13, 2010
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"Don't cut off your nose to spite your face." i remember my mother telling me this becuase it such a weird image. but its a good messege - don't react now if it will bite you in the ass later.
 

metalmmaniac

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Jun 30, 2009
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I remember this from scrubs, although i'd be willing to bet its been said before.
'all the best things in life don't come easy.' or something along those lines...
 

Sjakie

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Feb 17, 2010
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"violence is the quickest solution too any problem."

If it's not, you are not applying enough violence
 

stok3r

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Dec 23, 2009
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Haseo21 said:
I was in one of my classes today, and I over heard a freshman saying something that caught my attention,

He said "Drunk words are sober thoughts"

Has anyone ever said anything that you took to heart and listen too?
I've said a lot of stupid but true things while drunk, but I've only done one particularly stupid thing while drunk.

Hmm, dunno if anyone's said this her yet, but: You don't find love, love finds you.

It's an incredibly depressing thought
 

SenseOfTumour

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Jul 11, 2008
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One I heard on 8 out of 10 cats:

" It takes 45 muscles to frown, but only 7 to pull the trigger on a sniper rifle. "
 

stok3r

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Dec 23, 2009
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Shaegor said:
SteelStallion said:
Wow... you guys get this sentimental when you're drunk? I just jump around, wrap my arm around anything that moves and laugh excessively.
Well then my friend, you are not drunk enough.
Fucking True. When I get too drunk, I get depressed. It is the worst.
 

wootsniper

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Aug 6, 2009
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Doitpow said:
I was at a graveyard near home and i saw a grave that said.

Stranger take heed as you pass by,
as you are now, so once was I,
As I am now, Soon you will be,
Prepare yourself to follow me.

Oh dear
A graveyard near home?

anyway, that's awesome, i'l never forget that one!
 

Samnite

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Sep 21, 2009
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Hopeless Bastard said:
Samnite said:
One of the few pieces of useful advice my Dad gave me;

"Forgiveness is easier to get than permission."
You realize thats a cunthair away from justifying rape? Hell, it IS justifying rape. Your dad raped your mother.
Who said it justified anything?
 

Samnite

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Sep 21, 2009
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I said it's easier to get, I didn't say you're going to get it. And people who do say things like that aren't automatically rapists - pretty sure people are capable of using their own morals with that kind of thing. You can go ahead to use that justification to rape people if you like.
 

Raikov

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Mar 1, 2010
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I read this in a book once: "You are brought into this world crying while people stands around you, smiling. Live your life so that you can die smiling, while people are crying all around you".

It may be slightly wrong quoted, since It's translated.

But if you really want a good piece of advice, always tell the truth and be brutally honest. And don't hide your feelings, it's no fun that way!
 

TheRundownRabbit

Wicked Prolapse
Aug 27, 2009
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Sjakie said:
"violence is the quickest solution too any problem."

If it's not, you are not applying enough violence
That is probably the greatest thing I have ever heard

oh I almost forgot, "Dont shit were you eat!"
 

Aerodyamic

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Aug 14, 2009
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SakSak said:
This one came from my cousin:

"Procrastination is like masturbation: All well and good, but one day you'll wake up and realize that you're just screwing yourself over."

And my lieutenant from military training said this one:

"Excuses are like a**holes: everyone has one and I'm interested in neither"

Both should be pretty self explanatory.
I like the other variation:

"Opinion are like assholes; everyone has one, they stink, and you need to keep yours to yourself."