A question to women

[high_castle]

I'm absolutely aware. Whether or not it bothers me depends on the situation.

I live in an area that's very hot for most of the year. I work outside. As such, I wear tanktops not for anyone else's viewing pleasure, but to avoid passing out from heat stroke. I'm not wearing anything ridiculously revealing, I'm just trying to stay comfortable. Now, if someone glances down for a second, that's not so bad. It's instinct. I'll admit my eyes have wandered before I can think about it, too. It's when someone keeps staring that it makes me feel uncomfortable.

What's more disturbing, though, is this idea I've seen where a woman wearing low cut shirts is somehow asking to be objectified. No, she's not. She's wearing something she wants to for her own reasons.

 

[FrostyChick]

I guess I must be some kind of mutant freak for not noticing...
But then again I've never been all that observant to the actions of so called "normal" people.
That said I myself am massively guilty of staring, it's just the way my mind works really... Then again I have a tendency to zone out so sometimes it's not because I have the urge to bury my face in them, but more my brain has gone to sleep.

 

[Dystopia]

Of course we notice. Mine are big (I'm not saying the size cos they're bigger than anyone in this thread has mentioned so far) and I absolutely hate them, but it doesn't mean I won't use them to my advantage. I won't get my cleavage out when I'm out shopping or anything, but on a night out they're good for free drinks so if they're out, you're meant to notice them. If they're out, I can't exactly expect guys to be all polite and not look...

We have a love/hate relationship though, I'm currently trying to get 'em reduced.

 

[IrisEver]

I dont even notice. Whether someone is choosing to look at me is none of my concern. People can look at you for any reason. What the fuck ever, that's just what goes on.

If some random guy takes time out of his day to stare at my cleavage, or anyones cleavage, because he has nothing better to do or think about right that moment then good for him. It's not hurting me, and I really couldn't care less. It's his business where he looks.

 

[Robert Ewing]

I am attracted to both women and men. But women to a much higher degree. The chance I'll look and admire a womans body is a about 95%, depending on how attractive I find her. The chance of me looking and admiring a male body is probably around 15%.

It's the same story when I'm driving, every time a nice girl walks past, I must look... I can't not look. Its just instinct... What can I say? Any well sculpted body, I'll admire.

 

[Ariseishirou]

1. I'm a AA.
2. I have never once noticed anyone staring.

Hah hah same.

Legs, though, that's another story. And to answer your question I don't really mind a bit. If I'm exposing them, they're on display. Trying to touch is where it crosses the line.

 

[MetalMagpie]

Can't say I notice all that often. Then again, my assets aren't exactly generous, so I get more stares at ass level than at chest level. I don't mind either way; glad to be nice to look at.

Return question: How often do you guys notice girls checking out your ass? And do you mind?

Never. I honestly can't say I think anyone does that But keep in mind, an ass is on the opposite side of my body from my eyes, so it is hard to know.

Where as a girl has eyes and breasts at the same side, so you are facing the "looker" when he looks

Well, I do it a lot. And I know plenty of other girls who do. But I take your point; since I tend to check out guys as they're walking AWAY from me, there's not much risk of them noticing.

 

[MetalMagpie]

Just don't bloody stare. I know some women don't mind if you have a glance, some even like it, but they hate being stared at.

To start off with: women usually dress to please themselves, or each other. Many times it has little to do with men.

Both good rules of thumb. But I thought I'd say (just for the record) that I actually get a real kick out of guys staring at me. And when I get dressed for a night out, it really IS the guys I'm dressing for. (In particular, my boyfriend.)

But you can't judge whether or not a woman wants to be stared at (or who the clothes are for) from how she's dressed alone, so stick to subtle.

 

[PaganFury]

Women flaunt them to find a mate its hardwired.. Men look to find mates also hardwired. That being said I think all men can agree some guys stare waaaaaay to hard and some women like to show them off a little too much.

 

[intheweeds]

Oh, they know. And, if they complain, they're bullshit.

You chose
To expose

This x 1000.

Why do some of them (not all) complain about this? I mean seriously, us men are fairly primitive beasts in terms of things we want. So of course if you expose yourself this way, men will stare. It's a fact of life - get over it.

You complain that women 'ask' for it and shouldn't complain because you will look if outfits are intentionally revealing, however there is this:

Well I don't really dress in a way that makes them obvious so I don't think guys really look. If it's just a quick glance it doesn't bother me but if they're staring for a while it's annoying.

i can promise, they do. maybe not as much as if they were hanging out, but they still do.

EDIT: just for fun, try this once, wear DARK sunglasses while talking to a guy, whether its a cashier, a coworker, or just a random guy. maintain direct eye contact the entire time. when a guy isn't sure if you're looking or not, he'll still most likely take his chances. i guarantee most of them will drop their eyes at least once. especially if the shirt is at all revealing.

So I have a sneaking suspicion you would stare regardless of the woman's clothing choices or intentions.

OT: No it isn't okay. Seriously if guys knew what it was like to have women staring at their package everywhere they went, they wouldn't like it either. Straight women like dick, but they don't feel the need to stare at yours and creep you out about it. Guys, seriously, you aren't mindless apes, stop acting like you can't control yourselves. Half the time your trying to say you aren't mindless penises and women shouldn't be concerned, and the other half of the time you are straight up admitting you can't control yourselves?

You can control yourselves, you just don't want to. Start wanting to, you aren't a friggin' animal.

Edit: I feel as I should specify so as not be misunderstood. I'm not talking about the quick 'checking you out' look. Everyone does that. If someone is attractive, you check them out. Nothing wrong with that. It's the 'breast stare' that I have a problem with. Every woman knows exactly what I'm talking about.

 

[AngryMongoose]

I don't know if they notice, but I'm certainly not aware when I'm staring at a girls breasts. Of course, when I' tired (90% of the time), I'll stare at everything.

 

[PaganFury]

I noticed something funny with a female friend of mine... We were out at a bar and an ugly guy was checking her out. She got offended and said what a pig. Later that night a good looking guy was totally staring at her like a shark checks out a tuna. This didn't bother her even a little bit.

So let me ask you ladies how often is it about how attractive the guy is....

If it's Leonardo Dicaprio is it more okay than if its John Goodman?

 

[PaganFury]

LOL if you've never caught a girl checking out you package... well maybe its you package because girls DO check. Some at least.]

*EDIT* hmm it didnt quote the quote i wanter to quote

 

[EmperorSubcutaneous]

1. I'm a AA.
2. I have never once noticed anyone staring.

Hah hah same.

Legs, though, that's another story.

My ASSets are elsewhere.

Though it does make it difficult to notice if people are staring...

 

[Terrara]

Well... of course we do. Why do you think anyone would show cleavage otherwise??? It's a very basic mating tactic really. That's why we will only get offended if we find the staring person unattractive.

 

[spartan231490]

They know. They might not notice every time you look, but in general they know.

Fun story: I got caught in a hard down-shirt once. Looked up and she was looking right at me. She was awesome though, she just gave me this "I'm sexy and I know it" smile, and that was it.

 

[Nemu]

Notice all of the time.

Only time it ever really bothered me was in high school when some jerk actually went so far as to "air honk" me. Real classy. I suspect that guy is in jail for molesting a child now...

 

[tobyornottoby]

You're right, life is vague and grey, and a woman who has chosen to wear a shirt that reveals a significant portion of her breasts is going to be interpreted by some as "this woman has chosen to objectify herself and since I have the right to look wherever I want I am going to look at them". However, there is no unspoken rule that says "one must never stare at a woman's breasts when they are on display". After all, why should a woman be allowed to tempt men with their sexual organs and then place specific "unspoken rules" on the length and degree to which they are allowed to look at said sexual organs else they risk chastising, despite the woman obviously doing it to garner attention in the first place. That's so unnecessarily complicated and unfair that I see no reason to abide by such a rule. If I'm wearing a speedo I'm not going to yell at someone for staring at my butt if it makes me uncomfortable, I'll probably just not wear a speedo. In fact I know a lot of guys who will take full advantage and see nothing wrong in doing so, especially if it's someone they don't know or will never talk to again. I don't agree with them but I can't say I blame them. In my mind, if a woman is so desperate for attention that she must expose her body in order to boost her self-esteem, I have very little respect for her in the first place. It's really, really simple, if you don't want a guy staring at your breasts, cover them up. There's no need for foggy greys here. If he's still staring, then I think you'd have a good reason to speak up.

"If you don't want to get hit by a car, never ever cross the road".

The point I was trying to make with the shopkeeper thingy too (which was indeed a bad analogy, but good enough for the point) is that a certain cause can have a number of effects. You don't have to accept them all. Some are desirable, others are not.

Also, the female body has evolved as a sexual signalling device, way more than the male body which is more pragmatically built. Having no respect for them for following biology is unfair.

Also, What do you mean that's not how the world works? What does "clearness consiceness" even mean? I don't even know if you're trying to say "Conscience" or "consciousness". I'm not insulting you, really, I just think you should consider improving your spelling/grammar. I had some trouble with your shop keeper analogy earlier too.

Hehe, in your previous post you used "clear and concise" so I just put 'ness' after them (and seem to have made a c into an s) but I didn't know that wasn't an actual word =p
Sorry for that.

 

[Gavmando]

Men get caught staring because of the way our eyesight has evolved since we were cave men. Our eyes evolved to be able to see prey at long distance and to have an almost tunnel vision.
Women's eyes didn't need to do this as they were more about protecting the nest and the young. This made it so that a woman has better peripheral vision than a man as she didn't need to hunt things. (This doesn't mean that she cant. It just means that men's eyes evolved that way.)

Both sexes look at things that attract them as much as the other. Guys just get caught for it more as our eyes aren't able to see as great a range of peripheral vision as a woman's.

As for boobs: The attraction for cleavage is because they remind us of a bum. The more healthy a bum is, the more fertile the woman is, and the more likely she could bear our offspring. And humans, being the only, (or one of the only,) animals that mate face to face, having another "bum" on the front makes a woman more attractive to a man. Plus, the bigger they are the more likely she will be able to produce milk for any children that she may have.

And, since we're pretty much just smart animals, we look at anyone who enters our vision. This is an instinctual thing. If we are aware of someone else, we need to assess if they are a threat or not. Everybody looks everybody else they meet up and down. You do it subconsciously. But men get caught for it due to our lack of peripheral vision.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

By the way guys, girls check us out as well.

Yes, even you.