JeffBergGold said:
Just because you don't like it doesn't mean it's not true!
I really don't care about the conversation between you two, I just knew this would come up at some point and I'd like to say: just because it's true doesn't mean it has anything to do with this thread.
So humans are designed to procreate with everyone, everywhere, all the time. That's not the point.
When people enter a monogamous relationship, the point is to remain monogamous. The reasons are varied, so I won't get into it. What's important is that the people cheating have broken an oath; A verbal, written or otherwise mutually understood contract between a person and their partner. The terms often vary, but in just about every case the main tenet is that the two people are sexually exclusive. For whatever reason, these people chose to resist, subdue or otherwise rid themselves of their natural desire to procreate with various individuals, in favor of one consistent sexual partner. I'm not saying that monogamy itself is inherently right or wrong, I'm saying that both parties agreed to it and must respect their agreement
My rebuttal dismisses sex drive entirely. Men and Women shouldn't cheat because it's a breach of the contracts they made. If one wants to be free of the constraints of monogamy, more power to them. I hope they find happiness in sexual independence. What I'm saying is that as soon as you enter into a monogamous relationship, you need to stick with it until it's over. That's either death or the willful termination of the contract by one or both parties.
I won't try to tell you monogamy is natural. I won't tell you it's easy. I won't tell you it's right for everyone. I will tell you that it's wrong to breach that self-imposed restriction. If you really must have a justification for that belief, the idea is that if you can't be held to your word, you can't be trusted in any capacity because of the element of doubt that is introduced.
So here it is in order, from most basic element to my rebuttal of your statement:
-If you break a contract, any contract, an element of doubt is introduced in all past, present and future contracts. This makes it much harder to trust you.
-When you enter into a monogamous relationship, you've chosen to be sexually exclusive with someone. This is your agreement, your contract.
-Having sex with a third party is a violation of your agreement.
-You cannot be trusted, as per point 1.
If you don't want to be monogamous, don't enter into monogamy in the first place, work out some alternative partnership in which you are not sexually exclusive, or call up your significant other and tell them that your contract is terminated. All three of those things free you up to indulge your natural instincts without being the least bit wrong.
The chick the OP mentioned is an asshole, because she's decided she's going to go around willfully breaking contracts, upsetting people and messing with their moral compasses. For one partner, there's a feeling of betrayal, and for the other, there's roughly a 50-50 shot that they feel remorse they'll never truly rid themselves of. It's not wrong for her to have sex with whoever she wants, as long as she's single. What makes her an asshole is the fact that she's actively seeking out men who are already contracted to someone else, and breaks those contracts up. She could have sex with ANYONE and she chooses to have sex exclusively with people who are not supposed to have sex with her. The cheating men are assholes too, in the same way that anyone who cheats on anything or betrays any kind of romantic or platonic partnership is an asshole. People who break contracts suck, whether they're your sexual partner or they're your partner in crime and they shot you and took all the cash. She's the bigger asshole because she breaks a contract she has no part in, to the detriment to both parties. One is emotionally wounded, and the other is left unfit to be trusted. She just moves right on to the next couple, spreading the misery and probably disease.
