Asked out a girl today... :D
- Thread starter Spoonius
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Welcome to the world of "getting in the game".
As you can see, you're ahead of the curve now. And just like killing, the next one is always easier. My philosophy... Cast a wide net. Do not get bogged down with this idea of only asking out people you think are perfect. There's no way you can know that until you've dated someone for a while. Get out there and ask another one, and another. You've already experienced the worst answer possible... No. It's not so bad, is it?
As you can see, you're ahead of the curve now. And just like killing, the next one is always easier. My philosophy... Cast a wide net. Do not get bogged down with this idea of only asking out people you think are perfect. There's no way you can know that until you've dated someone for a while. Get out there and ask another one, and another. You've already experienced the worst answer possible... No. It's not so bad, is it?
Again, you can thank the Irish for advancing civilisation. Look up the "Claddagh Ring". Does exactly what you want. And yes, it works. I current wear mine in the "single" position and it has gotten me load by a very nice French-Canadian girl.MickDick said:
If reverence of people who actually take action is whats needed to stamp out the friend-zone nice guy bullshit ill do it. Ill sacrifice a thousand kittens to Keila Mensha Khaine if it fucking stops the madness of being passive aggressive about the dating scene while simultaneously doing absolutely nothing to help yourself then blaming the entire world but you. It angers me to the point where reading this is like reading about a person walking on fucking water.Vegosiux said:
That sounds like the situation here in Yorkshire. Except it's more a chanting of things no more than about 4 syllables. I got "GET HER NUM-BER" the other day, chanted with all the Barnsley grace of a shitting bear.anthony87 said:
OT: Good one lad! Actually asking is probably the single most difficult part of the whole ordeal. Good luck for next time!
I'll never understand why people set themselves up for rejection like that. What interest could one possibly have in someone they've not spoken to for 15 minutes?
She saved both of you a great deal of trouble by rejecting you. My brother goes about things the same way. Asks out a girl the day he meets her, starts having second thoughts two week later but since they're already physically intimate by this point breaking it off is all awkward and messy because of all the conflicting emotions. Ends up dragging out a relationship that shouldn't have lasted five weeks for five months.
She saved both of you a great deal of trouble by rejecting you. My brother goes about things the same way. Asks out a girl the day he meets her, starts having second thoughts two week later but since they're already physically intimate by this point breaking it off is all awkward and messy because of all the conflicting emotions. Ends up dragging out a relationship that shouldn't have lasted five weeks for five months.
In short: Lots of peopleI_am_a_Spoon said:
In long: Hitting on girls is super easy if you're just casual about it. Even if it's a 3 minute conversation where you make her laugh once and then get her number....
Good luck in your future endeavors! And don't be disheartened. The "I have a boyfriend" line is a bugger, but what can you do? She's probably flattered that you paid her the attention.
I used to be scared of people in general...... but the weird thing is in the last 2 months ive probably made 11 new friends.. its weird because its a split difference.. half female and half male.. and lots of people think one of them likes me! ... *weird* but its great!
Your brain locked up because you try and juggle too much at once. Life's hard enough sometimes to juggle events from just your own perspective. Don't make it harder by speculating what it looks like from others' point of view. It's a waste of time anyway, since you can never be sure what they think anyway.
Now read your story again:
Next time- focus only on the girl as you see her, forget about how you look and seem etc- that's all been taken care of beforehand. If you want to ask someone out- just give it a go. Directly. I'd even reccomend you try it within 30 seconds of seeing the next girl you like. If you crash and burn: it's a learning experience. If she says yes and it doesn't work out- it's a learning experience. If she says yes... [http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/24841483.jpg]
Now read your story again:
I've taken out all the tangents, all the clutter, all the useless diversions you allowed into your head that combined to trip you up. You see how straightforward it is now? If you just focus on the important stuff, difficult actions get a lot easier. Stop watching yourself from above, stop reading your own expressions from others' point of view, etc... it's all just speculation. You never really know what someone is thinking until they tell you themselves. Until then, it's okay to act without knowing all the variables. It's okay to give something a shot- even if you think it is likely to fail.I_am_a_Spoon said:
Next time- focus only on the girl as you see her, forget about how you look and seem etc- that's all been taken care of beforehand. If you want to ask someone out- just give it a go. Directly. I'd even reccomend you try it within 30 seconds of seeing the next girl you like. If you crash and burn: it's a learning experience. If she says yes and it doesn't work out- it's a learning experience. If she says yes... [http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/24841483.jpg]
I'm proud of you man, you did well even in the face of failure. However if you had me listening in threw the handsfree headset while you did this, I would've went into convulsions after the long pause and sister comment.