Do either of you like hockey? It seems to be a fun date thing for peeps to do. My girlfriend and I do it all the time, along with dinner or Picnics too.
Asking a girl out
- Thread starter Cortheya
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you've read all of the above? ok, now ignore it.
DON'T write her a letter. that's a bad idea. take it from me.
I'm going to try and simplify an explanation for you. short answer though is 2 words: Mystery Method. research that (aka Love Systems, or Dating Science) hit google and youtube - don't scoff, these guys are just geeks who've worked out how to attract girls through trial and error. there's some good advice there even tough it's meant for over 18s, there's good stuff there you can take as a 15yo.
I wouldn't walk in and say 'hey, do you wanna go out?' straight up, because if she doesn't know u so well she's unlikely to say yes right away. and even if she does know you it could be kind of upfront and unexpected.
so first: start talking to her, about something interesting, or kind of cool, and that you think is interesting or kind of cool too. e.g. some funny-awesome Youtube clips, or that you're hoping to get a pinball machine for Christmas, or a story about your mate's little sister trying to wasg a cat or whatever suits you.
Also important: smile, be friendly, funny and tactile. don't be boring, quiet and shitting yourself. it's ok to make fun of her a bit, or joke and play around. and don't kiss her ass unless she does something to deserve it. NO:"OMG ur so hot ily4eva!!" OK:"wow! you speak french and italian? that's so cool, teach me to say something".
by tactile I mean touchy. touch her arm, or hi-5 her or punch her shoulder in a friendly way when you're talking. if you're not awkward about it it'll make you both feel more comfortable, and down the line you can build up to holding hands, hugging, and kissing. waaay easier than ending up on a date and making a huge move to kiss her. build up to it.
So once you've got a rapport with her and she's talking and laughing, you can ask her out. be specific, and don't make it a big deal. so not "Sooo... do you want to go out sometime?..." but something more like: "Hey, what are you doing Thursday? we should go to the mall." or "My buddy's got a pool party on Saturday night, you should come along. but you have to promise not to embarrass me".
It's better if you already know when she's free, or are talking about something she'd be interested in. "Well if you're free Friday, come and play some pool, I'll show you that trick shot I was telling you about."
if she says no, say "ok, next time then." it's not the end of the world unless you make it.
by the way, I'm making most of these quotes up as I go, change em as applicable to you. do something fun and active that you can do together, like shopping or walking your dog or throwing rocks at cars, not passive like a movie or show because you can't interact with each other doing that. and do something you'd enjoy doing anyway.
Hope that helps you out anyway, let us know how you go!
Relax!!!
(edit. ok, not ALL of the advice here is bad. Epitome and Random Argument Man make some good points. Confident and relaxed)
DON'T write her a letter. that's a bad idea. take it from me.
I'm going to try and simplify an explanation for you. short answer though is 2 words: Mystery Method. research that (aka Love Systems, or Dating Science) hit google and youtube - don't scoff, these guys are just geeks who've worked out how to attract girls through trial and error. there's some good advice there even tough it's meant for over 18s, there's good stuff there you can take as a 15yo.
I wouldn't walk in and say 'hey, do you wanna go out?' straight up, because if she doesn't know u so well she's unlikely to say yes right away. and even if she does know you it could be kind of upfront and unexpected.
so first: start talking to her, about something interesting, or kind of cool, and that you think is interesting or kind of cool too. e.g. some funny-awesome Youtube clips, or that you're hoping to get a pinball machine for Christmas, or a story about your mate's little sister trying to wasg a cat or whatever suits you.
Also important: smile, be friendly, funny and tactile. don't be boring, quiet and shitting yourself. it's ok to make fun of her a bit, or joke and play around. and don't kiss her ass unless she does something to deserve it. NO:"OMG ur so hot ily4eva!!" OK:"wow! you speak french and italian? that's so cool, teach me to say something".
by tactile I mean touchy. touch her arm, or hi-5 her or punch her shoulder in a friendly way when you're talking. if you're not awkward about it it'll make you both feel more comfortable, and down the line you can build up to holding hands, hugging, and kissing. waaay easier than ending up on a date and making a huge move to kiss her. build up to it.
So once you've got a rapport with her and she's talking and laughing, you can ask her out. be specific, and don't make it a big deal. so not "Sooo... do you want to go out sometime?..." but something more like: "Hey, what are you doing Thursday? we should go to the mall." or "My buddy's got a pool party on Saturday night, you should come along. but you have to promise not to embarrass me".
It's better if you already know when she's free, or are talking about something she'd be interested in. "Well if you're free Friday, come and play some pool, I'll show you that trick shot I was telling you about."
if she says no, say "ok, next time then." it's not the end of the world unless you make it.
by the way, I'm making most of these quotes up as I go, change em as applicable to you. do something fun and active that you can do together, like shopping or walking your dog or throwing rocks at cars, not passive like a movie or show because you can't interact with each other doing that. and do something you'd enjoy doing anyway.
Hope that helps you out anyway, let us know how you go!
Relax!!!
(edit. ok, not ALL of the advice here is bad. Epitome and Random Argument Man make some good points. Confident and relaxed)
Listen I'm a chick and I no it's hard for you guys. But all you have to do is just slide your way into one conversation, agree with her,and smile. It works all the time. I went out with two guys cause they did that.
Just to add to this, if she does say she has a bf already, hide your sadness. But also ask about it, be like "Hey, that is sweet! What's his name? how'd you meet? ect." This shows that you are interested in her life still, and that you are not put off by her being around other guys. One of the biggest things girls in high school hate is when their bf is so protective of them when she talks to other guys; by showing you are interested, you come accross as being acceptant of this. With a little luck, and some more work, she could easily leave him for you. If not, you still have such a great friend, which is something you should hang on to.skywalkerlion said:This, always ask if she has a Boyfriend already. If she does, say casually 'OK' and hide your sadness as much as possibleGlefistus said:
I know, it's hard taking rejection. I take it to heart and personally as hell.
edit: Also, she could talk to her friends about how great you are. One thing leads to another and you fall for one of her friends and life goes on happily ever after.
I agreeKirbyEatsNeko said:
wanna go out?
yeah, I'll give credit where its due. takes balls though, and danger of social suicide. I fail to see the spontenaety of walking around all day with a message tattooed to your torso in case you run into herGHMonkey said:
try this:
have one of your friends bump into her and say "watch it *****" then when she gets pissed come over and tell him to fuck off and call him a dick and then instantly your into her world
you will owe your friend a favor (in my experience you doing the same thing to the girl he wants)but you got her
its a plan i came up with for a guy who wanted this one girl so bad but thought he could never get her so i did that to help him out usally it seems that if you are not good with women then this will help get you with her is what some people have told me after they tried it but ive never tried it personally (i dont really have problems with women)
good luck
have one of your friends bump into her and say "watch it *****" then when she gets pissed come over and tell him to fuck off and call him a dick and then instantly your into her world
you will owe your friend a favor (in my experience you doing the same thing to the girl he wants)but you got her
its a plan i came up with for a guy who wanted this one girl so bad but thought he could never get her so i did that to help him out usally it seems that if you are not good with women then this will help get you with her is what some people have told me after they tried it but ive never tried it personally (i dont really have problems with women)
good luck
Don't go straight from being a stranger to asking her on a date.
Become friends with her, have some conversations, find some mutual interests you can share and then invite her to attend an event relating to your interests some time.
If things go well, bam, girlfriend.
If things don't go well, so what? You've got some experience and you can try again with a different girl.
Also, you're a nerd yes, aren't we all? Girls are great, but their also terrifying right? Yeah. That doesn't matter, as long as you can start a conversation, you'll be fine. You'll lose the nerves quickly and have a wonderful time.
Good luck.
Become friends with her, have some conversations, find some mutual interests you can share and then invite her to attend an event relating to your interests some time.
If things go well, bam, girlfriend.
If things don't go well, so what? You've got some experience and you can try again with a different girl.
Also, you're a nerd yes, aren't we all? Girls are great, but their also terrifying right? Yeah. That doesn't matter, as long as you can start a conversation, you'll be fine. You'll lose the nerves quickly and have a wonderful time.
Good luck.
Sometimes, the simplest things work, my girlfriend actually asked me out, so i guess i got lucky, i won't lie and say i haven't asked out my fair of girls successfully though. It's best to remain calm when doing these things, don't go to the movies, not personal enough; don't act nervous around them, although some girls find that "cute", so, get to know her. Find out her interests and what you guys have in common and just act like a generally caring and likable person around them, you'd be surprised at how much girls will appreciate a down to earth guy they can talk to without involving sex or massive amounts of drama on a daily basis.
True story on both counts. How long have nerds been the new jocks anyway? To be honest I have never asked a girl out. What I would do I just hangout with them in school or out of school and just hit it off (this has worked for me three or four times). It's all about being confident. You have no idea how attractive confidence can make you seem. Do something together like star gazing (too bad you didn't say any of this a month ago. It would have been perfect for the Perseid meteor shower, my personal favorite. The Draconids are just around the corner but those are unreliable).DoW Lowen said:
Why do you like her?
You make it seem like you like her because she is pretty, and that you don't have a chance with her because you are a nerd. If you only like her for her looks and not because of her personality and interests I suggest moving on. Also, if you think being nerdy is something that would drive her away then that is even more reason to forget about her.
However if you must pursue her, (I know the feeling because I've been there too) then the keys are be confident and do something where you can get to know each other better (Bowling, MiniGolf, Museum, ComiCon). A movie is terrible because it isn't designed for talking.
You make it seem like you like her because she is pretty, and that you don't have a chance with her because you are a nerd. If you only like her for her looks and not because of her personality and interests I suggest moving on. Also, if you think being nerdy is something that would drive her away then that is even more reason to forget about her.
However if you must pursue her, (I know the feeling because I've been there too) then the keys are be confident and do something where you can get to know each other better (Bowling, MiniGolf, Museum, ComiCon). A movie is terrible because it isn't designed for talking.
Be yourself. It works even if you think it doesn't because if she rejects you, you know it wouldn't have worked out and you can go find someone else.
But more to the point, yeah just ask her out to some movie. Its simple, and you don't have to talk to her for the duration of it. No chance for screw-ups.
But more to the point, yeah just ask her out to some movie. Its simple, and you don't have to talk to her for the duration of it. No chance for screw-ups.
Typically cliche's become cliche's for a reason. They are used often. Why? Well in this case, because it works.Cortheya said:
Just remember that you are hot shit and would like to go to the movies with this girl. If you keep your confidence you should be fine. Just ask her if she want's to go to the movies sometime. This could also give you time to get a better gauge of who she is by asking her what movie she would like to see. Get out there and have fun man.