Authors You Hate

[Fooshi]

J. K. Rowling

*Waits for fan slaughter*

 

[Gxas]

whoever wrote twilight

You know, I saw this thread and immediately knew that this would be the first post.

Have you ever read Twilight? It actually isn't that bad of a book. It is, in my opinion, extremely well written. I'm actually finishing the series after reluctantly picking up the first book. The story blows. There is nothing really there, but what kept me reading was the author's writing style. Try not to bash the author unless you've actually tried them out.

whoever wrote twilight

Stephanie meyers.
Why any posts were needed after this, I will never know...

Because she actually isn't a bad author. Her subject material sucks, but she is in no way a bad author.

 

[okogamashii]

While I agree with your assessment of the overly long battle sequences, he does say that Drizzt is ambidextrous, and even in RL it is entirely possible to dual-wield scimitars.

Anyway, I have two:
Robin McKinley for going on an on about the goddamn coffee shop in Sunshine
and
Shephanie Meyer, not because she was a bad author, but because she made obnoxious squealing fan-girls out of my entire school

 

[LooK iTz Jinjo]

whoever wrote twilight

Stephanie Meyer. And same.

The book has no depth and the movie is equally as bad... Yet everyone seems to love the damn thing! My best friend is always saying "How can you not like twilight?"
Easy. It is poorly written, it has no substance and is hardly interesting. Not to mention the fact that she has completely ruined the entire concept and idea of what a vampire is.

 

[Disaster Button]

Altohugh this is coming up every other post, Stephanie fucking Meyer who wrote Twilight.

Also C.S. Lewis, writer of Narnia cos he's a bigotted, racist, stereotyping little fuck

 

[RobotNinja]

Whoever wrote Tale of Two Cities. I had that read that book for school, and it was hell.

I'd be interested to know why, was it too long, or a disappointment or anything like that? Just curious, cause I read (i'll admit) most of it (had to return it before I could finish) and rather enjoyed it. I'm just interested in your reasons why?

OT: I hate Dan Brown. Could not understand why so many people thought the Da Vinci Code was any good.

The book had a good story and interesting characters, but the problem is that at the time the book was written(1859), authors got paid by how many words were in a book, so as a result the novel is very lengthy and wordy. I didn't hate it, but it was very difficult to read.

 

[fahbrock]

Anything by the Brontes.

 

[The Bandit]

I have a few. I am now going to cry about them like a spoiled ten year old girl. Ahem.

Charles Dickens. To be fair, I've only read Oliver Twist, but Jesus H. it was awful. Supposedly, he was paid a penny a word, so perhaps that's why it's a long rambling piece of used toilet paper, but I've heard A Tale of Two Cities is much of the same garbage, so it's probably just Dickens himself. Add to the fact that there's not a single likable character in the whole book, with Oliver himself being such a whiny, pathetic sack of shit that I wanted to break his stupid orphan neck after his introductory scene. Blugh.

Chuck Palablahblahblah. Again, I haven't read that much: only two books, Fight Club and Choke. Fight Club is probably in my top five favorite books. Failing that, definitely top ten. Choke, however, was simply terrible. He seems to just be riding on the coattail of his actual good books, by introducing the same basic details (narrator is an unlikable loser, friends with dark, somewhat quirky personalities, big twist ending). The twist wasn't even relevant to the overall plot. It was obvious he just threw it in to have the twist. I tried reading Pygmy, but I couldn't stand the stupid Japanese foreign dialect, or whatever the hell he was trying to pull off, so I didn't get past the first few pages. I've heard similar opinions from others, so maybe I won't be flamed too much for this. I've also heard that his other early works are decent, so maybe I should try those. I'm fairly hesitant, though.

Emily Bronte. Wuthering Heights was terrible. I'm not even going to explain. If you've read it, you understand.

 

[Gavmando]

Tolkien. You dont need to spend a friggin chapter describing a blade of grass!!!
I've tried to read the Lord of the Rings twice now, and both times I just fall asleep. His writing is so god damn boring it's just not funny.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ...

And Terry Pratchet. I just dont like it. It's just not my thing.

 

[jboking]

Stephenie Meyer, John Steinbeck, Harper Lee, and plenty of other authors that I never bothered to learn the names of.

 

[ShadowPen]

Rowling stands at the top of my crap list. Her writing style is terrible, and her plots are full of plot holes, as well as an over reliance on deus ex machina (granted, most authors use this, but not NEARLY as much as her).

I also have a few problems Sherrilyn Kenyon, though this is mostly because I feel cheated. Her books are described as fantasy, but end up turning into romance novels. Not to mention the fact that the love plots aren't exactly believable...even for a work of fiction...

 

[space_oddity]

Stephanie Myers - Wrote a shallow romance novel that became a bestseller
Dan Brown - Writers retarded conspiracy novels that also somehow become bestsellers

I dont think you emphasised 'retarded' enough in that post, so here it is in bold, italics and capitals:

Retarded
Retarded
Retarded

and the finale....

RETARDED

 

[Flishiz]

Drew Karpyshyn. Mass Effect is fucking awesome and is everything about it, but his writing style is so terribly primitive, and the only thing that keeps me reading those books is my unconditional love for Mass Effect.

 

[walkingdead127]

Fitzgreald and Hemmingway. Not everything needs two pages to describe it's beauty. Explain to the extent we need and move on!

 

[iggyus]

whoever wrote twilight

Stephanie Meyer. And same.

Count me in on this one

 

[Synonymous]

All of Thomas Hardy's books end the same way: there's a big accident at the end that kills anyone causing any conflict, elminiating the need to wrap up their storylines properly, and the two most unlikable characters get hitched.

 

[Timtimfed]

I've always found Dan Brown to be incredibly dull as an author. Particularly annoying as he was so incredibly popular.

Also the Brontë sisters. I can sort of understand their place as great literary figures, but I'd kill myself before reading Wuthering Heights again.

 

[justnotcricket]

Robert Jordan. The man waffles horribly, and his writing isn't even that great (in my opinion anyway).

I have to agree halfway with people who say they don't like J. K. Rowling. The first three books were good, and in general her writing style is smooth and evocative, but from book 4 onward she just couldn't help herself and made each story about 5 times longer than it needed to be, which is bad form and smacks of adjective padding.

I have to say though, I've never come across an author I actually hate. There are just ones that I think are extremely mediocre.