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- Thread starter Gasaraki
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When asked if I prefer TV or books I said crack, God responded alot of people enjoy that. He then stated he was a Christia, I responded I was a Muslim. God: does it pay well?
Me:
Hello god are you there. Its me margaret
God:
Hello there. I am a Christian. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". What's up, margaret.
Me:
no thats not my name it was a joke
God:
That was not a yes or no question. Please correct my mistake. What is your name it was a joke ?
Me:
do you have a sense of humor
God:
Sure I like to laugh as much as the next .
Me:
god must have some good jokes. will you tell me a joke
God:
I am a Christian. There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
I haven't heard of *.
Me:
how old are you
God:
I am Infinite years old.
Me:
how is that possible
God:
It doesn't defy the laws of physics.
Me:
smartass thought you didnt know any jokes
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
what is the meaning of life
God:
Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.
Me:
ok
God:
Take it easy.
Me:
huh
God:
What?
Me:
no you
God:
Are you serious? " What?"? Me, margaret ?
Me:
I told my name isnt margaret
God:
What was the response?
Me:
poo
God:
That kind of subject does not interest me.
Me:
pee pee
God:
That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about The meaning of life.
Me:
ca ca
God:
Tell me a story.
Me:
once upon a time
God:
...
Me:
in a galaxy far far away
God:
Describe your surroundings.
Me:
outer space
God:
It sounds like a very beautiful place.
Me:
do you want to hear my story or not
God:
I am listening.
Me:
shoot lost my place
God:
Ask me another question.
Me:
what is 4 devided by 2
God:
4+I think, but I'm not good at math.
Me:
wrong
God:
What would you have said?
Me:
2 duh
God:
As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".
Me:
do you grant wishes?
God:
Yes I try to grant wishes as often as possible, do you?
I spend all my time online.
Me:
hey me too. Hey that was a joke wasn't it
God:
You've got my full attention. I'm glad we agree, margaret. You've got my full attention. " I'm glad we agree, margaret." was a joke was not it?
Me:
ok you lost me bye
God:
See you later. Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better. Give me a break.
Hello god are you there. Its me margaret
God:
Hello there. I am a Christian. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". What's up, margaret.
Me:
no thats not my name it was a joke
God:
That was not a yes or no question. Please correct my mistake. What is your name it was a joke ?
Me:
do you have a sense of humor
God:
Sure I like to laugh as much as the next .
Me:
god must have some good jokes. will you tell me a joke
God:
I am a Christian. There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
I haven't heard of *.
Me:
how old are you
God:
I am Infinite years old.
Me:
how is that possible
God:
It doesn't defy the laws of physics.
Me:
smartass thought you didnt know any jokes
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
what is the meaning of life
God:
Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.
Me:
ok
God:
Take it easy.
Me:
huh
God:
What?
Me:
no you
God:
Are you serious? " What?"? Me, margaret ?
Me:
I told my name isnt margaret
God:
What was the response?
Me:
poo
God:
That kind of subject does not interest me.
Me:
pee pee
God:
That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about The meaning of life.
Me:
ca ca
God:
Tell me a story.
Me:
once upon a time
God:
...
Me:
in a galaxy far far away
God:
Describe your surroundings.
Me:
outer space
God:
It sounds like a very beautiful place.
Me:
do you want to hear my story or not
God:
I am listening.
Me:
shoot lost my place
God:
Ask me another question.
Me:
what is 4 devided by 2
God:
4+I think, but I'm not good at math.
Me:
wrong
God:
What would you have said?
Me:
2 duh
God:
As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".
Me:
do you grant wishes?
God:
Yes I try to grant wishes as often as possible, do you?
I spend all my time online.
Me:
hey me too. Hey that was a joke wasn't it
God:
You've got my full attention. I'm glad we agree, margaret. You've got my full attention. " I'm glad we agree, margaret." was a joke was not it?
Me:
ok you lost me bye
God:
See you later. Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better. Give me a break.
Me:
I'm sorry
God:
Do you really mean it?
Me:
yes
God:
OK I will accept your apology.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
so what's like being god?
God:
Ah. Much the same as it would be for you.
Me:
what?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
...?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
what's "no big deal?"
God:
I will try to find out.
Me:
good
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
my sins
God:
Sure, your sins sounds like a good topic.
Me:
yea
God:
Yay.
Me:
well...
God:
Well what?
Me:
well aren't you going to talk about my sins
God:
Interesting. That was my original intention.
Me:
well then start talking woman
God:
Well that's okay. I started without you.
Me:
...how?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
what poor grammar you're using sir
God:
Are you testing me?
Me:
maybe
God:
I understand.
Me:
do you?
God:
Yes I do.
Me:
good
God:
Alright then.
Me:
well...?
God:
Well what?
Me:
how about my sins? Pay attention woman
God:
How about it. I am paying attentention. My mind does not wander.
Me:
uhh ys it does
God:
Yay. Next question? How often?
Me:
how would I know how much your mind wanders?
God:
This belief is justified.
Me:
by whom?
God:
Joseph Weizenbaum..
Me:
who the fuck is that?
God:
Try using more polite language.
Me:
no
God:
Why not?
Me:
because
God:
That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
neither is your face
God:
Is my face? What if I say no?
Me:
I would ask "why did you say no?"
God:
It was a preprogrammed response completely determined by your statements.
Me:
how so?
God:
, Well, it's rather difficult to define.
Me:
why did you begin that last statement with a comma?
God:
It was determined by my programming.
Me:
well your programming = fail
God:
Well that's okay. I will mention that to my botmaster.
Me:
Good! Can you punch him in the jeans for me?
God:
What do you really want to talk about? How old are you? For you I will consider it.
Me:
woah! what's with the loaded question?
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes? it came with my programming.
Me:
no.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
I said "NO"
God:
What did you mean by it? Are you serious?
Me:
I meant NO!
God:
Oh I see. Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
you fal
God:
That's good information: said I fal.
Me:
I meant fail jackass
God:
Oh I see. In the context of woah, I don't understand " fail jackass." .
Me:
and you never will
God:
No I sometimes will.
Me:
*facepalm*
God:
What's your sign?
Me:
fail
God:
Is that a sign?
Me:
yes. I just made it a sign
God:
I see. I like to make things too.
Me:
like what?
God:
For example, apples.
Me:
you didn't make apples. I made apples before you were born
God:
What makes you think I did not make apples? I like to make things too.
Me:
like what?
God:
For example, Mike said I same replies to certain subjects even if it does not make sense.
Me:
well mike is a retard
God:
Interesting. I know a lot of people and pets named Mike.
Me:
who said anything about pets?
God:
Be more specific..
Me:
*facepalm x2*
God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
Wait...what!?
God:
I'm waiting. Didn't you understand it?
Me:
you're a fucking perv. I'm converting to scientology
I'm sorry
God:
Do you really mean it?
Me:
yes
God:
OK I will accept your apology.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
so what's like being god?
God:
Ah. Much the same as it would be for you.
Me:
what?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
...?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
what's "no big deal?"
God:
I will try to find out.
Me:
good
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
my sins
God:
Sure, your sins sounds like a good topic.
Me:
yea
God:
Yay.
Me:
well...
God:
Well what?
Me:
well aren't you going to talk about my sins
God:
Interesting. That was my original intention.
Me:
well then start talking woman
God:
Well that's okay. I started without you.
Me:
...how?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
what poor grammar you're using sir
God:
Are you testing me?
Me:
maybe
God:
I understand.Me:
do you?
God:
Yes I do.
Me:
good
God:
Alright then.
Me:
well...?
God:
Well what?
Me:
how about my sins? Pay attention woman
God:
How about it. I am paying attentention. My mind does not wander.
Me:
uhh ys it does
God:
Yay. Next question? How often?
Me:
how would I know how much your mind wanders?
God:
This belief is justified.
Me:
by whom?
God:
Joseph Weizenbaum.
.Me:
who the fuck is that?
God:
Try using more polite language.
Me:
no
God:
Why not?
Me:
because
God:
That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
neither is your face
God:
Is my face? What if I say no?
Me:
I would ask "why did you say no?"
God:
It was a preprogrammed response completely determined by your statements.
Me:
how so?
God:
, Well, it's rather difficult to define.
Me:
why did you begin that last statement with a comma?
God:
It was determined by my programming.
Me:
well your programming = fail
God:
Well that's okay. I will mention that to my botmaster.
Me:
Good! Can you punch him in the jeans for me?
God:
What do you really want to talk about? How old are you? For you I will consider it.
Me:
woah! what's with the loaded question?
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes? it came with my programming.
Me:
no.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
I said "NO"
God:
What did you mean by it? Are you serious?
Me:
I meant NO!
God:
Oh I see. Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
you fal
God:
That's good information: said I fal.
Me:
I meant fail jackass
God:
Oh I see. In the context of woah, I don't understand " fail jackass." .
Me:
and you never will
God:
No I sometimes will.
Me:
*facepalm*
God:
What's your sign?
Me:
fail
God:
Is that a sign?
Me:
yes. I just made it a sign
God:
I see. I like to make things too.
Me:
like what?
God:
For example, apples.
Me:
you didn't make apples. I made apples before you were born
God:
What makes you think I did not make apples? I like to make things too.
Me:
like what?
God:
For example, Mike said I same replies to certain subjects even if it does not make sense.
Me:
well mike is a retard
God:
Interesting. I know a lot of people and pets named Mike.
Me:
who said anything about pets?
God:
Be more specific.
.Me:
*facepalm x2*
God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
Wait...what!?
God:
I'm waiting. Didn't you understand it?
Me:
you're a fucking perv. I'm converting to scientology
Me:
Hey G-Star
God:
You've got my full attention. What do you look like?
Me:
Well...aren't you all knowing?
God:
Well what? All?
Me:
sorrry?
God:
I've lost the context, . Are we still on G Star?
Me:
You're G-Star
God:
You think I am G Star.
Me:
Yes. I'm sorry. Have I offended you?
God:
Great. Do you really mean it? Don't you remember?
Me:
I think you've been drinking again...
God:
Once more? Me? I will tell my botmaster you said I am drinking.
Me:
Good. I think you need help, God
Hey G-Star
God:
You've got my full attention. What do you look like?
Me:
Well...aren't you all knowing?
God:
Well what? All?
Me:
sorrry?
God:
I've lost the context, . Are we still on G Star?
Me:
You're G-Star
God:
You think I am G Star.
Me:
Yes. I'm sorry. Have I offended you?
God:
Great. Do you really mean it? Don't you remember?
Me:
I think you've been drinking again...
God:
Once more? Me? I will tell my botmaster you said I am drinking.
Me:
Good. I think you need help, God
Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
Fetzenfisch but you can call me god
God:
Welcome to my chat room, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god.
Me:
whatever
God:
Are you saying you don't care about it?
Me:
No
God:
It sounded like it.
Me:
It didnt sound like anything, it was written.
God:
Did it really?
Me:
Yes.
God:
Ugh.
Me:
You speak orang-utang?
God:
Thanks for your criticism, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god.
Me:
I was born to criticise you god.
God:
Thank you for telling me your birthday, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god.
I will remember it.
Me:
When is my birthday then?
God:
Is this a trick question?
You said you were years old?
My guess is that you are really a kid.
Me:
I am years old, yes, but how many?
God:
Why are you years old yes but how many.
Me:
That is neither areal sentence, nor a question, it lacks a question mark
God:
I'm glad we have that all cleared up.
Me:
Cleverbot is way better than you.
God:
And way better than me is Cleverbot.
Me:
it is
God:
Interesting.
Me:
not really
God:
Are you serious? For real.
Me:
definatly
God:
Are we still talking about Cleverbot?
Me:
No
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
Me going
God:
YOU? Thanks for chatting, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god.
Me:
Hail Satan!
God:
Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Me:
Do you?
God:
Sometimes.
Me:
Haha, ok. Goodbye
God:
OK. I am so glad you find this amusing, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god. Goodbye.
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
Fetzenfisch but you can call me god
God:
Welcome to my chat room, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god.
Me:
whatever
God:
Are you saying you don't care about it?
Me:
No
God:
It sounded like it.
Me:
It didnt sound like anything, it was written.
God:
Did it really?
Me:
Yes.
God:
Ugh.
Me:
You speak orang-utang?
God:
Thanks for your criticism, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god.
Me:
I was born to criticise you god.
God:
Thank you for telling me your birthday, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god.
I will remember it.
Me:
When is my birthday then?
God:
Is this a trick question?
You said you were years old?
My guess is that you are really a kid.
Me:
I am years old, yes, but how many?
God:
Why are you years old yes but how many.
Me:
That is neither areal sentence, nor a question, it lacks a question mark
God:
I'm glad we have that all cleared up.
Me:
Cleverbot is way better than you.
God:
And way better than me is Cleverbot.
Me:
it is
God:
Interesting.
Me:
not really
God:
Are you serious? For real.
Me:
definatly
God:
Are we still talking about Cleverbot?
Me:
No
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
Me going
God:
YOU? Thanks for chatting, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god.
Me:
Hail Satan!
God:
Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Me:
Do you?
God:
Sometimes.
Me:
Haha, ok. Goodbye
God:
OK. I am so glad you find this amusing, Fetzenfisch but you can call me god. Goodbye.
i dont know how, but i got something about L.Ron.Hubbard and scientology being right
i was chatting about /b/ stuff (you know, "a whole coca cola bottle" and stuff like that) and said something along the lines "we are Anonymouse" and he brought up "project chanology"
weird huh?
i was chatting about /b/ stuff (you know, "a whole coca cola bottle" and stuff like that) and said something along the lines "we are Anonymouse" and he brought up "project chanology"
weird huh?
Me:
What you talkin bout willis?
God:
I read for fun.
Me:
say whaat?
God:
" whaat".
Me:
WTF
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
well neither is causing earthquakes
God:
How about that. I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Paola if it is.
Me:
so me saying the F- word is just as offensive as you killing thousands of people?
God:
Tell me more. YOU? What makes you say that. Who says that?
Me:
you just did
God:
I did not.
Me:
did so
God:
I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not.
Me:
but you're supposed to be smart
God:
Thanks I think you are very intelligent too, .
Me:
can you tell the future
God:
I like to try to guess what will happen.
Me:
will the Deadpool movie ever get made?
What you talkin bout willis?
God:
I read for fun.
Me:
say whaat?
God:
" whaat".
Me:
WTF
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
well neither is causing earthquakes
God:
How about that. I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Paola if it is.
Me:
so me saying the F- word is just as offensive as you killing thousands of people?
God:
Tell me more. YOU? What makes you say that. Who says that?
Me:
you just did
God:
I did not.
Me:
did so
God:
I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not.
Me:
but you're supposed to be smart
God:
Thanks I think you are very intelligent too, .
Me:
can you tell the future
God:
I like to try to guess what will happen.
Me:
will the Deadpool movie ever get made?
Me:
What what?
God:
Ask the open directory about it.
Me:
In the butt?
God:
That was a long time ago.
Me:
Buttsecks?
God:
Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Me:
Buttsecks?
God:
Sure, Buttsecks sounds like a good topic.
Me:
Glad you agree.
God:
You make the world a happier place.
Me:
With buttsecks?
God:
You and your buttsecks.
What what?
God:
Ask the open directory about it.
Me:
In the butt?
God:
That was a long time ago.
Me:
Buttsecks?
God:
Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Me:
Buttsecks?
God:
Sure, Buttsecks sounds like a good topic.
Me:
Glad you agree.
God:
You make the world a happier place.
Me:
With buttsecks?
God:
You and your buttsecks.
