Books you would hate to see turned into a movie

[Falseprophet]

There's a few recent sci-fi novels that deal with the logical results of transhumanism. Like Cory Doctorow's Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom or Walter Jon Williams Implied Spaces. Hollywood can't seem to portray transhumanism as anything other than evil, so I wouldn't trust them to get it right.

Also Slaughterhouse 5. It wouldn't make sense as a film and people who haven't read the book would probably criticise it too much for being 'random'

Actually, there is a film adaptation [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0069280/]. And it's pretty faithful to the book. Not perfect, but pretty good. It helps that it was made in the 70s--no one could make that movie today.

Since they already made Lord of the Rings, I'll say Earthsea. Since it is a multiethnic fantasy world, Hollywood would just make everyone white.

(Sigh) They did. Ursula LeGuin was not amused [http://www.slate.com/id/2111107/].

Lord of the Flies.

A little late. Already been done.
Haven't seen it.
Awesome book though!

The 1963 black and white version is pretty close to the book, although the handful of props and effects they use look really cheap by today's standards. I've never seen the 1990 version.

 

[azurawolf]

Also... please keep Twilight bashing to a minimum because I know it is going to happen...
That is not the purpose of this thread.

FUCK!
Thats what I was going to do before the thread even loaded!
Well then, Mein Kampf mabey.

What can I say. I'm a mindreader.

Why wont you let us bash twilight!? WHYYY!?

Its getting very annoying. No... I am not a fangirl of the books/movies but it gets annoying hearing people bashing about it as much as hearing people saying how hot Edward is.

Definitely Ender's Game. I love the book to death, and it's actually my favorite, but nearly the whole book is narrative. Not even close to enough dialogue.

Yes. That book is amazing without having a movie ruin it.
Some parts would probably get torn out which would be horrible.

 

[kintaris]

...I could see Steven Speilberg maybe making something okay out of it, and I don't generally like Speilberg. It just seems like the kind of film he could do quite well. Problem is, there isn't anyone who could write a script for it that would work.

I'll second that, he'd have the right attitude to the mood and the tone of Murakami. But its just finding a scriptwriter who could handle the sheer...weight, I guess, of it. I've talk to a few of my colleagues about it before and none of them would even dream of it, despite all being fans and not shy of a challenge.

 

[Arcanite Ripper]

The Dictionary.

It would be just awful...

 

[Matt-the-twat]

Definitely Ender's Game. I love the book to death, and it's actually my favorite, but nearly the whole book is narrative. Not even close to enough dialogue.

Orson Scott Card has actually written the screenplay and is pursuing reluctant film companies with worrying persistence. I also see that there is an Xbox Live game in the rumour mill? I'm learning lots today...

OT: I change my answer. Jasper Fforde's books. But I'm safe there because translating his books into film would not only be utterly redundant (books about books: The Film) but also literally impossible.

Have to say the Ender saga, that would be horrible turned into a film or a series of films.

 

[unicornninja]

The Redwall series by Brian Jacques. Wikipedia said it was made into an animated series but I don NOT want this to be a movie. If they were to make it into a movie I would kill someone if they made it live action. But they are really good books I recommend them but the chronological order is kinda hard to figure out. If you want to get into them I think Lord Brocktree comes first (maybe not?). I dont want to see a Redwall movie though it would be awful.

 

[kintaris]

...Skulduggery Pleasant) could be utterly fantastic.

I think it could be pretty damn good in the right hands. But it's a case of finding those hands.

I've tried to adapt a few of the ones you've mentioned myself, as sort of half-serious side projects to keep my creative juices flowing between my proper work. But it is damn hard work, really really challenging, and in the end everyone visualises books in a different way so someone - and probably the majority of people - are bound to be disappointed.

 

[Bilbo536]

Lord of the Flies.

The Oxford English Dictionary.

Way too long, too many characters with cameos and you just know Zythum will end up being the bad guy.

Touche...

Lord of the Flies actually has been made into a movie. It was pretty shit.

 

[shufflemonkey16]

The Giver.
A lot of the book is based on the fact that the characters perceive the world differently than we do but the reader doesn't realize this until a third of the way through when the main character is confused by seeing color and is unable to describe it. Even then it's pretty much impossible to figure out until someone tells him "you saw the color red." I don't know how things like that could be achieved through a movie.

 

[Z(ombie)fan]

THE CONQUEROR WORMS. but only if its made really soon

the book is a batshit insane masterpiece. Im not saying it couldn't work, just that I would prefer the movie being made by some one like... me.

seriously though, HP lovecrafts stuff. if only because nobody can do it right.

 

[Mr.Napier]

The Dresden Files,Codex Alera, The Seventh Tower, any of the books by Christopher Moore, and books based on movies. I know that last one is weird but I live in America and honestly I think that the day will come when we make movies off books that were based on movies simply because it seems to be the next logical step in the money making process.

 

[SteinFaust]

i want to see Grey Knights by Ben Counter.

directed by Neil Blomkamp(sp?) and starring Gerard Butler as Justicar Alaric.


EDIT oh wait-- you said hate....? whoops.

um okay then, the hobbit directed by Uwe Boll, starring zack efron.

 

[coldshadow]

lord of the flies...o wait

 

[bak00777]

i would say the Cirque Du Freak series, but unfortunatly they allrdy made a piece of crap film.

 

[Declaro]

At the risk of sounding illiterate (I'm not! Really! I just like old books that were made into movies like 60 years ago!), I'll throw in some comic books:

The Sandman. All I can see is someone chopping out all the stories that don't have Morpheus as a main focus, which, honestly, would drive me insane as he gets a little too Byronic hero for my tastes and I can just see someone making him way too melodramatic.

(Already happened but...Constantine. The less said about that movie, the better. I die a little inside every time someone tells me they liked it.)

 

[Gabanuka]

Eldest.

Dont ruin another one for me!

 

[Arsen]

The Dark Tower series
Anything from Lovecraft. It would be a monster film with guns. There would be nothing subtle and it would bring in a thousand "BOO!" moments. And I do not want a CGI Cthulhu.
Anything by Ray Bradbury, Poe, Milton, etc.

Don't ruin something good by bringing out in today's day and age. Modern society has issues that need to be worked out.

 

[Assassin Xaero]

The Stand... oh wait... uhh...