"Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present; Man Not Caring. Hum."
-Dr. Perry Cox, Scrubs
"Time for some thrilling heroics."
-Jayne Cobb, Firefly
"If you take sexual advantage of her, you are going to burn in a very special level of Hell. A level they reserve for child molesters; and people who talk at the theatre."
-Shepherd Book, Firefly
"Cut her down."
"But the girl is a witch"
"Yeah, but she's our witch. So cut her the hell down"
- Capt. Malcolm Reynolds negotiating a Witch-Burning, Firefly
"A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults"
- Louis Nizer
"Don't ask the barber whether you need a haircut"
- Anon.
Personal Favourite
"I'm the Dude."
- Jeff "The Dude" Lebowski, The Big Lebowski
And I have many more favourites (no more Firefly ones, I promise) which can be found here:
http://thinks.com/words/aphorisms.htm
and here:
http://members.dca.net/leipold/ap_ap.html