College seems lonely...

[szs0061]

youv'e pretty much described my college experience so far man im hoping it get better too

 

[Unesh52]

Start having sex.

Odd way to meet someone.

"Hello, what's your name?"

"No names, take off your pants."

I know that all to well, even if me and another person do 'hit it off', unless they blatantly show it I will stay away from them for fear of imposing incase I've made a less than desirable impression on them as you've said. I can only assume that others do so similarly, which ends up with a whole lot of people staying the hell away from each other and not really talking.

Exactly. I've often noticed something like this happening.

No, MY post was idiotic. Sorry for the confusion. Just always wanted to know about the structure of a college, and it appears trivial to anyone who is at college

Oh! Right, yes, obviously. I think I need to get off the computer for a while and rest.

I hope the other posts have helped with your question, but like I said, it's kind of vague.

 

[Estocavio]

Lie, and pretend to love nature or something.
In all seriousness, just pretend to be someone your not.

 

[Delock]

Try to go out with your roommates, there's nothing wrong with being friends with them. Also I found that a good way to meet new people is to bum a cigarette off people outside your dorm (if you smoke cigarettes ever, that is).

That or be Lighter Man! With the power to produce fire at any time!

Seriously, it really is sort of hard at first, but just keep talking to people. When you make one friend, you'll often be invited into that friend's social circle and make more there. More often than not, it's easiest for this to happen with your roommates.

 

[SimuLord]

If Georgia State's full of frat boys and slutty sorority girls and you can't find anyone to relate to, you may want to consider changing schools---there are academic schools and party schools and it sounds like GSU might be the latter.

I'm at Nevada (go Wolf Pack!) and I've found friendships easy to come by because there are enough people on campus (especially in the College of Business) who gravitate toward clever students who know their way around classroom material. Sure, there are a bunch of blockheads, but any cross-section of young people (or in my case old farts) will have its share of those.

I was thinking about changing anyway in a year or two, but the school I had in mind might even be worse off in that respect. More importantly, do you have a rat on your shoulder?

That would be Buster. Best pet EVER.

 

[Mr.logic]

my first day at college starts tomorrow so I'll let you know =D

 

[Sneaky-Pie]

"Loneliness is a gift we can give or take away forever..." [/yes]

It's like this for everyone. Once you get more involved with your classes things become much easier. Just strike up a conversation with whomever you happen to sit next to, ask your dorm mates what home is like, etc.

In less than a month, everything will be peachy.

 

[Unesh52]

my first day at college starts tomorrow so I'll let you know =D

You should do that

 

[Gralian]

I ended up making friends because myself and a bunch of other people were a bit lost in the freshers week and we all ended up accidentally bunking a test... so we spent the hour milling about campus killing time and ended up chatting and became mates, then you get friends through their friends and... you get the idea.

Though i'm a video game nut i didn't let that on as much as i otherwise would have done to someone i know enjoys game. I know a couple of them liked games but only as a very casual thing. Conversations revolved around life at uni and what was on the telly and other broad interests, funny comedians and stuff like that. You get the idea.

The point is don't go in expecting everyone to be sanguine about your passion for your hobbies. Try to be broad and general and inquire about what they like to do for fun and their life and stuff, like if they have been in the army or what nationality they are. (Uni seems to be full of foreign students so its a good place to mesh with other cultures and such). Find common ground like if you go to the same lecture and talk about it. Just relax, be cool and be confident because people find that to be less threatening and more approachable. Instead of sitting by yourself for example next time just go sit next to anybody and throw them a friendly smile and a "Hi there" - you'd be surprised, it goes a long way to getting people to relax around you.

 

[curty129]

Just needing a little clarity on this whole 'college' experience. (Sorry, I know a lot of this has been answered in other posts, I'd just prefer some personalised advice.)

So, erm. I'll start with this; I haven't spoken to a friend nor left my house for a social meeting since the day I broke up for the summer holidays, which means I'll be starting from scratch; it's unlikely I'll meet any old friends in the classes I'll be taking, when in college.
I'm not completely socially incompetent (Evidence suggests otherwise, eh? ) but I'm wondering if there's nearly always a social circle for any 'class' (Nerds, jocks, non-stereotypical groups etc.) of people, or if it's more likely that I'd meet up with new people and that we'll all come together to form our own sort of social 'group'. (God knows what that'd be, if we're all similar)

Also, just go to any ol' party, regardless of the fact that I've never been to one? Would it be best to wait until I could go with a friend, or go anyway? Also, what's the general 'activity' in a party, assuming there's alcohol. I've never really understood.. Do you meet a stranger, talk to them while drinking..? And about what, exactly? General everyday stuff such as the courses they'd be taking etc.? I can't see that fitting the situation well "So what's your main interest?" "Shee that gurl dere..? I to-ally fucked her." "So.. you're here for sex education..?"
I suppose I should turn up a little later, once people have gotten at least tipsy, get drunk meself and 'go with it'?

What to do during lunch breaks? Go to a .. Fff. 'Specified social area': where ya'd all just group together the first time and split off when you meet someone you click with, or would it be best to wait it out in my classes until I find someone I befriend and then 'tag along' (Not in a creepy, irritating way ;P But how else can it be said) as they hang out with their own group of friends?

Any other general tips? (Excluding the obvious 'Throw myself into all opportunities', 'join a club, regardless', and 'be myself'.)

Edit: In return for advice, I shall link you a funny photo.

 

[SturmDolch]

I started University one year ago. I live in the same city, so I don't live there and I guess I miss out on things because of that. But even so, I haven't made a single new friend apart from old friends of friends I've been introduced to. I'm stuck with my high school group. Not that it's bad, but I'd love to meet people taking the same classes as me. But friendships in class never seem to last outside of class. It sucks really.

It would suck if I didn't know people. I guess if I lived on campus, I'd join a couple clubs that interest me. I'm sure there's some sort of video game club at your uni, or a computer science club.

 

[Acier]

Holy Shit! I'm at Emory! *high fives*

Anyways, join clubs, be assertive when introducing yourself in the dining hall etc etc. I'm still trying to find my friends too as we started on the 18th, I'm finally starting to make some headway. Good Luck

 

[Plurralbles]

dude, I had all of 11 friends during last school year. Basically, I was saved by Human V Zombies, my floormates, Engineering group thing, a religion group,and Dungeons and Dragons. I really didn't do much. DIdn't go to any parties really... But I never felt lonely. There's always SOMEONE that you can hang otu with on your floor. Hell, just saying hi as you pass someone studying can do wonders. hell, it's easy to make a friend in the first week by going around and going into open dorms and saying hi to that resident. Bring a friend though or you might be a, "creeper". haha. Laundry Day is a great day to meet people. Then you have classes, but I only really got to know one person during a class. Sure, hot as hell, but do I have her number? Was I able to tap that? No. No siree. nah, she just had to be a COMMUTER! ARRRGGHG! : )

 

[Lyri]

Your identity isn't video games.

I think this is the soundest piece of advice that anyone could ever have given you.

You don't have to look for people who play video games, like anime, metal music. Sure it'd be nice but hey, step out of your comfort zone every once in a while and open your doors to a new experience or two.

Some guys you know are going to play soccer invite you along?
Go for it, don't forget to mention that you're probably going to suck horribly at it but it should be a good laugh for the rest of them.

Just roll with whatever happens man, no offence but sticking to such a barrier is probably why you feel so lonely.
Unfortunately the rest of the word doesn't share the same hobbies and interests as we do sometimes, so we have to accommodate it just like they do when we go on about our fandoms.

 

[Mimssy]

It takes more than a week to make friends. I met the friends I still hang out with (and a few I live with) a month or more into the school year. Just try your best to be friendly and go to events that are aimed at a certain crowd (The College of Technology at my school has a gaming event which is a great place to meet people).

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

I suspect I'll be fairly lonely when I start University but I'm sure I'll make friends as I'm finally going to a school that teaches what I am interested in. Odds are that there are people there who also share my interests and want to make friends.

I'm sure, with time, you'll bump into another person such as yourself.

 

[runnernda]

Believe me, dear, it'll get better. Usually you'll find people in classes or clubs. I had a pretty easy time of it, since I ran cross-country and track, and I had to get there a week earlier than everyone else for preseason. I had a group of friends before most of the freshmen even got there. But just talk to people. I know you might feel a little desperate doing this, but ask your roommates if you can tag along with them to parties. I did that for the first few weeks. It might take some time, but you will make friends. That's the good thing about college; all sorts of people are there. You just haven't run into your people yet.

 

[presidentjlh]

Yeah, my freshman year was pretty awful. I'm a mix of the sports guy and the gamer. I lived in a dorm and never really knew about anything that was going on. Sucked.

I joined a frat over the summer, and I've been to a few parties already since Thursday. Now, if it doesn't interest you, you don't have to, but you could give a fraternity a try.

In addition, I'm also fairly involved with some clubs, as well as my campus parish. I'm Vice-President of the Pre-Law Club and a member of the College Republicans. Trust me, there's tons of people like you out there, you just don't know it yet. Try joining clubs that share your interests, and you'll find some good friends.

 

[Hollyosaur]

Sweetie, I wont worry too much about it. It's normal to feel like that. It'll pass.

As for your insecurities; treat it like a new start! It is. Trust me, I was like that last year. You'll be fine.

Also, feel free to private mail me if you want

xx

That about sums it up. Except I would've been more sarcastic about it

You are right about things getting easier once class starts though. Especially if they're classes you enjoy, because just about everything in college is a choice, you'll find like-minded people.
Also it's generally easier to introduce yourself to people who you know the name of, and that usually gets brought up in class. (At least, that's how it works for me.)

The hardest part is putting yourself out there, but once you do, you may find you become friends with people you would never have thought you would be friends with.

Also, don't get discouraged if it takes a while to make friends. Took me about half a semester, maybe 3/4 of a semester to start making a lot of friends.

I wasn't being sarcastic about it. Sorry if it came across that way. I was genuinely trying to help.

But I agree with your advice

Oh, no I wasn't implying that. I was saying that I would have been sarcastic instead of nice about it. I was just joking around. Sorry for the misunderstanding.

Sorry. I was reading it late last night. It's cool XDD It was my fault in the first place!