Corrupt a Wish game

[DeathChairOfHell]

granted. but he locks them in his cellar and doesn't let anyone see them.

i wish for my own candy store!

 

[blankedboy]

Granted, but the candy has cocaine in it.

I wish I could create universes and define what goes on inside them!

 

[DeathChairOfHell]

granted. but as soon as there is intelligent life you will be destroyed by your very own creations.

i wish that i was the immortal president of the world forever.

 

[blankedboy]

Wait, that doesn't make sense. I DEFINE what goes on inside them.

Anyways.

Granted, but the sun explodes, destroying all planets in the solar system along with all the life on earth and you're left in the yawning void of space for a fuckin' long time.
Undying.

I wish that I was made of jelly.
(this should be interesting)

 

[DeathChairOfHell]

granted. but suddenly three schoolbusses of kids stop at you and eat you up.


i wish that my head exploded.

 

[Crayzor]

Granted, but it doesn't kill you and you feel all the pain, before regrowing a head half the size.

I wish to be aweseome.

 

[blankedboy]

Granted, but so is everyone else and you become insignificant again.

I wish to have a black lightsaber.

 

[BrailleOperatic]

Granted. But it's so dark, your eyes can't see it anymore.

I wish I had better drawing skills.

 

[Hana_aoki]

Granted, but your better skills cause hordes of creepy fangirls to beg you to draw out their fanfic stories... in detail

I wish it rained more often.

 

[Scde2]

Granted, there is now a serial killer who kidnaps boys and puts them in a well until they drown.

I wish that people were nicer to emos.

 

[BrailleOperatic]

Granted, but the new found acceptance completely demeans the purpose of being emo and they all subsequently turn into quote-unquote "normal" people.

I wish I was a Bond villain.

 

[Scde2]

Granted, the movie is put on hold due to lack of money.

I wish I had 25000 more posts.

 

[blankedboy]

Granted, but posts no longer show on the Escapist.

I wish I had some sushi.

 

[Hana_aoki]

Granted, but it's rotted and poisonous.

I wish that I was less afraid of spiders.

 

[MachoFern]

Granted, you are afraid of air now

I wish I could think of a cheesy pun

 

[BrailleOperatic]

Granted, and it's a gouda one.

I wish I hadn't said that...

 

[MachoFern]

I would give you that wish but it would involve me warping back in time and murdering you with a cleaver on your way to your computer

I wish the PS3 played PS2 games

 

[Blue Musician]

Granted, but you PS3 gets corrupter 1 hours after this wish is granted.

I wish I had a scythe.

 

[Xpwn3ntial]

Granted, but if you touch it you die.

I wish I had unrestricted access to anywhere in the world

 

[Hussmann54]

Granted, but nobody wants you near them.

I wanna be able to teleport ALA Nightcrawler