To everyone still posting about their dislike of Final Fantasy VII: You've won.
Fifteen years. Wow, that's a long time. In fact, I never would have guessed all those years ago, but it's finally happened: everyone, everywhere, fan or critic, is sick to death of every last word spoken about the landmark Square Co. release, Final Fantasy VII. To everyone still nonchalantly mentioning how they never cared for it, I, though I bear no official designation and have no real authority with which to do so, have declared this conflict over. You have won, decisively, and I extend my most earnest thanks.
I honestly don't know how the game managed to garner this kind of attention. With almost every game released, popular or unpopular, divisive or inoffensive, the reaction is always predictable: the people that disliked it will voice their displeasure for a time, and then life happens. Other games come along, some of which they may even enjoy. Time passes. Usually less than fifteen frickin' years. The people that enjoyed it will talk about it for awhile, and then the same fading occurs. Years later, some of them will say, "Remember that thing we liked? We liked that thing. Aaaahh." And then? Silence. This is the normal reaction. But you have defied this pattern magnificently.
As time wore on, it seemed like discussion of FFVII just never wound down. Oh, it faded, sure, but it was always- and still is- around the fringes. This isn't unheard of; plenty of great games remain talked about more than a decade after everyone normal has packed up and moved on, but in all of these cases it's by people who enjoyed the games, and then only for games of legendary quality. But I honestly can't remember the last time anyone brought up Final Fantasy VII for any reason other than to make snide, petty comments about how its best attempts couldn't impress them, a fact so many remain so proud of even fifteen years later- and, I really can't stress enough, fifteen years is a damned eternity in videogame years.
This puzzled and even angered me at first. After I got out of... really? Elementary school? Jesus, that was a long time ago... Anyway, after I got older and began to make a productive and well-adjusted person of myself (what with finishing school and starting a career, I hardly even have the time to play video games anymore), I just couldn't fathom how so many would remain so persistently and vocally indifferent about something ultimately not worth making a big deal over; it just seemed obsessive and pointless to me at the time. But now, I ask myself, have I ever felt as strongly as these people must? Is there any single project in my life that I have voluntarily devoted a decade and a half to? And I must admit that this is a devotion I lack.
You were up against a lot. Final Fantasy VII was a title that, to my memory (which might be unreliable since this was like, seriously, a long damn time ago) was loved by practically everyone on release and has received numerous awards and consistently graced innumerable "Best Ever" lists ever since. The fans- myself included- were an enthusiastic and vocal bunch. I admit, the very mention of the title once brought me genuine pleasure. It must have been sickening to you people- or I'd think so if you hadn't all taken almost three fourths of my lifespan to assert that you really don't care all that much. But those days are all long gone. Thanks, really; it's touching. I still remember the day all affection for that game was finally suffocated out of me, because, rather than involve myself in a purposeless and redundant discussion of the game, I just said, "It's been a decade. It's time to let go." Yes, a decade- because that point was five years ago.
After that, the universally unwanted specter of people who really must have been powerfully unimpressed by FFVII seemed even more petty and superfluous; I mean, ten years had passed. All interest was dead by this point. Nothing remained of the game's legacy but a group of people who must have been way, way too cool for Nineteen-frickin'-Ninety Seven's room, with everyone physically sick of them and none but the most token counterarguments being offered in exchange. And that was when the real beauty of the whole campaign struck me: you weren't just going to rob us of something we had enjoyed. You were going to keep going, and going, not merely eliminating any scrap of fondness but replacing it with reflexive revulsion ingrained by the ceaseless, thudding, completely fucking unnecessary repetition of Clinton-era JRPG hipsters. Done, and done. Thanks.
Now, I'd be remiss if I didn't mention the help you had along the way. Square-Enix themselves really outdid themselves in crushing out any remaining goodwill the fanbase might have still felt, but kept hidden. A bold move, to be sure, but this was an invaluable step; the most essential portion of quelling people's enthusiasm is in wrenching away that last, desperate, nigh-invincible kernel. But man, I have to admit, S-E came through with a masterful one-two punch: the ecstatic reveal of everything my nine-year old self could have wanted out of life a decade after anyone gave half a shit, and then the deliverance of it all exactly as my nine-year old self would have made it. That's the personal touch that can really hollow someone out.
But at that point, they were really just cheering on the work you shouldered. This was a true grassroots movement, and that's always inspiring to see. Fifteen fucking years of smug, nagging gripes about something that everyone else had tired of, sucking the nostalgia out of decent people for no God-damned reason whatsoever. You have successfully abolished and converted into malice every inkling of positive sentiment that your chosen foe ever held about something totally not worth even a tenth of the effort, and even though everything I know about the Internet and forums in particular has taught me that this is the higher purpose off all online communication, this may well be the only time I've ever seen anyone pull it off.
*slow clap*
So believe me when I say that this is the last I ever hope to hear or say about Final Fantasy VII, and if I ever, ever have to speak another word about it- if the world's most indifferent, unbiased individual asked me about it only out of sheer ignorance, if my grandchildren want to know what entertainment was like before sex droids, if, as a creaking, ancient husk of a man, I am asked to relate all that I can about the Old World because all pre-crisis knowledge is the most treasured gift our dying race could possess, it will be too soon. You did that for me. Thank you. Now let's all get on with our lives.
