Escape to the Movies: The Expendables

[Primus1985]

Besides the new Stark Trek and Transformers movies, why I think they rock is a discussion for another time, this one of the only reviews I dissagree with. Non-stop action, mildy humours, I thought the fight scenes kicked ass.

And I thought the blood was reasonable, it did spray out every time a baddie got sliced, stabbed, or shot. And seeing Jason Statham's knives go through a guys head or throut is a bit on the gory side.

That being said maybe Bob just didnt get it. I dont think it was omage to 80's action, I think it was honoring that spirit and trying to bring it into the modern age. Which in my opinion they did. If you go in with the mind set of watching a ball's to the wall, paper thin story(which works in these type of movies) popcorn munching Action movie, then you will be happy. Just dont look for any depth cause you wont find it.

 

[Dangerious P. Cats]

The actions movies of the '80's were defined by the insecuirty America as a whole felt then, though I suspect much of that is resurfacing as many Americans feel increasingly unsure about the future.

 

[awsome117]

I could barely finish watching this review. Took a lot of strength.

I can't believe Bob this week. We are obedient sheep because we go see one of the biggest collaboration films this decade instead of watching a film that was barely advertised in many places? We are the worst kind of people on earth because we like the premise that a movie will be an homage to 80s action films?

He dropped the ball on this review. Insulting a film is one thing, insulting someone for liking it is another, but insulting people for thinking the premise sounds like a fun idea?. That's a new low. I won't even go into how much I disagree with you on the quality of the film.

For someone who tries to hinder people from being elitist nerds, you are one of the biggest elitist nerds I've seen in quite a while.

Also this,

Also Movie Bob keeps holding up Equilibrium when talking about better action movies, that movie was utter twaddle pure over stylised matrix clone waffle. Even metacritic has it lower than the Expendables

I'm going to call it:

MovieBob is a hypocrite.

He complains that the people on earth are sheep following the word of the media and that we need to make our own decisions. BULLSHIT. That's not what he wants. He wants to be the one the sheep follow! That's why he's frustrated right now. A majority of people don't do what he thinks they should do, so he claims that they are sheep. What, so if we follow your word and just watch Scott Pilgrim instead of the Expendables we're not sheep?

Does he realize that Scott Pilgrim isn't AT ALL as appealing as The Expendables? Does he realize that Scott Pilgrim is aimed for a much smaller audience than the Expendables? If he doesn't, he's a moron. If he does, then he is frustrated because people won't go to see a film not meant for them, which, again, shows how he wants everyone to be his sheep, following his words. Anyone who doesn't? In Bob's eyes, they are the sheep of the media, explosion hungry idiots who don't deserve to watch films.

He's even worse than fucking Yahtzee! Yahtzee at least doesn't pretend to be anything else than someone who insults people that don't agree with him. Bob tries to make himself look like a god amongst nerds we all should follow, and when we don't, he starts to whine.

I love you. I love you so much.

Scott Pilgrim IS hipster crap.Just the trailer tells me that, with all it's bullcrap effects which make it look like an acid trip rather than a video game world. Tron did a video game world so much better than this. He is butthurt because the Expendables did better, but that's because Expendables wasn't designed to be a hipster shit film which only a select few(the ones who get mocked, I should say, for getting all the references) can watch. It was designed to be a fun throwback film which multiple people can enjoy. Acton buffs, people who love the classic action films, and yes, college jocks. Also, the movie was meant to be in two different formats; a violent one, and a PG13 one. Bob needs to realise that because a movie like the Expendables isn't the sole reason why this film fails. It's because films like this are for obsessed hipsters who think the franchise is the greatest thing of all time. Like the video game made, a boring beat-em-up which has awful pixel graphics and uninspired gameplay.

I'm gonna get suspended for this, as for all fan forums, the mods can't take opinions.

Neither can you (as far as I can tell) as I enjoyed Scott Pilgrim, so does that make me a hipster?

Anyway, a few friends of mine have seen The Expendables and didn't really liked it (and he was a jock really) but maybe I'll see it eventually.

 

[Josdeb]

Can't we just watch a bad movie without going and tearing it apart for not being good?

Here's the problem people:

MB is a critic. The Expendables is just that: expendable. (And I really can't believe nobody has made that joke/statement yet) It is a mindless action flick built on cliche and cash-in, with bad cinematography, watered-down characters, and no real purpose other than "HEY LOOK WE HAVE LOTS OF FAMOUS MUSCLES IN THIS ONE. MONEY PLZ". Bob is completely in the right by saying that it is a terrible movie, for it is his job. If Movie Bob had said otherwise, I don't believe I would have been able to continue to watch his series.

The fact that this movie did so well is backed by a "low" in an already lackluster summer movie schedule, a worldwide release date (as opposed to Scott Pilgrim's staggered release dates), and this being one of the last weekends of the summer, and as a result a good chance for people to go out with friends and see something mindless. The fact is that at the end of the day, The Expendables is MINDLESS. YOU ARE KNOWINGLY AND WILLINGLY WATCHING A MOVIE THAT IS TERRIBLE. And then you're complaining about it when a critic calls you a sheep. Guess what...if you were offended by the comment, you're probably a sheep, and you are the reason that the rest of us have to put up with shit movies like this in the first place. TBH, I will likely eventually watch this, but not in theaters, and very not likely at any expense of my own. They don't deserve my money.

People getting butthurt about MB not making any comments as to why it was terrible, I defer to the comments he made in the Scott Pilgrim review:

The action is incomprehensible and mostly-bloodless. No one gets any character stuff that plays to their strengths, they're all interchangeable. In fact, that's probably how Action Movie History will remember this weekend: 8/13/2010 - the weekend where the Michael Cera movie had better hand-to-hand fighting scenes than the one with Jason Statham and Jet Li. It's NOT a "tribute" to bad 80s action movies, it's just a bad 2010 movie. If I could hire a sky-writer to warn whole hemispheres not to waste their money on it, I would.

What frustrates me about the people who are refusing to see Scott Pilgrim (and don't all "FANBOY" on me; I haven't seen it, nor have I read the comics, etc, so don't bother), is the Micheal Cera hate. I get it: he gets cast in alot of movies where he plays an awkward teen. However, if my research is correct, the role he is playing in SP is one of a bit of an asshole, a la his alternate personality in Youth in Revolt. That alternate personality was by far the funniest part about that movie, so I'm still at least willing to see the movie to see how it works out.

It's so hypocritical that the overall argument about The Expendables vs. SP is "How dare you call me a sheep for seeing a shit movie that has Terry Crews/Stallone/Jet Li/Statham etc.! No I don't want to see Scott Pilgrim. I heard it's pretty good, but I just hate that Michael Cera guy. If you see that movie you're nothing but a sheep."

ANY day of the week, I would rather see a good movie with a meh actor than a terrible movie with a great actor(s).

This is kind of my feeling of The Expendables. I really don't want to see it. At all. I mean, I've personally never been a fan of the action genre (Like, I enjoy it occassionally, but I prefer other movies) and when I first saw the posters for The Expendables I did feel sad on the inside because I knew it would be popular and do well.
Not because it would be such a new an innovative movie, but because the stars of the films would just rake in movie-goers regardless of how good the movie was or not. But I guess thats just me personally. I prefer comedies really.

I also enjoyed Scott Pilgrim, but I actually went in expecting an average movie, maybe a bit brain-dead, but I really loved it.
Oh, and I've never enjoyed Michael Cera before. Ever. He's always deeply annoyed me. But I must say, he's actually not too bad when his character is a bit of an angry douche. I mean, instead of being the nice guy who gets the girl, he's the kinda funny guy who cheats and lies to girls, then decides to outright kill a bunch of dudes.

 

[Josdeb]

The reason why I think Scott Pilgrim bombed it? Micheal Cera...Yea! People dont think Cera can pull out of his Geek/Awkward/Nice Kid character and just act in another tone. Whereas Expendables has all those action movie actors that everyone wanted to see a return of from the 80's. Lets face up to facts that people would rather see Stallone compared to "that one kid from Superbad". To be fair if I wasnt a Scott Pilgrim fan I would probably leave the movie alone for Cera alone and see Expendables

I agree with you to an extent since I've never been a Cera fan but I'm gonna play Devil's Advocate for a minute here:

Cera is always cast as an awkward guy who gets the girl in every movie he is in and therefore has no range and therefore talent.

Stallone/Willis/Schwarzenegger/Stratham is always cast as an over-the-top, gung-ho, testosterone fueled, macho guy, but therefore has an incredible range and loads of talent?

Neither of the leads of these films tends to venture past their "safe zones" but one film's cast is better than the other because of it?

 

[non_entity]

Look, Bob. I've defended you more than I need have, you're probably one of my favourite movie critics but please, for the love of God, accept that not every movie has to be this artistic piece, with amazing acting, original set pieces and have an important message behind them. Some movies are just meant to be enjoyable to sit through. Salt was this and you appeared to like that even if there were two reasons attached to Jolie that probably helped your opinion along the way.

And please, stop stating that everyone who likes a movie you don't is worthless. Transformers, Book of Eli, and now Expendables - some people just like to sit through a movie that's brainless. Whilst they're not that good, stating that everyone who likes them is pretty much wrong is just arrogant and pretentious.

Not everyone who likes bad action movies is this douchebag frat boy, who can't tell the difference between an etch-a-sketch and a Da Vinci. Just accept that occasionally people don't see things the way you do, because you're starting to become insufferable.

Brainless != good/bad.

300 wasn't an intellectual masterpiece but it was a fucking awesome movie, it was well executed, well acted (imo) and overall pretty damn good.

I expected the same thing from Clash of the Titans, not necessarily a very intelligent movie but good action etc. - the movie disappointed me soooo much. I can't think of one good thing about the movie and I looked forward to it so very much.
I wanted another 300, what I got was a steaming turd. What a fucking waste.

I already feared the Expendables was in danger of becoming another such turd and if I believe Movie Bob it seems I was right, unfortunately.

I never expected Expendables to be a great movie, just a damn good action movie but it seems it's not even that.

So I won't go see it and save my money.

For Scott Pilgrim, a movie I've wanted to see for a while (not fanatically but well, would be nice to see a well-made Gamer movie for once, and hey, it's fucking Edgar Wright!)... when it comes out, here, in FUCKING JANUARY 2011! Goddamn.
If they don't want people to pirate movies they shouldn't fucking release them like half a year after the rest of the world.... I won't pirate it but damn I was tempted when I read about this release date on IMDB...

 

[LXQUICKJUSTICE]

This article proves my point. Scott Pilgrim FAILS vs the world for a reason.

http://media.www.capahaarrow.com/media/storage/paper768/news/2010/08/20/ArtsEntertainment/Scott.Pilgrim.Unsuccessfully.Vs.The.World-3924669.shtml

Bob fails because he can't figure this out

 

[JacobPlackett]

What's funny is that he's saying that the college jocks and such are the worst for things like movies when he made an entire GAME OVERTHINKER video (spelled it in caps because that's how it's spelt, Bob not realising that Youtube Search doesn't look for the loudest video that acts like it's shouting to get attention) welcoming new kinds of people into video games.

So video games are cool for jocks to have but movies aren't? Bob, you are a hipster.

 

[Aiddon_v1legacy]

This article proves my point. Scott Pilgrim FAILS vs the world for a reason.

http://media.www.capahaarrow.com/media/storage/paper768/news/2010/08/20/ArtsEntertainment/Scott.Pilgrim.Unsuccessfully.Vs.The.World-3924669.shtml

Bob fails because he can't figure this out

yeah, you have ONE article to help SUPPORT your point. You want me to bring in the literal DOZENS of reviews that help support Scott Pilgrim as good and The Expendables as a boring, generic action flick that will be forgotten as soon as Rodriguez's Machete hits theaters?

 

[Turkey Braveheart]

I have a rule Moviebob: Anyone who calls people 'sheep' is an a--hole and as much a narrow minded follower as those they slam.

Read between the lines.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go work out like the poor, dimwitted muscle fetishist that I am.

 

[Cyan.]

Fuck Scott pilgrim.

Even my girlfriend liked the Expendibles and was able to understand what it stood for.... And she was born in 1990....

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Snip

The sad thing is, they actually DID take a movie meant to be a PG-13 and made it R. The studio made to cuts to the Movie, one being PG-13 and the other being the one on screen now and let a test audiance decide what would make more money. They wanted R, so the effect team added the same amount a gore a noise bleed has so it barely got an R rating.

In retrospect: Can you name a great action movie from the 80 that if full of blood? I love the Rambo series but even if you count the cuts on the heroes, you never see blood. Not like modern day action flick at least. There's even a joke Hot Shots! Part Deux where no enemies bleed. Even the one that got hit with a rocket become a "Tom and Jerry' Smear on the wall".

While that is true for a lot of old action movies, some really amped up the gore.

You seen Total Recall recently?

 

[clauwman]

Well. I have lost almost every respect I had for you Bob. The action in this movie was absolutely great. I have numerous times agreed with you (never really on any action, as you rarely discuss it), but this was so f**king opposite of what I thought that it's absolutely f**king ridiculous. There were plenty of memorable kills in the movie.

How about how Stallone used a pistol as a f**king machine gun? (he seriously shot fast and reloaded fast. Absolutely a cool feature).

Most of the action was well executed as well. I would really like to sit down with you and watch it and point out some awesome scenes.

F**k this. I feel so disappointed. Sh*t...

I will not stop watching your reviews as they are always worth watching, but God f**king damn I have never disagreed so much with you before, and I get the sense that you have absolutely no feel whatsoever for action.

Yeah, what he said.

I am extremely disappointed in you, Bob. People watch your reviews and depend on your advice. The Expendables is a roller coaster ride of a movie with some top notch action.

And you know what? SOME people don't feel like paying money to see Michael Cera TRY to act.

 

[xDarc]

Maybe one of the 20 more to get green-lit will actually be good?

I can understand if the movie was a misleading abomination, but I would welcome anything that attempts or inspires to get hollywood back to making fun movies again; at least tepidly.

I hated it when my slashers were replaced with psychological thrillers.
I hated it when my action heroes were replaced with girls.

I don't like change. So sue me.

 

[Aiddon_v1legacy]

Snip

The sad thing is, they actually DID take a movie meant to be a PG-13 and made it R. The studio made to cuts to the Movie, one being PG-13 and the other being the one on screen now and let a test audiance decide what would make more money. They wanted R, so the effect team added the same amount a gore a noise bleed has so it barely got an R rating.

In retrospect: Can you name a great action movie from the 80 that if full of blood? I love the Rambo series but even if you count the cuts on the heroes, you never see blood. Not like modern day action flick at least. There's even a joke Hot Shots! Part Deux where no enemies bleed. Even the one that got hit with a rocket become a "Tom and Jerry' Smear on the wall".

While that is true for a lot of old action movies, some really amped up the gore.

You seen Total Recall recently?

Robocop was another. Predator too.

 

[Vash108]

I enjoyed Expendables and had fun watching it. IMO, favorite kills were with Terry Crewz and his AA12. Also it kinda seems a little weird how you rage vs this after your Gi Joe review. http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/escape-to-the-movies/866-G-I-Joe-The-Rise-of-Cobra



I probably wont see Scott Pilgrim though because I loathe Michael Cera.

 

[xDarc]

[
And you know what? SOME people don't feel like paying money to see Michael Cera TRY to act.

lol... yeah Michael Cera really is the face of his generation and I could take him or leave him.

 

[WaderiAAA]

Piranha definitely looks fun

 

[AmayaOnnaOtaku]

Fuck Scott pilgrim.

Even my girlfriend liked the Expendibles and was able to understand what it stood for...

Hell I got my bf to go because I liked it so much. I think a movie like the expendables is what the public needed after the twilight BS.


Thought Dear Mr. Statham: I wanted to see your ass in this movie!!

 

[JacobPlackett]

I agree with the G.I.Joe thing; it's trying to reach out the the same audience as the Transformers audience, but it was better.

He is about as snobby as Yahtzee, except it is about movies. I actually like Yahtzee (well, only a little bit, I hated it when he called Transformers:War For Cybertron bland and unchallenging with out giving reason for it. Instead he reviewed a game which no one gives a fuck about and an old PS2 game which is loved anyway so it was kind of obvious he would like it).