Favorite Mass Effect 2 Quotes

[AceDiamond]

*After Shepard has interrupted his interrogation of an Eclipse Merc by shoving him out a window*
Jacob: ...so when do we read him his rights?

---

Grunt: My rage is my choice, not my compulsion
(something to that effect, I actually forget the second half of it)

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Garrus: Anybody miss all those long elevator rides we used to have on the Citadel?
Tali: No...
Garrus: Oh come on it was how we all got to know each other, we'd all ask you about the Migrant Fleet, it was interesting!
Tali: Stop it.
Garrus: Tell us again about your immune system!
Tali: I have a shotgun
Garrus: ...Perhaps now is not a good time.

(perhaps the best part of this conversation is that it occurs while traveling between floors by stairs in the Citadel)

---

Garrus: Nobody will give me a mirror, how bad is it?
Shepard: Aw hell Garrus you were always an ugly son of a *****, just smear some face paint on it and nobody will be able to tell
Garrus: *chuckles then winces* ow...don't make me laugh.

 

[T-Bone24]

Garrus: "Don't you miss all those elevator rides?"
Tali: "No."
Garrus: "Come on, don't you miss getting to know each other? About life on the flotilla?"
Tali: "Stop."
Garrus: "Tell me about your immune system!"
Tali: "I have a shotgun."

EDIT: Bloody ninjas! Shoo!

EDIT Twice: I also never seem to be getting those conversations with Mordin, about interspecies romance or Gilbert and Sullivan. Can you only get those before you go on the suicide mission?

 

[Paralyze]

Everything said by Zaeed, and Thane.

 

[Penitent]

It's been said before, and it should be said again.

"I had reach, but she had flexibility."

Garrus you dog, you.

 

[tkioz]

"That means Sir Isaac Newton is the deadliest-son-of-a-***** in space!" and "Do Not Ruin Asari for Me" at the bachelor party on Illium

 

[EMFCRACKSHOT]

snip

When people tell you to use the search bar, i like to quote Lethal Weapon "you know why i don't have an ulcer, because i know when to say i don't give a fuck. And i don't give a fuck"

And mine is "You know me Sheppard, i always like to savour the last shot before ejecting the heatsink"

 

[Agayek]

Legion: "Geth do not infiltrate."

C-Sec Officer: "Sir, you should leave your personal synthetic assistant at home, they're not allowed to travel anymore." (Or words to that effect)

Legion: "Geth do not intentionally infiltrate."

Fixt.

That is a badass event there. Pretty much anything involving Legion is pure win.

 

[kommunizt kat]

interrogation scene thane loyalty renegade action:
"tell me (something about target of assassination )or I'll cut your balls off and sell them to a krogan!"

 

[T-Bone24]

Crewman (to ship cook): "Hey Rupert, you done something different with this? Tastes like you put in a lot more food and a lot less ass."

 

[Acier]

The Krogan scout in Mordin's loyalty mission

Shep "It would take a real badass to make it back to camp injured"
Krogan "I can do it"
Shep "I said a badass not some whiny scout who whines like a quarian with a tummy ache"
Tali "Hey!"
Krogan "RAAAWG I CAN DO IT" *runs off*
Tali "...I can't believe that worked"

 

[Antitonic]

I'd have to go with either:

Asari: It's decided. I'm buying a fish
Turian: Fine. Ruined the whole Citadel for me.

Or:

Joker: My last ship got on just fine without an AI telling me 'the airlock is ajar'"

I can't remember if these are exact, but close enough for government work.

 

[Quad08]

snip

When people tell you to use the search bar, i like to quote Lethal Weapon "you know why i don't have an ulcer, because i know when to say i don't give a fuck. And i don't give a fuck"

Haha thanks. I'll be sure to remember that

 

[Spoonius]

Not a quote, but the part where the stoned Volus tried to launch a biotic missile was hilarious. Plus the conversation before that was great.



JOKER: "You just want me to go through the ducts again."

EDI: "I enjoy the sight of humans on their knees."

JOKER: *blank stare*

EDI: "That was a joke."



ENGINEER DANIELS: "It [Miranda's uniform] certainly makes me stand to attention..."



PURGATORY PRISONER: "I hear their screams at night... it's great..."

 

[BigStupidJellyfish]

Im Commander Shepard, and this is my favourite store of the citadel- Advertisement

 

[thebobmaster_v1legacy]

"Don't. fuck. with Aria."

My jaw actually dropped at that line. "Dude, did Mass Effect just drop an F-Bomb?"

On topic...

EDI: We can save the Normandy, Mr. Moreau, but you're going to have to help me. Give me the ship.
Joker: What, are you crazy? You start singing "Daisy Bell" and I'm done!

And also (spoilers for a romance track):

Spoiler

Garrus: 'I'd wait, if you're okay with it. Disrupt the crew as little as possible...and take that last chance to find some calm just before the storm. You know me, I always like to savor the last shot before popping the heat sink.'
*long awkward pause consisting of Shepard just staring at Garrus with a sly smile*
Garrus: Wait... that metaphor just went somewhere horrible.

 

[Drundy]

I like all of the jokes from that citadel gaming dude.

 

[Jerich0]

I love the part where Ellis says 'Hey, I ever tell ya'll bout the time me and my buddy Keith were in a burning building and we had to fight our way through like five floors of zombies to... oh, wait. That was you guys. Man, I can't wait to tell my buddy Keith about that!'

 

[Cosmic Naginata]

Legion "We are building a consensus please try again later."

Joker "Garrus has finally pulled that stick out of his butt only now he wants to beat people to death with it."

 

[LordMoose]

I liked the very heartbreaking conversation of the Salarian Father, talking to his Asari daughter about getting his wife a gift, that would last. He was already 35, and he knew he didnt have long with his daughter and wife. And the daughter's voice broke up a bit, brought me to tears it did...