Favorite Simpson Quotes

[arsenicCatnip]

Mr. Burns: (after being insulted by the Ramones at his birthday party) Smithers, I want the Rolling Stones killed.
Smithers: But sir, those aren't...
Mr. Burns: I SAID DO IT.

 

[Johanthemonster666]

***Deleted**

 

[Jack_Uzi]

I can't find the correct qoute of this one anywhere (so If someone does, please correct me).
But it was something like this:

Mr. Burns: "Homer, consider yourself redundant."
Homer: "Oh, can I go back to work now?"

 

[Anarchemitis]

"Brothers and Sisters are natural enemies.
Like Englishmen and Scots.
Or Welshman and Scots.
Or Japanese and Scots!
OR SCOTS AND OTHER SCOTS!!
Damn Scots! The ruined Scotland!"
"You Scots sure are a contentious people."
"YOU JUST MADE AN ENEMY FOR LIFE!!"

-Groundskeeper Willy on Siblings.

 

[The Artificially Prolonged]

Raplh "Me fail English, thats unpossible"

Homer goes to college "Hey look, you pull his tail and curls right back up. Curly, striaght, curly, straight, curly, striaght"

 

[WhiteFangofWhoa]

Many choices, but the first to come to mind is every bit of when Bart recruits the Red Hot Chili Peppers for the Krusty Komeback Special, not to mention their reactions to Krusty's attempt to change their lyrics later on.

Bart: Hey Moe! Look over there!
Moe: What? What is it I'm looking at here? Something on my wall? What?

Homer: Hey Moe, what're you looking at? Can I look too?
Moe: Sure, but it'll cost ya.
Homer: My wallet's in the car!
Moe: He is so stupid. And now back to the wall.

 

[googleit6]

Homer: I can tell the difference between butter and 'I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.'".
I think it's from "Secrets of a Sucessful Marriage".

 

[googleit6]

"DENTAL PLAN"

HAHA! That was so funny.
"DENTAL PLAN!"
"Lisa needs braces."
"DENTAL PLAN!"
"Lisa needs braces."
"DENTAL PLAN!"
*drops pencil down butt crack*

 

[thenumberthirteen]

ZE GOGGLES DO NOTHING!!!

 

[Johanthemonster666]

P.S That one store salesman that goes "AYEEEESSS" ^O^

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOubPWGUhQo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpQVIlWPmac&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Wbb2JasnQg&NR=1

 

[Discord]

this

 

[Dark Sup3rn0va]

Marge: We're going to school for the Parent/Teacher meetings. We'll bring dinner home.
Lisa: What are you going to bring home?
Homer: Well it depends. If both of you have been good, pizza. If not then poison.
Lisa: What if one of us has been good and one of us has been
Bart: Poisoned pizza?
Homer: Oh no! I'm not making two stops.

From Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie

and

This is when Homer is trying to get the candy and soda from the machines.
Rescue Worker: Homer, there's no easy way to put this, but we're going to have to saw your arms off.
Homer: They'll grow back, right?
Rescue Worker: Oh... yeah.
Homer: Whew.
Rescue Worker: Wait a sec, Homer are you just holding on to a can?
Homer: You're point being?

From Marge on the Lam.

 

[Nowheremaan]

Homer: "Don't worry Marge, we're none of us perfect"
Streetcar episode.

Or when Moe gets a girlfriend..."I'm gonna buy you a steak the size of a toilet seat"

 

[ginty2]

Your guilty conscience makes you vote democratic, but secretly you long for a cold hearted republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals and RULE YOU LIKE A KING!

Sideshow bob

 

[Get_A_Grip_]

To the book depository!

 

[teqrevisited]

CRACK /shudder
CRACK /shudder
CRACK /shudder etc

Sideshow Bob of course!

There's just something about rakes hitting a man in the face & that shuddering noise he made that had me in stitches.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Makes me laugh more than it should.

 

[spacepope22]

Homer: "English side ruined, must use French instructions..."Le Grill," What the hell is that!?"

 

[Omikron009]

The Simpsons is one of the most quotable shows ever, so let's see if I can think of some good ones.

"You tried your best, and failed miserably. The lesson here is: never try."

"MY EYES! THE GOGGLES DO NOTHING!"

"Let my muscles hug you."

Those aren't my favourite, but they do spring to mind.