First thing you'd say after rising from a coma.

[The Code]

"........so I said, rectum? Damn near killed him."

You, good sir/madam, have just won yourself +10 internets. d-(^_^)-b

OT: "Where am I, what year is it, and is my grandmother dead yet?" If you know me well enough, you'll understand the last part.

 

[JamesBr]

shit. not again.

 

[Zeraki]

There is only one possible thing I would say after waking from a coma.

"Chimichanga!"

 

[Jaime_Wolf]

"Uuuuuuuhhhhh" or some similarly strangled half-aware, unused-vocal-tract sound.

 

[the-kitchen-slayer]

Gaming still happening saturday?

 

[teqrevisited]

/Yawn "Oh god it's you lot."

Jokingly, of course.

 

[kastanok]

LET ME GO BACK! LET ME GO BACK!

 

[robodukky]

"BOO! Hahaha you should see the looks on your faces!"

 

[NnyTheV]

"And boy, are my arms tired!"

 

[adamson1000]

HELLLLLOOOOOO NURSE!

 

[A Sense Of Decorum]

*snort* Bfsnifzlmn... *blink*

 

[Davey Woo]

I would probably say I'm hungry/thirsty.
Not very imaginative but hey it's probably true.

Also: My captcha has Oliphant in it, how awesome!

 

[Lonely Swordsman]

"I have slept long enough for one lifetime. Release me, there is much work to do."

 

[Kiju]

"What year is it?"

 

[H20 Pirate]

"Crap, I'm late for work"

 

[Ildecia]

"is jace, the mind sculptor selling for less that 10 dollars each?"

"no. but they reprinted kamigawa."

"kill me."

 

[lastlived]

I'd say something like, "GAMISHGABER" (spore) then speak gibberish to the doctors and use hand all my normal hand gestures and body language as if i was really telling them something interesting.

 

[Irony's Acolyte]

Something completely random that makes no sense out of context.

"... and I am never going on a plane with a coffeemaker again!"

"... no! Put the lamp on the car!"

"That's why we don't feed headphones to giant crabs."

Or perhaps just glance around the room a bit before ominously saying: "I have returned."