Funniest Video Game Quotes

[TaintedNails]

Mickey Cantor (The Announcer in Monday Night Combat) has some good lines.

"Today's action is brought to you by GrenAde III sports drink! It's an explosion of flavor... in your mouth!"

"The Icemen are your winners! Which is bad news for their fans, who are outnumbered 3 to 1 by the Hotshots combat hooligans waiting outside the Arena right now, lets go live to that action."

"Hey, your mom called! She wants you to upgrade your skills, hi-oh! ...No, seriously, she did call. How did she get my number?"

 

[InnerRebellion]

All hail Desmond Miles, the king of amazing and witty comebacks!

 

[Cain_Zeros]

"Of course I f**kin' fixed him! It was a huge pain in the f**kin' wastepan too, because he's some kinda custom jobbie!"-Krunk, from Metal Arms: Glitch in the System. Maybe not the funniest quote from the game, but a good idea.

 

[Omniponent]

"What the foxtrot is going on here?" Jurassic the Hunted

 

[The Sandvich]

Every single piece of dialogue ever spoken in Team Fortress 2. Yes, even that one

Ignoring that obviousness, there's also this one line from Red Dead Redemption that I loved. It was during one of the Irish missions

Irish: Who the feck 're you?
John: I'm your old friend, amnesia! *pistol whips him*

 

[Jelly ^.^]

Why has nobody said 'the entire script of Sam and Max Hit the Road'

or '95% of the dialogue from the 1996 Fable'

or anything Duke Nukem used to sprout?

 

[The Sandvich]

I have to agree, Duke Nukem's dialogue was really awesome. He was like the Arnold Schwarzenegger of video games

 

[michael_ab]

SMOKIN JESUS TITTY CINNIMON THAT THING IS A MONSTER!!!!!! THIS IS GONNA BE SWEEEEEET!!!!!!!!

-scooter when you find the supercharger in boarderlands

mothers coming for me in the dragon ships! i dont like these itchy clothes, but i have to wear them or it frightens the fish.

- in oblivion, the retarded wood elf in anvil.

 

[Trolldor]

Quote: Take heart fellow adventurers, for you have curried the favor of Boo, The only miniature giant space hamster in the Realm. My friend and companion ever since my h-h-head wound, he will lead us to victory! Onward to the Gnoll Stronghold to the west! Tarry not! We must go soon!

 

[TheMann]

Other than the many, many lines from Duke Nukem and Portal which are almost too numerous to mention, I thought MDK 2 was consistently funny. Two of the better ones:

 

[AwesomePeanutz]

[url-http://zanyvgquotes.com/]Here. Have an entire website full of them.[/url]

Link doesn't work.

 

[Easton Dark]

"HEY EVERYBODY, THIS SHOP DISCRIMINATES AGAINST THE POOR!"

 

[Shameless]

"Hell I'd still hit it" from the most recent Duke Nukem Trailer

 

[floppylobster]

A sticky grenade lands on our Warthog as it flies off a ramp and into the water. "This is bad", the Aussie marine in the passenger, a master of understatement, says as we flip upside down shortly before being blown to pieces.

- Halo 2

We get completely thrashed and overrun in a game of Team Fortress 2. Hiding out in a small room I try not to be kill in the end of match slaughter. Having never played the doctor I try out his taunt for the first time. "Thank you", he bows. That's nice touch I think, he must be paying respect to the other team for the thrashing we got. "Dummkopfs", he adds. Just as they pour into the room guns ready. End game just before they can kill me.

- Team Fortress 2

 

[darth.pixie]

Voice of the Inquisition: "Further violators of curfew will be threatened with smitting, then smitten. Once smote, further smitation and subsequent resmitation will commence until the smittee is deemed to be sufficiently smit by the smitter."


Dalboz: "Your sword's blowing glue! Uh, let me try that again. Your sword's glowing blue!"

 

[hannan4mitch]

Voice of the Inquisition: "Further violators of curfew will be threatened with smitting, then smitten. Once smote, further smitation and subsequent resmitation will commence until the smittee is deemed to be sufficiently smit by the smitter."


Dalboz: "Your sword's blowing glue! Uh, let me try that again. Your sword's glowing blue!"

What is that from?
EDIT: Never mind, google'd it.

 

[Dr. Paine]

"Ah yes, 'Reapers'. A sentient race of machines. We have dismissed that claim."

"Geth do not intentionally infiltrate."

"You refused to testify. Obviously, you hate justice."

"I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster."

 

[silverleaf81]

In Assassins Creed 2 when you meet your uncle. "Its a me, Mario!"