Genies... Three wishes... What would you wish for?

[Auron555]

Well if we can't tell anyone our wishes, how can we post? : p

I want the cash equivalent of $314,159,265,358.98 after all applicable taxes of legal Canadian currency in a secure bank account which I have the password for, but to withdraw more than $100K, required retinal and fingerprint biometric identification in person at a registered bank.

Next I want to be immune to illness, injury, or aging (ie, nearly identical to Hancock's powers) until such time I decide to end my life by placing my left index finger up my right nostril and my right index finger up my left nostril, sing the lyrics to "Still Alive" while spinning in a circle, then fall on my back. Odds of doing THAT by accident, or having that particular achilles heel found out, Sho Shmall.

Lastly, controllable super muscles. Speed, strength, endurance, and physical health all far beyond mere mortals, on demand.

Until now...now we know how to kill you

Okay... you get him alone, but how do you make him sing?


Mine would be
1) Stupid people are not heard.
2)I can has teh awesoem guitar skills.
3)I will be happy.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

1) Everyone who's tried to cheat a genie becomes a P.E.(Gym) Teacher
2) Everyone I like gets enough money to live comfortably
3) I keep everything I had in the past

 

[Red Rebel]

Ok I read the previous pages and it looks like you guys are somehow totally into dream-crushing.I thought this was actually a thread about what whishes you would do, wasnt it? And now it somehow turned into a big, mean Whish-Destroying-Factory.
So stop being so serious and let the people have some wacky whishes!

1.Teh p0w3rz of Awezo0omness (strenght, speed, lazer-eyes, indestructibility, no aging 'n stuff)
2.Some Zombies break loose in Unspecifidistan(coughcoughiraqcough), country gets shut off, and we gotz da self made Zombie-Disneyland, open for Murderers and everyone who wants to become one!
3.A plane ticket (You know where to!)

 

[Red Rebel]

Ever heard something of forum rules? Well, if not, i hope the admins are gonna hammer some into you.
I'm not agains iraq, nor am rascist or have the opinon, that ANY country on thıs planet should be destroyed.
And İ also think that you are able to read. WACKY whishes. Do İ have to say anything more?
Do you REALLY think that when İ had 3 whishes, which could turm me into Mr. Uberawesome, İ would whish such a crap?
İf jes, EVER HEARD OF THE WORD SARCASM?!

 

[Skalman]

Why the fuss of needing so many wishes? these are all you'll ever need

1)Infinite Brain capacity/power
2)Absolute Control over Everything (everything, everywhere in every dimension at all places in time)
3)I guess this one is pretty useless?

Notice how i made sure to put Brain Power first, else I'd probably implode or something.

I'd be omnipotent, omnipresent and...
...probably pretty bored.

 

[Copter400]

Why wish for world peace, I want a piece of the world...

1) I wish I was elected President of the Escapist
2) I wish I was declared Dictator for Life of Earth
3) I wish I really had 2 Super Star Destroyers and 20 Gold Plated Star Destroyers (Now how will you end my reign of tyranny?)

We'll call in McGyver, who will destroy the Destroyers with a lemon twist, a toothpick and a can of refrigerant.

 

[Bulletinmybrain]

Well if we can't tell anyone our wishes, how can we post? : p

I want the cash equivalent of $314,159,265,358.98 after all applicable taxes of legal Canadian currency in a secure bank account which I have the password for, but to withdraw more than $100K, required retinal and fingerprint biometric identification in person at a registered bank.

Next I want to be immune to illness, injury, or aging (ie, nearly identical to Hancock's powers) until such time I decide to end my life by placing my left index finger up my right nostril and my right index finger up my left nostril, sing the lyrics to "Still Alive" while spinning in a circle, then fall on my back. Odds of doing THAT by accident, or having that particular achilles heel found out, Sho Shmall.

Lastly, controllable super muscles. Speed, strength, endurance, and physical health all far beyond mere mortals, on demand.

I love your ideas...Wanna make babys? kidding lol.


Anyways mine would be.


The ability to shoot shurkiens and lightning out my ass.

To talk to jesus with my middle finger.

And pretty much how khell said we would never die unless he does whatever.

Shurikens and lightning?

Lemme guess; you just finished watching Yahtzee's 'Painkiller' review?

Yeah I was going to suggest the stake gun but that might tear, and that would hurt..

 

[Slayer_2]

1: A Crysis nano-suit built under my skin: AKA super cyborg powers.
2: A bank account that gets 50,000 added to it each month. (regenerating money)
3: The ability to morph my body shape and how it acts. (I could get rid of my curly hair and dandruff as well as get an easy six pack).

 

[Mikav]

1. A gun
2. Some bullets
3. ... We'll find out now won't we?

 

[LewsTherin]

1. Roots wish with the Gym teacher doesn't apply to me, the consequences of my genie cheating wish are made null to everyone, cannot be passed on to another target.
2. Total control over the cells and functions of my body, but would still allow my brain to micromanage breathing, heart pumping, digestion, etc. unless I choose to override.
3. two more wishes to be granted by the Djinn to which I speak currently.
4.Control over the latent abilities of the human mind, my own. If psychokinesis is not included, add it, but I have complete control of said ability
5.a Les Paul, black and white, starburst pattern, to be presented by Gibson after my band makes it big .

I read the Bartimaeus books, as well as the Monkey's Paw. Win.

 

[Exosus]

Lacking a degree in Genie-law, I will refrain from wishing, but as I read I am struck with an interesting question: What do you think draws mankind into these discussions and thought-loops about genies and the ways they can ruin our perfectly good wishes?

 

[X3heartless]

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[X3heartless]

1. The truth about which religion is true (if any of them are)
2. Something that will stop People from killing other people
3. A cure for cancer or (if cancer has been cured)

i know what can complete all of your wishes.Chuck Norrisses tears...to bad he never cries...

 

[Finite]

Well, its really tempting to wish for the power of prescience but as anyone who has read dune will know, that never turns out well.
1. Telekinesis - possibly the coolest power it is possible to have
2. I want to know what the HELL happened to alma in F.E.A.R =.=
3. a new power source, other than oil, to be discovered which causes no negative effects, wave goodbye to global warming!

 

[CatmanStu]

1. That my last two wishes go to the wisest person on the planet.

(Then hope for the sake of mankind he doesn't already have them).

 

[Hey Joe]

1. The abolition of all memory of war. Then we would not know what it is, and old prejeduces would be broken.

2. An unsolvable rubix cube so that wars would start again.

3. A guitar infused with the soul of Hendrix

 

[the monopoly guy]

Most of these wishes are for ones own greedy nature, and while I see nothing wrong with that I would
1 restore all natural habitats to the way they were before humans encroched upon them
2 bring al animals brought to near extinction or to extinction by humans back
3 ruler of the f*cking cosmos

 

[SeaCalMaster]

Most of these wishes are for one's own greedy nature, and while I see nothing wrong with that I would
1 restore all natural habitats to the way they were before humans encroached upon them
2 bring all animals brought to near extinction or to extinction by humans back
3 ruler of the f*cking cosmos

The first wish would eliminate humanity entirely, including you, and so your other wishes would not exist. Also, making you the ruler of the fucking cosmos would give you a title only; it would not necessarily bestow upon you any powers.

By the way, it's alright. You can swear on the Internet. (We all know the rest.)