good guys finish last

[Shemming]

Well im at high school were being nice does seem to have no benifits I dont know about real life but its true for high school.

And being a dick seems to work better at school as well, trust me i tried both and being dick makes you more popular and liked. I then went back to being nice as i am a nice person.

 

[BonsaiK]

So i have decided that being a nice guy has no benifit in the real world, being a yessir man at work doesnt help and being really nice to women has me permanatly stuck as friends it sucks

Answered in the Relationship Problem thread at the following link: ----> http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.117161-Relationship-problem-thread?page=42#7321626

 

[Anah'ya]

Actually. He has a point.

Being a jerk will net you more girls and ensure a steady and profitable climb in your career of choice. However, it has to be well played, or it will backfire.

...

Man. The world sucks if you look at it from a realistic point of view.

 

[Eliam_Dar]

Actually. He has a point.

Being a jerk will net you more girls and ensure a steady and profitable climb in your career of choice. However, it has to be well played, or it will backfire.

...

Man. The world sucks if you look at it from a realistic point of view.

I ask you now, are those girls really worth your time?

 

[Anah'ya]

Actually. He has a point.

Being a jerk will net you more girls and ensure a steady and profitable climb in your career of choice. However, it has to be well played, or it will backfire.

...

Man. The world sucks if you look at it from a realistic point of view.

I ask you now, are those girls really worth your time?

What girls?

 

[Raikov]

And why would you want to change from being a 'nice guy'? If girls go for the jerks, it's definitely not because of you. It's because most women under the age of 25 are stupid and insecure.

And this will not change any time soon.

 

[Anah'ya]

And why would you want to change from being a 'nice guy'? If girls go for the jerks, it's definitely not because of you. It's because most women under the age of 25 are stupid and insecure.

And this will not change any time soon.

No. It's because women (not only girls) gravitate towards the alpha male in a room. The alpha male is usually the one that others might consider a "jerk". Not talking idiotic ass-hat jerk that spouts mother jokes 24/7, drinks himself into oblivion and scratches his balls in front of his mother in law.

 

[Labyrinth]

So i have decided that being a nice guy has no benifit in the real world, being a yessir man at work doesnt help and being really nice to women has me permanatly stuck as friends it sucks

Let me begin with a simple statement. If you open a relationship with a woman as a friend, you portray only the intention of being a friend. Is it any surprise she puts you in that capacity? Really? Going into a 'friendship' with the intention of sleeping with the woman is dishonest, underhand bullshit.

The "Nice Guy(tm)" is, really, not nice at all. Blaming on one's situation the faults of one's character is not a good move. In relationships they tend towards abusive and emotionally controlling due to insecurity and self-obsession. Their inability to establish stable sexual relations is the fault of the women around them, for whatever reason. Women don't date Nice Guys because most of us have dated them before, and learned from the experience. This behaviour either drives women away or attracts the kind of predator who no-one should be in a relationship with.

Blah. Blah. Blah.

Instead of being a Nice Guy(tm) try being a genuinely compassionate and attentive human being. Not every woman will cast herself at your feet. In fact, few will. That's pretty normal. Some, however, are likely to accept your desires and reciprocate them. A relationship doesn't consist of one side fetishising the other and the other as a passive vassal for this. It's a two-way thing.

Edit: I feel it important to add that I've noticed a trend amongst Nice Guys for catagorising humans into three groups. Jerks, Women, and Nice Guys. All women (or all women under 30) are to blame for his relationship woes because they go for the Jerks. Obviously they like being abused or something like that. This kind of core misogyny is a major factor in the Nice Guy's troubles. Treating females like we're people too is important for any kind of empathy.

 

[Oh That Dude]

The only advice, besides "be yourself and be happy about it", is:

Buy a sword.
Go nuts.
Enjoy your killingspree.

*Halo announcer voice*
SWORD SPREE

OT: Sure is blog in here.

 

[Eliam_Dar]

Actually. He has a point.

Being a jerk will net you more girls and ensure a steady and profitable climb in your career of choice. However, it has to be well played, or it will backfire.

...

Man. The world sucks if you look at it from a realistic point of view.

I ask you now, are those girls really worth your time?

What girls?

the girls that jerks are supposed to get, just by being jerks

 

[Shoggoth2588]

I'm a nice guy and things are going pretty damn well. Pessimists finish last.

 

[Anah'ya]

the girls that jerks are supposed to get, just by being jerks

The girls that fall for jerks that are just jerks first, normal human second, might be considered to be "stupid broads". The girls that fall for a jerk that just plays his roll well (aka: the alpha male) are just.. well.. your ordinary girls.

/shrug

Personal opinion.

 

[Raikov]

snip

No. It's because women (not only girls) gravitate towards the alpha male in a room. The alpha male is usually the one that others might consider a "jerk". Not talking idiotic ass-hat jerk that spouts mother jokes 24/7, drinks himself into oblivion and scratches his balls in front of his mother in law.

I've seen women go for both the "alpha male" and the complete asshats. This is not really a problem, dating is trial and error after all. What really bugs me is all those that after getting massively disappointed in their catch after a while, mostly because he didn't miraculously change his ways after meeting her, they dump him and go for another of the same type.

I've seen this soo many times lately it almost depresses me. I especially like the relationship one of my childhood friends have... she got pregnant, and gave birth to a baby girl just in time for the girls father to get out of jail. Aaaand then she got pissed that he was not the 'ideal father'. Go figure.

 

[ShadowKatt]

My only advice, get over it, find happiness somewhere else, stop seeking it from other people. You place your happiness in someone elses hands, then you give them the ability to take it away from you as well.

 

[Gavmando]

So i have decided that being a nice guy has no benifit in the real world, being a yessir man at work doesnt help and being really nice to women has me permanatly stuck as friends it sucks

No. Nice guys dont finish last, passive guys finish last. You can be assertive whilst being a nice guy.
You're probably basing your statement off seeing some absolute dickheads with hot women. They may be arseholes, but they're assertive. That's why they get what they want.
Unfortunately, it usually takes women years to realise that they're being treated like crap, and in that time you're left wondering why.

If you want something, make it clear. Accept no compromise, but dont be an arsehole about it. Stick to your beliefs and do what makes you happy. Talk to women like they're a real person and not a set of boobs.
And just remember, that feeling you have that you have no idea what you're doing, she has it too. So be gentle.