Guys that are shy around girls EVEN in online games

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Zeema

The Furry Gamer
Jun 29, 2010
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im not shy around girls when i play PS3.

for instance i played RDR today and all i did was imitate the Yogscast and saying

'IM PROFESSOR GRIZWALD'

apparently i sound alot like Grizwald


EDIT: just something i found Relevant
 

Fetzenfisch

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Sep 11, 2009
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i never joined a guild that allowed kids under 20 to join, so we usually had no such problems.
 

LawlessSquirrel

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Jun 9, 2010
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Well some people have a hard time detaching when they're online, so they're just as shy there as in real life. Alternatively, there are people that are MORE shy online, because they're too used to real life socialising and can't adjust. I'm more-so the latter than the former (although to an arguably small degree), because I'm big on the visual gestures and such which don't translate online well, but gender is irrelevant.

Although it does sound like the guy you mention is particularly shy. I would find anything beyond going quiet to be strange, but some people are just like that.
 

Twilightlord

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Jun 25, 2011
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Prince Regent said:
Guys....
I thought we'd all agreed on this: Rule 29: On the internet, all girls are men, and all kids are undercover FBI agents.
I was actually thinking the same thing lol.
But as someone said people are going to be people.
 

Gralian

Me, I'm Counting
Sep 24, 2008
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Akytalusia said:
i don't get it. i don't even see females when i play an mmo, i see the tank, the DD, the healer, ect. and they better all be doin' thier jobs. s'all that matters.
It doesn't work that way. No-one is entirely gender blind, or even sexuality blind. People absolutely react to people in different ways when they discover something personal about them. What you're talking about is only the case when there is an impersonal relationship; you know nothing about your party. But the difference is (i'm assuming) the awkward people the OP is talking about have discovered that the girls in the guild are actually girls, rather than the avatar of a girl. However, even in contrast to this, they don't have to claim to be a girl in real life for this sort of reaction. If a guy who appears at first to be a girl through their avatar and typing, and then announces they are male, people are going to have vastly altered opinions about him. You, me and the rest of us liberally minded individuals might be able to claim otherwise, but for the vast majority of people, this just isn't the case - no matter how much we try to dress it up. Men think of women differently than other men, and vice versa. This holds doubly true if there are two guys grinding or hanging out, and then one of them announces they are gay when before it was assumed they were straight; the other individual is going to react very awkwardly to that and probably think of the other differently from then on, whether that is right or not.

The point is that you can't just think of individuals as a tabula rasa for the game to project onto. At the end of the day, these are real people. You can't ignore the fact that your tank is female, or that the guildy you're chatting to is from Russia, or that the guild master you thought was female is actually a guy. In fact, i don't think i'll even say "in an ideal world we'd just think of people as their class roles rather than people", because it's those aspects of people that makes them more human, and we need to be reminded that we are playing with people, not just the AI. We should embrace the various identities that people become and project, but at the same time, you have to understand that some people may react awkwardly to it. There's nothing you can really do about this, except let them deal with it. Just don't be surprised when people react this way. It's human nature.

OpticalJunction said:
It isn't just an avatar, just like words on a screen aren't just pixels. They represent ideas, concepts, beliefs, and these things really do affect you at a subconscious level.
This, a thousand times. I'm so terribly sick of people who say "it's just pixels, yo". No. It isn't "just pixels", if there's a female night elf druid, then at the very base level people see that the avatar is female, and that is what they identify with that character. If someone plays a healer, people may assume that player prefers that role because they enjoy responsibility and helping people, or if they play a warrior, they like to be in charge and be a leader. Think that's overthinking it? A considerable number of tanks i have come across have generally considered themselves the leader of the group and find it frustrating and insulting when someone disrespects that position, by pulling a group instead of letting him do it, for example. (Even if the party is more than capable of dealing with it). We do and always will attribute things to avatars. They're not just characters in a game, they're the representations of people's personalities and persons, regardless of how minor on a psychological level it may be.
 

Seventh Actuality

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Apr 23, 2010
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SsilverR said:
I remember playing long sessions on certain mmos a while back with my cousin and a few friends i recently made online, there were a few girls in my guild and i remember a few grinding sessions where usually talkative guys either go completely silent or suddenly have to leave when they discover that one of the people they've been grinding and chatting with for the last hour was a girl.

I know it sounds ridiculous, i thought so too at first until one guy only started wanting to grind when i was alone XD i asked him up front if that was the reason and set up a kinda trap (i let my guildie in on it and she basically hid and was ready to pop up when a dropped the pm)
he denied it and got back to his usual chatty self when i gave the signal and she comes out swinging (verbally, and she didn't hold back on the fem talk .. lol she's usually not like that) "hey boys, how you been" ... she didn't finish typing her fourth sentence when **return scroll** he was goooone XD

didn't log back in for a while too, i was genuinely fascinated XD ... i mean ... it's avatars man .. do you guys know anyone who's shy even online behind a toon???
It's kind of understandable (shyness, that is, not upping and leaving instantly. That's just weird.). If they're that nervous around girls in real life then yeah, they'll be nervous around girls in whatever context. I say "they", but my thirteen year old self was like this - not shy so much as afraid of looking like an idiot/not wanting to say anything that wasn't clever and LOLsowitty.

It's pretty stupid, but at least it's not the misogynistic **** "No girls on the internet!" "TITS OR GTFO!" crowd (or the "my misogyny is TOTALLY IRONIC" crowd).
 

martin's a madman

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Aug 20, 2008
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I'm perfectly comfortable in front of a crowd, but I'm shy around women in person if it gets personal. Like, touching me and stuff.

A friend of mine in my chemistry class would touch me all the time because she knew it made me uncomfortable. She was trying to help me 'get over my fear of women'.

It was funny, and it wasn't as bad because I knew she was just doing it to bug me. If she were really coming on to me I'd be nervous as hell.


No, I'm not gay.
 
Sep 30, 2010
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Irridium said:
Could be worse. The guys could get overly-chatty to try and impress the girl. Yes it sounds stupid as hell, but I've seen(or rather, heard) it happens quite a bit on Xbox Live.
Yeah I've got a buddy like that, it's hilarious and yet amazing at the same time. It's almost like watching a train derail and crash in slow motion except a hell of a lot funnier
 

Dogstile

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Jan 17, 2009
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Not at all. Hell, my friends and I are actually friends with this girl we met on warcraft and I ended up dating her (twice!).

I don't understand why you would be nervous talking to someones avatar even if they were a girl.
 

ArbiterX13

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Jul 2, 2011
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I'm horrible at this. I'm also horrible at it in real life, though, so it makes sense. Unless they actually start up a conversation, chances are I'll just kinda watch them do whatever their doing (NOT stalkerish).