How do i get friends?
- Thread starter benbenthegamerman
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Honestly, is the american senior school system so fucked up for the people who are diverse?
I, myself has made a lot new friends when I started at the swedish equivalent of High school. That in no small part is due to we only have one large fucking High school where every 16-19 year old in the vicinity of my hometown goes, which that means I get to meet every lost friend from old schools and sports.
OT: Talk to people, share your interests with the world, that's the only way. I got a really good friend just by mentioning that my favourite band is Led Zeppelin in the food queue and rolled with the converstaion and gigs that came with.
I, myself has made a lot new friends when I started at the swedish equivalent of High school. That in no small part is due to we only have one large fucking High school where every 16-19 year old in the vicinity of my hometown goes, which that means I get to meet every lost friend from old schools and sports.
OT: Talk to people, share your interests with the world, that's the only way. I got a really good friend just by mentioning that my favourite band is Led Zeppelin in the food queue and rolled with the converstaion and gigs that came with.
Or just follow this tip, which, incidently just proofs my story above.TheYellowCellPhone said:
Just be yourself. I know how it is to be the "new kid" at school. Actually, i've been that enough times that I could probably write a book on it. But... don't let yourself become "different" or try to act in ways that you think will please others. That... does not end well at all, because you either are being used by others or you are betraying yourself.
You will get friends in time. You just have to give it a little bit of time and not appear to be trying too hard.
You will get friends in time. You just have to give it a little bit of time and not appear to be trying too hard.
I clicked on your profile and you have far more friends than I do. You get no sympathy from me.
I've got a lot of trouble opening up to people to begin with, and then it's hard for me to get them past the acquaintance level. All I can say is just go for it. Look for people you think might like you and just go for it. Then meet people you think would never like you and just go for it.
I know quite well how hard it can be to jump that hurdle, but set out to talk to people and when you feel that voice in the back of your head that says "they probably don't like me anyway," remember this: If you don't open up to them, they'll never like you, they won't even know you. You might be thinking, "But what if it doesn't go right?" A valid question, but beforehand, you were nobody to them. If all goes south then you'll be that weird new kid for a week or so before just being nobody again. If things go well, +1 friend! Just keep trying until you meet someone, because having one person to share your experiences and feelings with is leagues better than having nobody.
From there springboard from your one friend to his friends, and let it branch out from there. Most of my friends (myself included) were like that. From there it's much easier to open up if you've got someone backing you up to talk to their friends.
The whole not talking back thing and the implied "fuck off, I don't know you" attitude is just high school in general, everyone's always so self-conscious that they've got to be suspicious of everybody else outside of their group of friends. The hardest part is getting in, from there things get easier as you find people that like what you like. And don't be afraid to voice what you like once you become friends, as you may have more in common with other people than they first let on.
Lastly, there are other places besides school to make friends, such as youth groups, clubs, online forums, etc. Don't be afraid to try out new things to meet new people.
I know quite well how hard it can be to jump that hurdle, but set out to talk to people and when you feel that voice in the back of your head that says "they probably don't like me anyway," remember this: If you don't open up to them, they'll never like you, they won't even know you. You might be thinking, "But what if it doesn't go right?" A valid question, but beforehand, you were nobody to them. If all goes south then you'll be that weird new kid for a week or so before just being nobody again. If things go well, +1 friend! Just keep trying until you meet someone, because having one person to share your experiences and feelings with is leagues better than having nobody.
From there springboard from your one friend to his friends, and let it branch out from there. Most of my friends (myself included) were like that. From there it's much easier to open up if you've got someone backing you up to talk to their friends.
The whole not talking back thing and the implied "fuck off, I don't know you" attitude is just high school in general, everyone's always so self-conscious that they've got to be suspicious of everybody else outside of their group of friends. The hardest part is getting in, from there things get easier as you find people that like what you like. And don't be afraid to voice what you like once you become friends, as you may have more in common with other people than they first let on.
Lastly, there are other places besides school to make friends, such as youth groups, clubs, online forums, etc. Don't be afraid to try out new things to meet new people.
Not to be dickish, but it sounds like you have an excuse for not getting any friends. Take responsibility and realize there are reasons why they aren't talking to you and it's not because they're "twats". Sure, some are. There's going to be "twats" everywhere in life. I'm assuming they're not talking or befriending you because you seem like a downer and will reject everything with anger or skepticism. Brighten up. If you smile a lot, and say hi to people, they're more apt to approach you and feel comfortable around you. Otherwise, you'll just be known as a weird and miserable tosser.