how do you feel about being judged on your looks?

[Vault101]

I see, so its more of a social requirement that women look their best?

yeah...girls are generally expected to put more effort into their looks than guys...

or one hting i notice is you have an "average' looking guy with a beautiful women (again generally in the celebrity side of things) ..but the other way round? do you ever see that?

 

[Freaky Lou]

I sometimes post my picture hoping someone will judge me by my looks.

I'm not gorgeous or anything, but I am a handsome young man and that's just a little bit more that people will like me from the start.

 

[NotSoLoneWanderer]

People assume that I love sports, rap music, and the other indulgences of a young dark skinned person but a short conversation with me quickly changes those assumptions. Hate basketball and only somewhat enjoy playing football. Love all sorts of music and I hate rap that professes the "thug" lifestyle. Would rather read books or play video games. Besides I'm Ghanaian rather than typical African American. I wish there weren't but yes there is a difference.

 

[Something Amyss]

Apathetic. Although I probably don't want to be bothered with people who will judge me by my looks.

 

[Freaky Lou]

I see, so its more of a social requirement that women look their best?

yeah...girls are generally expected to put more effort into their looks than guys...

or one hting i notice is you have an "average' looking guy with a beautiful women (again generally in the celebrity side of things) ..but the other way round? do you ever see that?

My father is a lot more attractive than my mother, and none of the girlfriends I've had (2) were as conventionally attractive as me.

 

[Vault101]

obviously this is MUCH worse for women than it is for men (seriously) personally I really cant stand the Idea of being "rated" on my apearence...I also resent the fact that this has to be such a big deal, and the fact that a womenas attractiveness has to be one of her biggest assets

Seriously? Why'd you go there?

It isn't, men are judged by their appearance just as much as women, idealisation isn't gender selective.

no, I honestly think it IS worse ,yeah men do get judged on their looks

but the Idea of conforming to what is "beautiful" and "sexy" is drilled into girls by the media..you see it everywhere advertising...hell even the entertainment we consume because they ALWAYS use the matra "sex sells"

do you see an unattractive looking actress is a movie? if so they always draw attention to how fat/unattractive/mannish they are for laughs...

a womens "attractiveness" is seen as an asset, shes suposed to put alot of time money and effort into maintaning that....once she is past her peak she's no longer "vauled" where as men..in theroy at least when they are older are seen has having money/power/asets

now obviously Im generalising, I mean plenty of women get by fine..but you look at anything..say a video online and the first things thats going to come into question are the girls looks

 

[Vault101]

snip.

well I was generalising

Ive always found it odd people have the attitude of "beauitiful people must go with beautiful people"..like whats up with that?

 

[Biosophilogical]

I'm fairly self-conscious about my looks at times, but only at times. When I'm with someone who is attractive, I tend to worry more because I worry that hanging with me might hurt them socially (and I wouldn't want my friendship with someone to be a burden to them (even though they probably don't care whether it is or not)).

Also, I'm self-conscious about my teeth. I have pretty 'meh' teeth. A few chips, slightly stained, a few obvious surface-imperfections. Let's just say I do not have the nicest smile, and I sure as hell know it (but I'm working on it, and being at university is a great social-boost, so it worries me less than it did).

EDIT: Also, photos are a massive blow to my self-esteem because I always end up looking like a deranged serial killer.

 

[Grimh]

I'm totally okay with it. But then again, I'm a godly-sexy-man-beast.
Incidentally does anyone know where I can buy mirrors?

 

[Seanfall]

I'm fat, wear glasses, have long hair, and a wild beard. I pretty much ignore it. School knocked my propensity to give a fuck about what others think down to pretty much zero. That girl giving me the "please don't rape me" look, the teenagers who are retarded when it comes to insults(seriously, the bland comments that I get from kids nowadays make me weep. They were much more inventive when I was in school), the "I'm better than you" stare-down I get from complete strangers that you just know comes from me being fat. I've been given worse. Much worse.

Fat, long hair, glasses, and a wild beard....BROTHER!? have I found you long last? Seriously I'm fat, with long hair, glasses and my beard can get out of control. Are you blonde with Blue eyes? Cause if you are then my dad has some explaining to do.

Yeah same here about school. I never had a girl give me that don't rape me look. Not that they have gave the 'come here and get some big boy' look either. I got so sick of people calling me names that I just turned off my ability to care about the opinions of others. Mostly that is.

I think I got that stare-down at work once. Oddly from someone twice as fat as me....It's an odd and weary world we live in.

 

[BehattedWanderer]

I'm okay with it. I do it to them, they should fairly do it to me. But, beyond looks, I can cook, I can laugh, I've almost always got a good joke, I'm reasonably witty, my peep bends up a little bit for damn near the perfect angle for that special front and center bit, I'm fantastic at cuddling, I listen to people, I prefer someone who is more independent, I'm pretty smart, have a good education and lots of hobbies, enjoy increasing my vocabulary, and at current, I have a decent job. I may not be the sexiest man to walk the streets, and I've been shaping up and losing weight of late, and have a fair supply of good genes, so I'm really okay with it. They can judge looks if they want. That's fine. If they like what they see, they'll stick around, and find out about all my other great qualities.

 

[Eddie the head]

I was told that I had the appearance of a cereal killer and if they were to see me at night they'd run the other direction.

I guess thats why I'm a loner..

My best friend gets that. I just get asked all the time "how do you get your hair like that?" I am a guy so I never have an answer.

 

[Dogstile]

I see, so its more of a social requirement that women look their best?

yeah...girls are generally expected to put more effort into their looks than guys...

or one hting i notice is you have an "average' looking guy with a beautiful women (again generally in the celebrity side of things) ..but the other way round? do you ever see that?

I have a tall, thin blonde friend who's going out with a short fat bloke. You see it.

 

[2fish]

I use it to my advantage. Days I have to ride the bus or deal with other forms of public transportation I get out my best metal shirt, headphones, and my "what do you want now worm?" face. People don't sit next to me unless they are either a very brave or b really want that seat.

Down side is religious people sometimes want to save me when in this persona.

By altering how you stand, speak, walk, ect you can alter how you are perceived, this is a great tool. At meeting where I was brought to evaluate sides and if we could work with them I would be the little mouse intern face with a slight slouch. It was great to see what people said in front of me when my boss was out of earshot.

Down side can be people try to dismiss your ideas unless boss character backs it.

Use human nature to your advantage, you can't fix it, use it!

 

[Doclector]

Well being pretty much the ugliest thing ever to walk this earth, I'm damn well used to it.

Problem is, I've become reverse discriminatory. I tend to initially be defensive and harsh towards good looking people. Sometimes, these people don't know what it's like to be judged negatively by your looks. They are over priviliged, and thus, probably don't even know how cruel they're being. They don't know how it feels to be looked at as an abomination, how are they to know how bad it feels?

Most good looking people aren't like that though. Plenty of my best friends are good looking people, even good looking girls. I know this, yet I can't shake this suspicion and distrust. Recently, I learned of a few people I knew who did modelling. I don't tend to speak to them much anymore. I don't feel I have a right to. Why should they be forced to cope with seeing something like me? They aren't like me. They don't have to stay amongst ugly people, why would they?

It doesn't make sense. I fear at some point, I may have to face up to the fact that there are no rules to normal human interaction, that every move you make in that game is a mere roll of the dice, a game of chance as to whether your responses affect them well or badly.

Hell, I have plenty of friends. I don't know many people who are more popular around the uni than me, yet I can't shake the feeling that although people like me for my personality, they're all disgusted to look at me. And as for relationships? Forget it. In a normal town it would be nigh on impossible. Here, where the girls all seem to look perfect? They can do far, far better than me, and they know it.

So, yeah. I guess I care. I'm used to it, but I still care.

 

[Shadow flame master]

The closest I've come to judging someone on their looks is whenever I see someone in school in pajamas and hair rollers, etc. etc.

As for me, I have a nice build, and my mom's friend says that I have a body of a swimmer: long arms, slender body. My face could use some work seeing as I have some bumps and a pimple every now-and-then. You know: teenage hormone crap.

If I wanted to actually try to look good to other people, then I would have to change my entire wardrobe for that to happen. That would mean me buying ten pairs of shoes, different colored socks, lots of name-brand clothes (Levi, etc.) and other crap that is very expensive for me.

That's why I'm fine with the way I look and dress now, because giving that much of a damn of what other people see me as is wallet draining for a person who doesn't have a job.

 

[Chanel Tompkins]

I've gotten bashed for my looks so often I've honestly stopped giving a damn. It's like, yeah, I'm not the most attractive thing you've ever seen, either go off laughing with your friends or try something else. Most of you will be back when you're lost on an assignment and I'm the only one with the answers.