How much to kill your beloved family pet?

[BartyMae]

Intellectually, I suppose I can see myself doing it for a load of money.

But then I see my pet's faces, and actually imagine me doing it...and nope, can't see myself doing it for any amount of money. I don't think I could ever live with myself after that.

 

[Slvrwolfen]

Only for a seriously absurd amount of money, in the event that no accusations would rise and no taxing would happen. Absurd being in the billions. It'd be painful, but considering financial situations... Cold logic. :|

 

[malestrithe]

Not going to kill my cat for money. Survival is another matter.

 

[Ectoplasmicz]

I just...I couldn't bring myself to do it. I love my dog too much.

I would take the money and the-

I'd take the money and beat him with the mallet.

Ah, beat me to it. Well, I'd do this.

 

[Verzin]

The old man can go fuck himself. I'll just take the money and beat him to death. I like my cat.

 

[Guffe]

A small mallet? fuck no!
If I'd get to put a bullet through the head of the poor thing and 50 million euros I will take the gun but I am not sure I could pull the trigger. I've only had 2 pet rats and no way I could do that to them not to think about dogs or cats.

 

[idarkphoenixi]

I own a parrot, so it's pretty hard to kill something literally capable of begging for it's life...now I'm depressed.

The idea of killing one of my pets with a mallet is just... no

Fuck I need cheering up

IT'S NOT ENOUGH!

 

[Hazy992]

I own a parrot, so it's pretty hard to kill something literally capable of begging for it's life...now I'm depressed.

The idea of killing one of my pets with a mallet is just... no

Fuck I need cheering up

IT'S NOT ENOUGH!

Watch it again! WATCH IT AGAIN!

 

[Fappy]

I'd take the money and beat him with the mallet.

This!

Fuck you old man!

 

[Canadamus Prime]

I'd take the money and beat him with the mallet.

Yeah, that. He can enjoy his own pain.

 

[chiggerwood]

To get to my dog Dory you would have to kill me first. Ain't no way I'd ever harm her, you sick bastard

 

[DEAD34345]

Not gunna happen, and it'd be incredibly difficult for me to resist outright assaulting the guy for even suggesting the idea. I would also inform the RSPCA, the police, and anyone else who would listen that this guy was dangerous and wants animals to be beaten to death with a mallet. Hopefully he and anyone who actually took him up on the offer would be thrown into gaol for a long, long time, but considering the laws concerning the safety of animals, that would sadly be very unlikely.

 

[Girl With One Eye]

I don't have any pets so I can't really relate to this. Considering my current financial situation I'd take at least £1000, that should sort me out for a while.

Also, this thread reminds me of a scene in Elfen Lied.

 

[RJ 17]

The idea of killing one of my pets with a mallet is just... no

Fuck I need cheering up

I'm exceedingly happy to see that I'm not the only person who has seen both the gayest and greatest video on youtube (before you posted it in this topic, that is)!

OP: Good god that's a brutal hypothetical scenario. I'd tell the guy to fuck off because 1: I'm not a heartless, money-grubbing bastard and 2: I wouldn't want all the hassles that come with just suddenly being handed a massive amount of money.

 

[MetalMagpie]

No. No matter what the method - or even if I could get someone else to do it - I wouldn't kill a pet for money.

I'm financially comfortable as I am. I'm not rich, but I'm a long way from starving to death on the streets. Beyond the amount I need to get by, money is just not worth that much to me.

 

[GigaHz]

Snip

If it was my dog, I'd do it for approximately $2.50

My cats on the other hand, probably a good $500,000.

For the record I don't hate dogs, mine just so happens to be a real bastard. My girlfriend loves him to death though so I can't get rid of him.

 

[DuelLadyS]

I'll ask the old man to make his offer again while I filmed him with my phone/camera, as a 'visual contract', if you will.

Then I'd tell him to hand over 10 million, lest he find this evidence of his lil' 'hobby' in the hands of the authorities.

My kitty Scully may have just had her 15th birthday, but she's in extremely good health for her age and I see no reason to change that.

Maybe I teach my sister's lil' schauzer mix to play dead REALLY well...

 

[Erana]

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I'd take the money and beat him with the mallet.

Yep.

When my dog died, I grieved for months, and I still cry about it sometimes. She was just such a perfect animal for our situation and had such personality and never caused trouble...
I couldn't live with myself if I had done that, I'd just feel inhuman. No amount of money could heal that psychological trauma, especially after the wealthy people in my life giving no fucks about me and being miserable, selfish people.
I'd feel just like them and I'd hate myself even more for it.

 

[DudeistBelieve]

I'll ask the old man to make his offer again while I filmed him with my phone/camera, as a 'visual contract', if you will.

Then I'd tell him to hand over 10 million, lest he find this evidence of his lil' 'hobby' in the hands of the authorities.

My kitty Scully may have just had her 15th birthday, but she's in extremely good health for her age and I see no reason to change that.

Maybe I teach my sister's lil' schauzer mix to play dead REALLY well...

All you people with the authorities.... HE'S RICH. Theres no way he'd go to jail. He'd just buy off the police.

"Everyone's got a price, everyone's going to pay, cause the million dollar man ALWAYS gets his way."


Seriously if I was rich, I'd have that playing everywhere I went.