How to ask a girl out (Operation 7)

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

Sooo... This girl I have liked for a really, really long time is single again... and well, I need advice on how to ask a girl out. I have been receving way to much advice from my friends about what to do, each one controdicts the other. I NEED HELP FROM SMART PEOPLE! Ever sense last week, a bunch of shit has been going through my head on what to do, and why things have happened in the past. I still have to work with my shitty highschool, writing a book, and dealing with... you know... girls. I have attempted 6 times in the past to ask her, 5 of which I couldn't even get the question out! (mostly because she already had a boyfriend and I figured it out before I asked) So now it is attempt 7! Lucky number 7, amirite bungi?????? So I am seeking your advice, I plan to ask her next week, but I wanted to know more steps to it, some of my friends say I should try to hang out with her first, others say I should just come clean and ask her... God my head hurts from this. I have more important things to deal with, but this is distracting me. (God ADD is a curse...) So, sense this forums full of intelegent people, I hope one of you has advice on the oposite gender! So yeah... please help!

OHH I forgot another thing, I have to prepair for a Left 4 Dead 2 tournement at my school, HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO CONCENTRATE ON A HORDE OF ZOMBIES WITH ONE OF THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRLS ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET ON MY MIND?

 

[Olorune]

Yeah, I'm actually going through the exact same problem. I was just gonna go up and ask her if she wanted to hang out on the weekend.

 

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

just ask her out at the next opportunity so you can get it out of the way. if she says no, thats fine because you needed to get over her anyway.

I've tried this 6 times, I am not fast enough, once I missed the operotenity by a couple minuites... My luck sucks.

 

[vento 231]

I don't know if you'd consider me a smart person, but ask her out next time your alone, rather face the truth than spend the rest of your life wondering.

 

[SimuLord]

Getting up the courage to ask is 9001x more difficult than actually asking.

"Hey, let me buy you a cup of coffee/lunch/dinner" is all you really need.

 

[Lord Krunk]

Eh, I'd leave it for a while to be honest. Trust me, you'll just be a rebound if you do.

 

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

Getting up the courage to ask is 9001x more difficult than actually asking.

"Hey, let me buy you a cup of coffee/lunch/dinner" is all you really need.

huh, that ones new. I think I might use that on other girls if I can't get her, right now I am sort of leaning toward "Hey, would you like to see a movie with me sometime?"

 

[p3t3r]

well do you actually know her like talk on a regular basis? if so skip to part 2
1) well perhaps you should talk to here a little bit you know get warmed up stop being a stranger.

2) just go up to her and ask if she wants to hangout. person is preferable but if you are really having trouble then i guess you can go the tech route view text or Facebook or whatever

 

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

Eh, I'd leave it for a while to be honest. Trust me, you'll just be a rebound if you do.

I'm wating a bit to ask her, I'm thinking another week, week and a half.

 

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

just ask her out at the next opportunity so you can get it out of the way. if she says no, thats fine because you needed to get over her anyway.

I've tried this 6 times, I am not fast enough, once I missed the operotenity by a couple minuites... My luck sucks.

omg thats my point, don't try to 'prepare' for asking her out, just go and do it next time you see her. in fact, if you think you might miss the opportunity, go over and do it RIGHT NOW.

The thing is she just broke up with her boyfriend a week ago... Wouldn't I seem like a rebounder thing if I did that?

 

[MetalPhoenix]

How long is she single?

I don't think it would be smart to ask her out right after she broke up with someone. Give it some time







*disclaimer: this is coming from a guy who is very inexperienced at this and has no experience in relations whatsoever

edit: damn ninja's

 

[Sarahcidal]

just ask her out. ask her to a movie or something then dinner.. like as though youre asking your buddy.. you dont need to be her boyfriend instantly, especially if she just broke up with a guy.. it may be cliche but we ladies dig a guy with confidence... whats the worst that could happen? she says no and you go back to where you started... or she says yes and you get yourself a potential mate.. it wont kill you to ask th girl out dude.. just go for it and good luck!

 

[SimuLord]

Getting up the courage to ask is 9001x more difficult than actually asking.

"Hey, let me buy you a cup of coffee/lunch/dinner" is all you really need.

huh, that ones new. I think I might use that on other girls if I can't get her, right now I am sort of leaning toward "Hey, would you like to see a movie with me sometime?"

To quote my Business Writing professor: "Don't ever give the other person an easy way to say no."

"Would you like to see a movie with me sometime" gives her PLENTY of opportunity to string you along---and it shows NO confidence at all from you. It's a no-balls question.

If you're going to ask a girl out, you give her a concrete set of things you intend to do (I usually ask girls out fairly spontaneously, but if I've the future in mind, I'll append a date and time, like "Let's go out for coffee. 2:30, after class tomorrow sound good for you? Coffee's on me.") I find that women are far less likely to say no if you put them on the spot, and once I have the girl in the Starbucks I make with the jokes and the charm and lo and behold, I'm starting to think I couldn't stay single if I tried.

 

[Lord Krunk]

Eh, I'd leave it for a while to be honest. Trust me, you'll just be a rebound if you do.

I'm wating a bit to ask her, I'm thinking another week, week and a half.

Thing is, while the longer you wait the better your chances are of working, the tension builds as well.

I'd heartily recommend, if you're a bit shy, donning a 'get it over and done with' attitude and telling her your feelings at some point. That is, depending on how well you know her and how well she knows you.

 

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

Getting up the courage to ask is 9001x more difficult than actually asking.

"Hey, let me buy you a cup of coffee/lunch/dinner" is all you really need.

huh, that ones new. I think I might use that on other girls if I can't get her, right now I am sort of leaning toward "Hey, would you like to see a movie with me sometime?"

To quote my Business Writing professor: "Don't ever give the other person an easy way to say no."

"Would you like to see a movie with me sometime" gives her PLENTY of opportunity to string you along---and it shows NO confidence at all from you. It's a no-balls question.

If you're going to ask a girl out, you give her a concrete set of things you intend to do (I usually ask girls out fairly spontaneously, but if I've the future in mind, I'll append a date and time, like "Let's go out for coffee. 2:30, after class tomorrow sound good for you? Coffee's on me.") I find that women are far less likely to say no if you put them on the spot, and once I have the girl in the Starbucks I make with the jokes and the charm and lo and behold, I'm starting to think I couldn't stay single if I tried.

Again, your intentions are good, but to me that sounds a bit cocky... Something I can't be with the subject with the oposite gender... It's just some weird thing I have, mabey it is just becuase I have too much shit on my mind right now...

 

[alittlepepper]

As a girl, my first and only real recommendation(s) lies as follows:

Be confident.
Be relatively straightforward.
Make it (the date) a common interest.
Have a plan for if she says yes, but be prepared to let it go if she says no.

Confidence, at least for me, is everything. People that don't act or seem like they know what they're doing or saying is such a huge mood killer for me. If you've been her friend for a while, then you know what she likes. Find an event that keys into those interests...ideally that line up nicely with your own...and tell her about them. Then say "Hey, I was going to go check it out, want to go with me?" or something like that.
But for God's sake, be cool. Be calm. Confident. It implies solidity, strength. (Also known as: Intriguing.)
Best of luck, mate.

 

[Tonythion]

Are you already friends with her? You don't want to just bound up to her and ask her out when she has no idea who you are.

If your are already cool with each other, wait till you're not a rebound and ask her if she would like to hang out. Or that you SHOULD hang out. Something simple like SimuLord said. Coffee, lunch, movie, just chatting.

If you don't know her all that well, get to know her first but don't act that friendly...or the dreaded friend zone will come and bite you in the ass. Don't be the brother she alwasys wanted haha.

oh like MetalPhoenix: *disclaimer: this is coming from a gay man who has had many girls wanting to jump him.