Hypothetical: If you died, and (Let's Assume Christian) God is waiting for you...
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id ask him why he made my grand dad have to be in hospital having to get a hip replacement then die in pain due to and organ failure. ive always been told god decides everything so id ask why he decided that should happen and probably either like him or hate his guts depending on the answer i get.
Imply that I'm disappointed that it's the Christian God instead of a being that was given a little more personality by the people that made it up.
i'll be like soooooo ..... any good bars around here? No? ok i'm going to hell in a bit biatch! lol
Id look em up and down and say "Lololol take the disguise off" and then the spy from TF2 would appear and we would do battle for eternity. THATS what would happen sir.
I'd give him a knuckle-bump and proceed directly to hell.
I'm counting on being one of the people who do absolutely fuck-all during the Rapture.
Yay me.
I'm counting on being one of the people who do absolutely fuck-all during the Rapture.
Yay me.
Well that's all well and good, except he's the Christian God so it's more of an insecure, bipolar, mass-murderer sort of attitude. He forgives you IF you believe in him and accept his only son as your personal savior, the one who died on the cross for your sins. Otherwise, you're SOL! {And if that's the case then I'll see you in hellMozared said:
}First I'd ask questions. Lot's of questions. And then...I don't know, I'm no longer Christian...I don't even understand how we can be the same person in the afterlife that we are now if we have individualism exist at all. More likely it's a oneness with the energy that is converted into mass that makes up life as we know it. Who know's what reality is when our law's, by all arguments sake, cease to have any merit.
But lets say I do go to a heaven. We all are products of our enviroment's, made to survive by any means necissary. If Jesus or God (or trinity, or whatever) has a beef with anything I've done, well, they could have spoken up and actually taught, but since their is nothing but what humanity teaches, I think I'll just walk through the arch and start my afterlife since I was given the gift to see myself in the afterlife anyways. Why even bother to put on the show of possible afterlife if in 30 sec's theyre going to say "sorry, you publically urinated...down to hell you go"? Especially since Time probably doesn't really exist in that realm anyways, so all would have been a potential of already preordained tasks.
But after the questions, I think I'd start by flying really fast through mountains.
But lets say I do go to a heaven. We all are products of our enviroment's, made to survive by any means necissary. If Jesus or God (or trinity, or whatever) has a beef with anything I've done, well, they could have spoken up and actually taught, but since their is nothing but what humanity teaches, I think I'll just walk through the arch and start my afterlife since I was given the gift to see myself in the afterlife anyways. Why even bother to put on the show of possible afterlife if in 30 sec's theyre going to say "sorry, you publically urinated...down to hell you go"? Especially since Time probably doesn't really exist in that realm anyways, so all would have been a potential of already preordained tasks.
But after the questions, I think I'd start by flying really fast through mountains.
I'd ask why he gave me all of those lemons through out life. I don't know how to make lemonade.
If i were there I would go O RLY? then get bashed down to hell for quoting a meme...
but then if I say that in hell I might get shot up there because no one likes over used memes..
but then if I say that in hell I might get shot up there because no one likes over used memes..
Weird... Didn't think I was going here. Remember the thing with the nun? And the thing with the Hospital? and the thing with the Orphanage? Thought so, now send me where I'm supposed to go. OH CRAP, I forgot about the thing with the kittens.
I'd ask him for the proof of his existance whereas he answers:
"I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing."
"But," say Man, "the Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED."
"Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't though of that" and promply vanishes in a puff of logic.
"I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing."
"But," say Man, "the Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED."
"Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't though of that" and promply vanishes in a puff of logic.
God is visiting the Prisons he created now? To talk to the liars, the heretics, the blasphemers, the usurers, and those that do not follow his stringent laws concerning how we run our daily lives?
Then I suppose I'd ask him why he was so wrathful in our early stages of civilization, damning entire societies, indirectly causing the suppression of scientific and political advancement for 600 years.
Or, you know, I could ask him to see his video collection--"Gods Greatest Hits" sort of thing.
Then I suppose I'd ask him why he was so wrathful in our early stages of civilization, damning entire societies, indirectly causing the suppression of scientific and political advancement for 600 years.
Or, you know, I could ask him to see his video collection--"Gods Greatest Hits" sort of thing.