I am not even sure how to react to this..

[PickledMonkey]

Maybe OP, you should come clean and tell her about the wonder boy you met at the bar.

OT: If this troubles you, talk to her about it. Maybe this is an issue far deeper than a misunderstanding of gender roles, and it has just come up to the surface in her doubting your sexuality. But seriously, talk it out.

 

[The Serpent]

How would you react if you were in my place? What do you think about my situation?

"You're going to regret bringing this up when you see my beard!"

No, actually I would consider bringing up that losing sexual interest in your partner can happen at any time, and for a number of reasons. Aging, weight-gain, weight-loss. Turning out to be gay should be the least of her worries. Also what do people have against bi-sexual people? If she can handle your femininity, then what does it matter if you are only attracted to her friends and sister, or if you're attracted to her brother and exes as well? You're still fantasizing about other people.

That should make her feel better!

...


On second thought; don't say any of that to her. Sorry.

 

[Kryzantine]

Now, I object to these notions that baking, fashion and cooking are feminine notions. I know a ton of guys who enjoy cooking. Especially among Russians here, cooking is just something that both sexes can easily do. In fact, cooking is a very badass, and very useful skill to have. And as for fashion, I mean, I don't know of one guy that doesn't love a good suit. I can argue fashion with some of my friends, female and male. And I am straight as an arrow.

Perhaps she wants you to be a bit more manly, so do something badass for her. Bonus points if it involves cooking, baking or fashion in any way.

 

[gazumped]

My reaction would be "Why does it WORRY you? WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST BI PEOPLE? :/"

That may be because I'm bi. Although to be honest, I think it'd be my reaction either way.

 

[mountie218]

The simplest thing to do would be to simply assure her that she has nothing to worry about. You have eyes for her, and only her.

 

[Singularly Datarific]

Just reassert you masculity some way in front of her. Lift some weights in the rain or have an affair, then she will know you are heterosexual.

Have her "catch" you watching very straight porn, perhaps?

 

[evilneko]

Ask if she wants to watch you have sex with another man, with a completely straight face implying you are dead serious and would actually do it if she said yes.

Don't forget to set up a hidden camera to capture her reaction.

 

[standokan]

Grow a beard, that ought to prove her wrong.

 

[MasterOfHisOwnDomain]

The most worrying thing about that is why she thinks that she would have to worry if you were bisexual. That rather suggests that she has some underlying paranoia in my opinion. You shouldn't have to prove your heterosexuality.

 

[PeePantz]

Her asking you this is really her way of asking if you might be gay. Although she asked if you were bisexual, she was really trying to ask if you were very deep in the closet gay. She only used the word bisexual to spare the two of you the perceived harshness of that question.

I "get" her questioning. If her friends and her/your acquaintances are always questioning your sexual orientation, the confidence to the contrary might wane a little.

What if all your friends and mutual people of the two of you kept telling you that she might be cheating on you? Also, they give examples of why she might be (missing during peculiar times, hanging out with a guy friend too much, questioning your sexuality). Eventually, you'd cave from hearing it too much and ask her about it. All it takes is a little planted doubt to ask a question even if you feel strongly that the doubt is incorrect.

From personal experience (my sexuality being questioned), I wouldn't get offended. If anything it should be a compliment. Basically, insecure people are saying you look good and know your way around a kitchen. I understand it's strange to be asked by a girlfriend (I've been there), but just realize it's due to social harping and nothing from you.

 

[Nickompoop]

She may not be comfortable with having a boyfriend who likes things that are usually seen as feminine. Try taking up a manly hobby, like lifting weights or buying the Dirty Harry boxed set. Grow a Mann Co. mustache.

 

[darkorion69]

I would tell her that of course I was bi-sexual (because I am), and that being attracted to both sexes does not mean I am that much more likely to cheat or leave her.

For you however, I would suggest reminding her that Reality TV trades heavily in melodrama and that you have no intention to leave her for another woman, or another man for that matter. It might also be interesting to see if she has a bad opinion/has had some bad experiences with bisexual men ending relationships with her, or if the TV Show just triggered mild insecurity.

 

[Bags159]

Add words like "Steak", "Football", and "Beer" into your everyday conversation to assert your masculinity.

This is actually an awesome idea - just do it ironically, so that you're clearly trying to prove a point to her until she says "OK, fine, I get it"

I got the idea from an episode of Psych. I can't remember why, but they were randomly throwing around manly buzz words.

 

[barash]

Stop doing dishes, leave dirty clothes all over the place (especially the bathroom sink), walk inside in freshly mudded boots and stuff like that. You know, sterotypically 'male dbag behaviour'. When she starts complaining, ravage her over the couch or kitchen table, then whisper; still think I like men?

Should get your point across rather clearly


Don't blame me when she takes a pair of scissors to your balls late at night though..

 

[StBishop]

First, some background, I suppose. I am guy who loves fashion, cooking and baking, and a few other feminine things. I have a girlfriend of almost a year. Now, I am very comfortable in the fact that I am straight, that's why I'm able to do those things that I love. I don't really care if someone thinks I'm gay, I just know that they're wrong.

However, last night my girlfriend asked me if '[she]was ever going to have to worry that I was bisexual.' I was kind of stunned. I am not bisexual, I've never been attracted to any guys. I've never had any trouble with people thinking I'm not straight before, but the last person I expected to have suspicions was my girlfriend. Her reasoning was that I like baking and fashion. She said she had been watching some show called 'Happily Divorced.' (I've never seen the show, but apparently it's about a husband of 18 years who suddenly comes out as gay to his wife).

Now, as the title of this thread indicates, I don't know how to react. I didn't really get as angry as I think I should have. If anything, I was kind of amused. Thinking about it though, it was kind of horrible. Not only was she questioning my sexuality (which she, of all people, should be pretty sure about), she was basing it on some truly awful stereotypes. Now, I love her, and I'm not going to dump her. This was just kind of a really weird and jarring experience.. I guess what I'm asking is: How would you react if you were in my place? What do you think about my situation?

In addition to what you mentioned you might take issue with her "worrying" about you being bisexual. Bisexuality is a problem? News to me.

I wouldn't have been offended, I've had people straight out ask me about my sexuality because I get naked in front of people (irrespective of gender) on a somewhat regular basis and apparently that's a gay trait, I am also rather slim and have a soft voice, many people consider this effeminate. I don't but then again I think cooking can be manly, (eg. I cooked a hearty beef stew for dinner).

I wouldn't worry too much man.

 

[Dags90]

Download some gay porn and show her your lack of tumescence?

 

[Zenron]

I wouldn't really say that's her fault for asking that question. Blame society or something. No real reason to get offended by it, it's just that doing feminine things is perceived as being a homosexual, which of course is ludicrous, but that's just the way things are I guess. As long as you don't start doing guys I'm sure things are going to be ok between you two.

Anyway, what you should have done is just pick her up and throw her onto the bed right there and then. Then... y'know... prove your manliness?*cough*

 

[BlackWidower]

I'd be insulted, and it might make me think wheater I want to be with someone who is that biased/stupid. Confusing stereotypes with reality. I'd be insulted too man. Considering I also like cooking and baking and am a huge fan of My Little Pony, I could also fall victim to that stereotype...and shit like Will and Grace isn't helping.

 

[brinvixen]

As a young woman myself, if my boyfriend were into fashion and cooking, I wouldn't think he was bisexual, I'd think he was damn near perfect. It's very rare you find a guy who actually cares about what he puts on (I'm in college, so its sweatpant-du-jour) or can make a proper meal. Definitely positive qualities and definitely not signs of male homosexuality. Unless you play by stereotypes or something. Anyway, if she upset you then you should tell her. Ask her how'd she'd feel about if you called her bi because (errrr...) she liked football or wanted to cut her hair short(then ask her how stereotypical those things sound, just like you being bi because you like to cook). But definitely have a conversation about it, because if not, not only are you going to stay upset, but she might be sitting around contemplating your sexuality every other day. And if she thinks that seriously, it's time to let her go. There are girls who are going to find those qualities awesome and not the least bit bisexual. Sexuality is determined by who someone is attracted to, not the stuff they like to do.