I don't understand what people find so attractive about women. What is it and why?

[darkstarangel]

As a woman its not really something for you to understand as we men are wired differently by means of attraction. As a man I cant possibly hope to understand the female obsession for shoes.

Its the curviness & smooth skin. The profile of the face & the personality of a woman that accentuates. BTW boobs are freakin awesome! The way they jiggle, the way they stand out compared to the rest of the body. And the arse, especially one that wiggles when you girls walk is mesmerising, like a ripe peach waiting to be bitten into mmmmmm.

Aside from those there is some chemistry that develops within us since childhood, probably the pheromones, probably the testosterone hit during puberty when we see girls differently (with a buzz down our pants). And when we're feeling affectionate & romantic, or just downright horny a girl is the sweet innocent fragile doll that we want to seize with our arms, grope like an octopus & devour with our mouths & other appendages.

And thats the male mind all summed up two & a half paragraphs. I suppose you cant really understand why men are attracted to women until you've understood why you as a woman are attracted to a man.

 

[hashtag]

I don't get whats attractive about men. Its just...people are wired for different things.

 

[Mookowicz]

Many men are predisposed to like the sound of women, the sight of women and the smell of women. Our behaviour changes if we know that there's a woman in the room.

But on an intellectual basis, women think differently and the differences can be challenging, stimulating and refreshing. My gay friends enjoy the company of women too.

 

[A Free Man]

snip.

No offence, but I think if you have to ask you'll never really get it. It's not like everyone who is attracted to women had a big group meeting and decided what the most attractive traits are. Basically you just see something and appreciate the beauty of it or you don't. Me and my mates constantly argue over little things that we do or don't find attractive -- in a totally cool and non sexist way -- but in the end it just comes down to personal preference.

 

[RatRace123]

That's fair, I don't get what people find attractive about men.

Men are shapeless, sometimes hairy, and we look completely shitty when the soft, romantic glow of the moonlight bathes our faces.

Women are curvy, smooth and soft, and happen to look great during a romantic, moonlit night.

 

[LilithSlave]

Well, one produces milk.

Actually, while it is rare, it is possible for a male to lactate.

Secondly, something seems wrong about a man being attracted to lactation. It has to do with feeding babies. Not adult men, babies. And being attracted to lactation seems like a twist to one's sexuality. Because the first thing that should come to someone's mind if they think of lactation should be children. Not "that turns me on".

Man boobs don't have the same shape. They are triangular, while lady boobs are round, and the mammary tissue makes them bouncy.

Eh, a lot of that roundness comes from bra shaping, not mammary glands. Breasts would have the tendency to hang and go to sides and generally have a more "triangular" shape weren't it for the prevalence of bras.

They in fact, have a surprisingly similar shape in general. There are all sorts of boobs, but I don't think women's boobs are naturally as round as we tend to think them. We're just used to them being that way because we all start wearing bras as soon as we have anything. Even if ours are too small to need bras. It's kind of ridiculous, actually. This need to have a bra like a rite of passage or to feel more adult or teenage or some odd reason.

Oh yeah, and the fact that many men pressure us to feel bigger is probably an influence on that.

What I REALLY don't understand is why people find women and men with their bones jutting up under the skin, with visible ribs and spine, attractive. That is the most physically unattractive thing I can think of.

I agree with that.

 

[Ninjat_126]

You can give a typical expected answer of "oh God this question is stupid. It's of course because evolutionary reproductive biology men are meant to be attracted to women and women are meant to be attracted to men blahblahblah" but that doesn't actually answer my question.

Yes, it does. Male brains, in most cases, are wired to be attracted to women, and women's brains are wired to be attracted to men. Your question is like asking why humans enjoy eating food so much- it's just part of what makes us human.

Continuing the food analogy, homosexuals just have different tastebuds. I'm not sure where true asexuals stand on this, aside from the obvious "people who don't eat food and starve".

 

[drummond13]

Honestly? You don't sound bisexual. At all. I don't mean this in a bad way; many of my friends are gay. But I've never met a heterosexual or bisexual male who would even ask themselves the question you are posing, let alone this forum.

 

[Stg]

At first this sounded like some fatty got rejected by the guy she was pining over, but now it seems you have realized the very simple fact that the majority of the vain world wishes to ignore and trying to rationalize it. The simple fact is that women are pretty damned gross when you take everything into account (not just the side they show everyone in public). Coming from a straight male who has had several long-term relationships in the past and is currently in a long-term relationship now, I can safely say that women gross me out more than guys but only on a level that they let you in on. Still, even though I'm straight, I appreciate a beautiful person regardless of gender but I am only sexually attracted to women. I have my standards - beautiful face and a personality I can relate to is all I really care about - body type be damned. There is your answer: people are attracted to different things, deal with it. I say this only because you will probably never understand why someone is sexually attracted to animals and not humans or sexually attracted to children but not adults. They are attracted to what they are attracted to and if you must delve into their subconscious in order to realize that then I suggest you take a few steps back to look at the big picture instead of picking apart the tiny pixels on the screen.

Regardless, this is a rather pointless topic and shouldn't have been made. You went wrong by asking the general public a general question and expecting a specific answer to fit into your personal attractions.

As for your "I don't understand why men are generally sexist around other men" it goes back to the way we are wired from the start. Look at animals. The alpha male gets his pick of the females and leads the pack. The same thing applies to most men. The alpha male is the leader and the rest are followers - followers are weaker than the leader and this is usually picked up by women. Me, I'm pretty damned awesome so I had no trouble finding my girlfriend (or any of my past ones) when I was alone or with friends. Some people get caught up in the whole "my (insert object) is better than yours" superiority complex. I find those people pathetic and just do my own thing.

 

[MetaMuffin]

Maybe you're asexual? If you aren't aroused by a woman's curves or a man's body then I don't know what to tell you. It's just a natural burst of testosterone that occurs when you seem someone who tickles your fancy.

 

[LilithSlave]

Because they are more aesthetically pleasing.

But wait! Our shallow little society thinks that being fat makes you ugly and unappealing.

And yet what are breasts? Fat!

So might I ask you is more "aesthetically appealing" about the female?

 

[Nieroshai]

Your difficulty is in the fact that your attraction lies equally between the sexes, if not closer to the male side. If you were straight, you would have the answer to your question. If you were straight-up gay, you would know what's so attractive about men that so many other men don't see. It is as simple as this.

 

[MaxwellEdison]

Because biology said so?
Seriously, I showed the..ahem...signs, of being attracted to women before I knew what attraction to women meant. It's not something I consciously think about.

 

[EclipseoftheDarkSun]

Yeah, sexual preference is instinctual and thus not easily analyzable by the conscious mind. Therefore asking for a reasoned explanation of what's going through your mind when you look at someone you find attractive is pretty much pointless. Explaining kinks in sexuality might be more amenable to analysis as that seems to be more about mental association of the normal sex drive with particular events in a person's life.

 

[Anthony Wells]

well...not to sound like an ass or something...i find breasts on a woman attractive because they look nice and not out of place...like wise when i see a pregnant woman i still dont find them less attractive for it...now when a woman is fat...her legs are pudgy and her arms have flabs...it grosses me out because it looks far out of place...but i also find this true for males that are fat too (for the record i am heterosexual)the mammary glands are part of the woman to feed milk to a baby.. and maybe im wrong on that but i dont care...i find them attractive because they are supposed to be there...the fat on other areas of a woman and men...that is not natural so i do not find it attractive... i may be overweight but surprisingly it is almost all on my stomach but i find it unattractive and will attempt to lose it...i hope that helps... i personally find breasts attractive because they are a natural part of the body..just like a pregnant stomach is also natural so i know its not just fat on them for no reason.. its very hard to answer this question honestly without seeming like a dickwad or something..

 

[MaxwellEdison]

Honestly?

Boobs.

Dunno why. They're so jubbly, they make me feel bubbly.

Tim Minchin reference?

 

[lucidfox]

Who do you mean by people? Only men, or both men and women? It seems that your post implies the former. Speaking as a lesbian here (but not claiming to be representative of all lesbians, I'm very much not)...

Because some people seem to act as if women are somehow universally beautiful, aside from even sexual orientation or anything. And billions of dollars are spent on highlighting women's supposed "objective beauty". And it feels weird, I don't get it. What's so beautiful about females? I, for one, don't see any kind of objective beauty in the woman. Heck, I don't even see what people think is some "beautiful" or "pretty" about women.

Bull.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

But I seriously just feel dumbfounded. Feel free to make your own about men. But me, I don't get what's so attractive about women. What do women have that men don't? A vagina?

Bull.

Some women have penises. But I still would prefer those to men.

You can give a typical expected answer of "oh God this question is stupid. It's of course because evolutionary reproductive biology men are meant to be attracted to women and women are meant to be attracted to men blahblahblah" but that doesn't actually answer my question.

Bull.

If evolutionary instincts were dominant in our behavior, there would be no gays.

I don't care if you're not even physically attracted to us, and find women beautiful nonetheless, but I just want to know why the heck people seem to find women so beautiful. If anything, a lot of things about us seem kinda gross.

Statistics, please.

How many people (among the entire population) find women inherently beautiful?

I don't.

It's not so much that I find women pretty - there are all kinds, there are pretty women and ugly women, there are short women and tall women, there are slim women and chubby women, and so on and so forth.

But it's mostly about personality, I find most men repulsive both physically and personality-wise. I can't really explain why. I just do. Why do you like food X but not food Y?

 

[LilithSlave]

As for your "I don't understand why men are generally sexist around other men" it goes back to the way we are wired from the start.

No, we are sapient beings and sexism is not innate. We have no need for, and should have no desire for an "alpha male", or male supremacist society.

Not all animals have an alpha male/patriarchal/male supremacist structure. There are matriarchal animals. And it sounds silly to see men get into such fights, like flame wars on the internet over who has the better taste in women's bodies.

This is getting off topic since this topic doesn't have anything to do with sexism. But humans have culture, those other animals do not. And our motivations and culture are complicated, far too complicated to just say we're motivated/hardwired for male domination and competition.