They're soft, innocent flowers, wafting in a breeze of lightness and bunnies and fluffy clouds.
Men are brutal and blood-drenched and smash each other's faces in with large boulders.
It's called "opposites attract," and it's reason enough for anything. As for physical attributes, well, I can't say, but yeah it's all genetics. I myself think the entire human body is, objectively, horribly disgusting. And yet I'm still "turned on" by naked women and men. Why? Penises are just as horribly malformed and ugly as vaginas are.
bisexuality strikes me as selfish. what, 3.5 billion possible sexual partners isnt enough for you? its gotta be the full 7 billion? might as well be Agnostic too
It is rather pathetic to see how deterministic and reductionist most of the people in this thread are being; to simply round it all off to a biological process that we have little choice in and then condemn him for questioning it.
Although it is part of our genetics to have the capacity to reproduce, I don't believe it is the case where 100% of humans have the 'urge' to do so, the way I see it these days, it splits into those who simply accept the irrational desires for a woman's body and those who just want to have sex.
I believe though, that you and I are rather like minded in the subject, but perhaps due to the differences in our thought processes, I am heterosexual and most certainly not attracted to a man, although I am open to the concept of copulating with a woman, I simply feel no urge or desire to do so. As I reiterate, I have the capacity, but perhaps unlike the majority I do not have the urge, if anything, I consider it a freedom of will.
Do not feel ashamed or repressed for it OP, your mindset is different to a greater extent than the majority, the naysayers can keep prattling on like a herd of well trained sheep, embrace the freedom of your will of choice, I certainly consider it a good thing to be under less control from genetics, if anything it may be a sign of our leaving behind of animal instincts.
Regardless, the whole issue of attraction to the opposite sex is just a single facet of a gigantic diamond of life, no need to dwell on it, just enjoy your life; I've never even had intimate contact with a woman but I'm certainly not suffering for it.
By default, our brains associate the opposite gender with sexual activity, and thus makes you aroused when that possibility is presented. The same way that when you lift something heavy your muscles go to work, or when you're in pain, your brain releases endorphin. It's a programmed response that's there simply because the species that had it survived.
Beyond our initial programming, we begin to associate other things with sex and arousal. Our society tends to glorify breasts, and thus they tend to get worked into our sexual mindset. It's different for everyone, some people like asses, some people like muscle tone(Or lack-there-of), some people get hot over colors or clothes, or inanimate objects(Like roller coasters), but we're all ultimately attracted to the same abstract idea, we've just chosen different places to store it.
If I was going to take a stab in the dark, I'd have to say it's something about 'smoothness'.
The stereotypical attractive woman is smoother and often quite round in places. This woman will often have a smooth hourglass-shaped waist, with large, often perfectly rounded breasts, with a toned and curved bum, and even the front of the woman curves gently down from the stomach to the vagina.
Men, however, I see more like angles than smooth shapes - if we look at the stereotype attractive man. He'll have square pectorals, lines of definition across the stomach, arms, shoulders, all over the body in general. The penis itself is a 'line' as such, and isn't as round as, say, the breasts or behind of a woman. 'Square' jaws and strong jaw-lines in general are considered a kind of masculine attractive, as opposed to our stereo-type attractive woman having a gentler curves forming her chin.
I've no idea why such shapes appeal, but people seem to worship the shape of someone's [whatever] quite often when praising their attractiveness.
Alphonse_Lamperouge said:
bisexuality strikes me as selfish. what, 3.5 billion possible sexual partners isnt enough for you? its gotta be the full 7 billion? might as well be Agnostic too
I often wonder why not more products are coming out for men to make them more attractive (other than Ax hair care products) I never find clothes in my size, nor accessories. I wouldn't say I want to look pretty, as much as I just like to look hot.
As for the question itself I would say its a biological impulse. The same impulse that drives people to have sex (and know how to achieve sex). Though everyone is slightly different. I have very little attraction to boobs. Sure on a woman they should be there, but you wont see me trying to marry them. Quite a few guys I've talked to say the same thing. I think its a man trait. Something that defines a man. Then again I'm bi myself so I could be totally wrong.
But then again, I'm a little weird about who I'm attracted to. (Example: If you where to ask me which celebrity I find most attractive of either sex I'd say Sonny Moore AKA Skrillex)
It's a bit off topic and I hope this is okay but I just had to jut in for one post and say OH MY GOD ME TOO.
I don't know much about his personality, but a pair of eyes like that, to attempt to explain it, something about the shape or expression, I wish I knew the best way to describe them, somehow conveys to me a kind of approachability or sensitivity.
Actually, I think that's a part of why I'm bisexual, as well. I honestly care more about personality, but when it comes to the shallow stuff, it seems like what drags me in are a cute pair of eyes, not the body. A cute pair of eyes or a nice smile or facial expression or a good personality is something the exists within all genders. And I like faces better, particularly eyes, because I feel that they convey some kind of emotion or thought. I could stare at a pair of breasts all day and never get any of a person's thoughts or emotions out of it. Facial expressions can be deceiving sometimes maybe, but at least it seems to give the illusion that you can tell what someone is thinking if you can't. A sensation that causes attraction. An approachable look or a look that portrays some kind of nice personality trait or mood can be very attractive.
Or at least, I don't think men and women have much different eyes, do they?
I don't know how appropriate or even allowed it is to go into gross sexual detail. But maybe I should try just for proof of the fact I can do it. I hope you'll forgive how gross I'm being and it's all okay.
I'm a bisexual, but I'll have to admit that I'm more attracted to the male reproductive organs more than female. I can be attracted to women, but there are limits. I can't imagine how any man wants to put their face anywhere near the inside of a woman's extra hole, that bleeds constantly and on a regular basis. Furthermore, I don't understand the fixation many men have with shaving genitals. I hear little of people saying men should shave their genitals. And that's ironic, because I would think, the more that shields you from the inside of a person's vagina the better. You know, a nice veil of pubic hair to veil that weird looking hole. You know, that pees and bleeds and often looks like it has veins and strands of weird pink and purple. At least the penis looks like the color of a person's skin generally. The vagina looks like a hole in the body. Like, literally, the inside of everyone's body is usually pretty awful and creepy looking. Most people don't like watching videos of people's intestines, but what makes a woman's reproductive organs much different looking? I would think that someone who liked vaginas would want to be a dentist or something, because it seems like it would be an awful lot like getting up close and personal with people's throats and stuff. The penis actually looks like skin and stuff, so I can understand being attracted to it. But the vagina looks like a coral reef.
Which I can understand men not minding if they're just putting their penis in a hole and they don't have to think about what it looks like. But you know, it's just another hole, there are plenty where that came from on both men and women. And a mark of being a heterosexual men or lesbian woman or whatever, seems to be liking to get your face right up in that thing, no pubic hair or anything. To me that seems like wanting to put your tongue in a creepy dungeon full of snakes and bats and horrible gross monsters. Why do you want to go in that thing? Especially not without a torch and proper equipment.
God, that was a gross amount of sexual detail. You can hardly avoid such explanations in a topic like this, though.
So, being a guy, I basically have the choice of putting my dick in an vagina or an arse. Personally, I'd rather not put it in the sewage works.
But this is not how I think, why would I even consider periods, and what it looks like on the inside? Anyone I would date would keep it clean, so periods are a non-issue.
As for what it looks like? This does not matter, I don't think about a vagina when I'm thinking about sex, I think about the ecstasy on my partner's face, being close to them, pressing myself into them. The way to achieve this is via the vulva; what it looks like is immaterial.
I'm the opposite to you too in that way, I think penises are pretty bad-looking, they're an engorged organ with some hairy, elastic-skinned sack attached to it, and without being a girl, there is no attraction to such a thing for me. A vulva is something that I can go further than being pressed close to, I can be pressed into it. It's the closest I can get to my partner.
Getting away from sex, emotionally I am not attracted to guys. I have never met a guy I would like to date. Where is the appeal in there at all? It's foreign, and I don't understand it. And because of these things I can relate to people who attracted to them. I have the same issue of understanding you do, just reversed.
=> In most cases women are the first source of comfort and nourishment for most humans. They feed you, hold you, comfort you. So most of your initial associations are going to be with women. So the "softness", the breasts and the smell of women hold emotional associations of love/comfort/home if you got it or an obsession/craving if you didn't get it. Or something different/nothing if your reactions are just wired differently from what they are for most other humans.
This is ingrained in babies. A baby will stare at breasts even of non-lactating women and try to "dock on". Especially in the wild it makes sense for a baby to cling on to the mother and identify her even over the father. And in this stage it makes total sense for there to be a distinction between breasts and the penis since nourishment trumps everything in usefulness in this stage of life.
Similarly, we are biologically wired to find childlike faces cute. Why? so we will feel protective of babies and not kill them hence ensuring the survival of our species. There have been studies of this, the emotional reactions we have to baby like features for example in baby animals or toys.
Women not having beards or softer/less angular features might put them closer to this hardwired protectiveness and affection schemata.
I often wonder why not more products are coming out for men to make them more attractive (other than Ax hair care products) I never find clothes in my size, nor accessories. I wouldn't say I want to look pretty, as much as I just like to look hot.
As for the question itself I would say its a biological impulse. The same impulse that drives people to have sex (and know how to achieve sex). Though everyone is slightly different. I have very little attraction to boobs. Sure on a woman they should be there, but you wont see me trying to marry them. Quite a few guys I've talked to say the same thing. I think its a man trait. Something that defines a man. Then again I'm bi myself so I could be totally wrong.
i sometimes wonder if i should tape them down or something jeez...
on a personal note beauty is beauty. i happen to appreciate all parts of both sexes, boobs included unlike my husband. i see no shame in my attraction to the different delights of the flesh and i am a woman with my own boobs so the its a male thing does not apply
Well, I've tried to figure out what's so nice about, say, boobs and the like.
But every time I do, I can't seem to see what's more to them other than just being another piece of fat on the body.
And most perplexing about this, is that people who often say boobs make women beautiful and the like, also say things like "fat women are ugly". I could understand if the logic behind liking boobs was, "I like soft bodies", but the same people don't seem to like fat anywhere else.
It escapes me. Fat on the chest? Ok. Fat on the tummy? Not ok. Huh? What's the difference?
That "Fat on the chest" as you so eloquently put it is very often related to fertility and sexuality in many cultures, both modern and ancient, and I believe there are some (possibly extinct) cultures who worship(ed) fat women for the very same reason, because their culture related big women to being heavily fertile, and thus a boon to prolonging their culture.
In other words, it's not just genetics that tell us what is good and what is bad, but culture as well. Call it what you will - Society, Propoganda, Brain-Washing - but we are led to believe in what is considered aesthetically beautiful primarily by what others believe in. At least, that's what we lead others into believing on the surface. That's why fetishes even exist. While many may have a broad idea of what they consider beautiful, every person in the world has anywhere from one to one hundred additional steps that they personally would take in their pursuit of their personal ideal of "perfection" in a mate. Some of these steps may be arbitrary, some difficult to accomplish, others impossible with our current technology. But perhaps I've veered off-topic.
Women are considered beautiful while Men are not, IMHO, because women are typically told at a young age that they must be beautiful. Again, this can be traced back to any of the hundreds of cultures before women's rights, but in those cultures women were typically seen as little more than prizes to be won by successful men. As such, many were raised to be just that, beautiful to look at, but otherwise useless. While MUCH has changed since then, a bit of that mentality has never left us. I don't think it ever will. As long as we remain the sexual creatures we are, I believe women will always be portrayed as universally beautiful, with all the quirks that come with that.
What I find attractive in women? What they express with their appearances, what do I feel when I look at said person. Sexual tension, cheerfulness and assorted. That attracts me to someone, does that answer your question?
Also keep it up with these threads they offer some actual discussion value for a change.
Ok first you made that thread about that retro Skyrim cover you made a big deal of and now this?
OT- First thing sorry to be blunt, you haven't got laid yet if you think a vagina is nothing special. Yes I'm a virgin but I don't view the unknown things I've yet to experience as overrated.
Second thing I think it really is about instinct. I mean come on! Animals look for mates all the time to reproduces. Before you say it's a emotionless program to do so it's not always the case as some animal species do care and feel affection for one another (penguin, whales, dophin, some lizard and more), something which most of us humans can relate to. In another word maybe a sense of happyiness.
As a bisexual myself, I see exactly what you mean, OP. I find persons attractive, not whatever gender they're attached to. Of course, some traits are more appealing than others, but I can't for the life of me see why some are and some aren't. It just sort of is like it is.
You know, I've been attracted to women ever since before I knew what that attraction even meant (like most heterosexual males, I presume), and there was no thought process to this at all. I once questioned my attraction at a point in time, and for about a week of wondering, I couldn't for the life of me figure an answer. It's not like my parents forced the idea on me. Hell, they didn't even mention the concept to me until way after I knew I liked women. It was 100% me and my instincts (or tastes, if you don't want to put a biological spin on it).
You keep fishing for a better explanation on the matter, but you can't really get one for this. Sexual orientation and attraction is completely subjective (because we're sapiens, as you put it. We have the mental capacity to seek what we want individually and not as a species) and many other posters have tried telling you this before me.
You don't understand why some people are attracted to women? I don't understand why some people are attracted to men. That doesn't mean that their attraction is somehow strange or unjustified. It just isn't mine, and therefore I can't truly understand how they feel, and it's the same the other way around. That's it.
There can be no satisfactory answer to your question. Sexuality is incredibly deep and a huge grey area (as much as people like to pretend it isnt), we just feel something and appreciate something in women that you don't. Your sexuality is different. Unique in its own way (since you still describe yourself as bisexual i'm definitely going with unique like I said, shades of grey.)
It's impossible to relay why we find a gender attractive. It would be like trying to explain a foot fetish to someone who finds feet disgusting. It's impossible, neither individuals are going to walk away understanding each other's attraction of that particular thing any better than before the conversation began.
It's all about feelings, feelings that are innate and unchangable. This means it can't really be rationalized and put into words for everyone to understand.
Actually, while it is rare, it is possible for a male to lactate.
Secondly, something seems wrong about a man being attracted to lactation. It has to do with feeding babies. Not adult men, babies. And being attracted to lactation seems like a twist to one's sexuality. Because the first thing that should come to someone's mind if they think of lactation should be children. Not "that turns me on".
hulksmashley said:
Man boobs don't have the same shape. They are triangular, while lady boobs are round, and the mammary tissue makes them bouncy.
Eh, a lot of that roundness comes from bra shaping, not mammary glands. Breasts would have the tendency to hang and go to sides and generally have a more "triangular" shape weren't it for the prevalence of bras.
They in fact, have a surprisingly similar shape in general. There are all sorts of boobs, but I don't think women's boobs are naturally as round as we tend to think them. We're just used to them being that way because we all start wearing bras as soon as we have anything. Even if ours are too small to need bras. It's kind of ridiculous, actually. This need to have a bra like a rite of passage or to feel more adult or teenage or some odd reason.
Oh yeah, and the fact that many men pressure us to feel bigger is probably an influence on that.
hulksmashley said:
What I REALLY don't understand is why people find women and men with their bones jutting up under the skin, with visible ribs and spine, attractive. That is the most physically unattractive thing I can think of.
A smaller equal exists amongst men. There was boys in my class who started shaving at age 12 when they started noticing a single hair on their chin and they would brag about it. And use deo when they barely made a sweat. I mean, because thats what their father did. The girls mother probably wears a bra. A lot of it comes from Social Inheritance. Dont speak of the bra as it is something unique. Everyone wants to be like their parents at a certain age. Looks up to them. They show this in different ways, why do boys want to become firefighters and policemen at an early age, they look up to them. Why do girls want to become mothers, nurses. When they are young? They also look up to those figures. Its heroes, forefigures. Like ehm, girls look up to certain actors and pop stars. And boys look up to sports-stars and soldiers. Social inheritance.
I guess a razor doesnt shape the chin, or well. It can but. What a horrible image that is.
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