I finally found a use for the Twilight fan girls!

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Beowulf DW

Beowulf DW

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Outside the Williard building here at Penn State, you can usually find an old man called the Williard Preacher preaching about various things and how they're somehow related to God. The Atheist and Agnostic organization often has people there participating in heated debates with the old fart. I chose to observe and take part in the discussion, and at the end, another Christian and I took part in some friendly banter with the atheists (They had a great sense of humor).

Before I left, I mentioned that I had once seen Jesus described as a zombie with magical powers. The lead atheist chimed in that Jesus was really more like a vampire than a zombie, as far as undead beings go.

This is what our conversation became:

Other Christian: "Well, Jesus is more like a reverse-vampire, since we're supposed to be drinking his blood."

Atheist: "Well, in some iterations, you must drink the blood a vampire to become a vampire."

Me: "So...we're vampires then?"

Then I realised that if I could get the Twilight fan-girls to believe that, I could get every young, emo Christian man laid!

And there you have it.

I have found a use for the Twilight fan-girls.

Any thoughts? Like...is this moral?
 
lwm3398

lwm3398

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Funny, yes. Believable, no. Plus, emos don't sparkle. The fan girls wouldn't believe you.
 
Legion

Legion

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Oct 2, 2008
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I don't see where Emo's come into it...

I also find it amusing that I have never met a Twilight fanboy/girl in real life and yet can't avoid the Twilight haters on the internet, it's somewhat ironic.
 
HardRockSamurai

HardRockSamurai

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Sure it might work, but it brings one question to mind. Would you really want to f**k a Twilight fan-girl?

Yes!

Hell yes!
 
Erana

Erana

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lwm3398 said:
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Funny, yes. Believable, no. Plus, emos don't sparkle. The fan girls wouldn't believe you.
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Sometimes they do.

But you can't forget that twilight fangirls made it OK to be pale again, too.
 
reiem531

reiem531

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Aug 26, 2009
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Hmmm... that is a decent plan, but that still leaves the problem of the Twilight fan-girls still being around. I think we should use them to colonize Mercury!
 
lwm3398

lwm3398

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DeadlyYellow said:
I thought ingesting the blood of a vampire caused you to become a thrall.
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Um. I don't know. I think you have to be a virgin of the opposite gender of the vampire, have them bite you, then have them bite their tongue, then force that blood into the bite.
 
Jedoro

Jedoro

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Frankly, I thought this would be a "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD" thread, but I doubt he would want their blood.

And while Christians are, you know, not allowed premarital sex, it would still be fun to just mess around with the Twilight fangirls.
 
D

Deity1986

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Suddenly I feel very religious :p

lwm3398 said:
...emos don't sparkle. The fan girls wouldn't believe you.
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Um, glitter? Come on, use some initiative.
Or you could approach them at night, but this may have some adverse effects.
 
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