I have a question more geared towards the males on this forum but everyone is free to respond

[Flishiz]

I was a typical mostly shut-in gamer in my early years, so I didn't spend time with other people as much as the rest of the playground did, so that might be why I don't have an absolutely clear understanding of how I look to the world. My girlfriend thinks I'm the most attractive guy in the world, but I don't particularly look in the mirror and jack off to myself.

 

[VaioStreams]

good question. I don't find myself attractive really. I mean I have my days when I feel attractive. I normally relate this to the fact I'm single and for some reason when some female does act interested in me she kinda looks like a troll. I mean Fatty. "WTF happened to your face?" I'm not saying I want a super model because I don't find most of them attractive. but I'd like someone I'm attracted too. I'm also not into guys. that's a good reason i don't find myself attractive lol. I could go on about my theory of this. but I digress.

 

[konkwastaken]

because a good portion of guys are too thick to realize it when a women starts to act interested in them. then when they don't see any chicks making a move (even if they are making a move) they assume there is something wrong with them, and yes i speak from personal expirience.

^ that

 

[Daye.04]

Seeing as how everyone who mentiones that they know they are somewhat attractive looks like superficial persons, I shall not comment on my appereance ... Wait .. Damnit!

This might be why I don't take upon womens signs. Because obviously I take too much as a sign. To back up this statement I'll admit that it has seemed that the Opening Poster has comed on to two people in this thread. I know she has a boyfriend, and that she probably didn't. Wich just comes to show that I are obviously not able to read signs.

Therefore I shall reject everyone =D

I was a typical mostly shut-in gamer in my early years, so I didn't spend time with other people as much as the rest of the playground did, so that might be why I don't have an absolutely clear understanding of how I look to the world. My girlfriend thinks I'm the most attractive guy in the world, but I don't particularly look in the mirror and jack off to myself.

That, sir. Just means you're normal. I sincerely hope no one does that. But then again. You'll allways have everything you want when jacking off =D

 

[Fraeir]

I was mocked continuously for over ten years, and furthermore I was avoided, ignored or equally mocked by the opposite sex.. Obviously I got a huge blow to my self-esteem thanks to that. Also, to make up any confusion, I was quite a gamer, and also I am a guy.

It wasn't until a little over a year ago I got to know a great group of people online, whom of which are mostly girls, and I've heard from more than a few of them that I look rather good. One of them commented my facial shape being ace and being naturally good looking. A couple of others have both commented that I look similar to a actor most of you would have heard of, and that was even when they didn't know that the other had said it XD;

I feel a lot better about my looks now than back then, which doesn't really hurt me. :3

 

[Grimrider6]

I think my answer is the same as everybody else's. Mocked in High School, became a reclusive shut-in. Lack of social skills, lack of self-esteem, multiple rejection and humiliation, which eventually led to depression, cynicism, and then nihilism.

At this stage in my life, I've gotten too used to being bitter and cynical to let it go. I actually feel resentment towards anyone or anything that tries to take it away from me. So if any girl tries to tell me that I'm good looking, or even tries to send me these mythical "signals" I hear so much about, I will actively resist them out of combined denial and self-hatred.

Looking back, I can remember at least three different occasions when a girl gave me extremely unsubtle signs of attraction (including one girl who leans over and gave me a spontaneous kiss out of nowhere, including tongue). I flat out refused to acknowledge that there was anything to it. Cognitive Dissonance FTW!

...and man, that felt good to vent. Back to crouching in front of my computer, eating cup ramen, and watching anime pr0n. ^^ Glee!

 

[kazork]

I really don't give a shit what people think about me so I used to (I have a girlfriend now) walk up to girls and either just kissed them or said that i thought they were attractive (it's a tactic that works because girls like man that are confident and in control at least my gf says this). I think I got rejected more then an hundred times in my life but I just thought it was there loss not mine because i actualy don't think most girls have anything intresting to say.

Now that i have a girlfriend she is the only girl I have to talk to and I really enjoy that. No more stupid talks about either fashion, gossip or celebs.

 

[Valiance]

Guys need clear hints.
Well not hints. More like actions. You could be as subtle as a sledgehammer to the face and your guy may barely pick it up.
Even when we pick it up, we're still afraid to do anything, because if we're wrong, it'll almost definitely end badly.
Also, as one guy said above me, we get a little beaten down by the jocks, and therefore tend to think a little less of ourselves.
You can't really do anything about this sort of thing... But hey, at least these types of guys are humble!

Bold, bold, bold, bold.

Also because, well, I'm not very attractive, any way around it.
I'm quite convinced that my girlfriends just lie to me and people say "I like your haircut" as a "oh, you got a haircut!" observation (since for some reason that's conversation that people bring up now and then, talking about fucking haircuts).

I have plenty of acne problems, and I'm not athletic at all, really, so it's difficult to be impressed with myself. Thing is, a lot of women hate the stereotypical mass-muscled thing, and prefer a twig like me, and my hair looks pretty damn good, and my face is shaped fine, it's just a slight acne problem as opposed to having no acne problem and just a fucking terrible looking face.

Long story short, for me, I guess I feel that you must have low standards or perhaps have found some very stupid people.

Or maybe they do it the same reason you do, whatever that is.

("and for the record i can show you a woman like that....it'd be me but really i'm not that interesting. i find myself boring to myself half the time. i don't get why others find me interesting....")

You clearly are; your thread alone has sparked 2 pages of discussion - have more, you know, confidence, or whatever that thing is called.

Some people have real confidence issues, some people are just realistic, and some people do it to manipulate people. That's about it.

 

[Altorin]

why do some guys (i find this more with gamers, nerds, and mormons for some odd reason) not find themselves attractive when clearly they are.......

and have women fight over them?

to clarify, i'm not trying to single anyone out and by guys i mean males in general i just want a little bit of insight into the male psyche.......

uhhh.... we dont live in manga?

 

[Lord George]

I'm an egocentric and I just love myself, I just look looking in the mirror every morning and thinking how good I look. I don't know why people have just low self esteem, I blame the media in general for having exaggerated the "perfect man" image, most people should just look at the people around them in ordinary life and they'll realise they look better then quite a lot of people. Works for me.

 

[thomasronan]

Most guys are one of two things:

1) Rather insecure, this goes without saying for geeks/nerds as we are typically socially retarded.
2) Have literally no clue what women think

I have recently set up the starwars sociaty in my University and love scifi in general, but on the otherhand was voted the "Mr" for my university too. From what I gather I must be good looking but never realised and had to be told. Such is the life of the geek I guess.

 

[Grimrider6]

I honestly think a standardized legal process should be instituted. Anybody who wishes to ask another person out on a date submits a Potential Romantic Engagement Form, complete with name, vital stats, and contact details. A response before the printed deadline indicates there are potential sparks!

After your first date, take a few minutes to look over your Post-Engagement Feedback Sheet, and see where you were Mr. Right and where you were Mr. Wrong. No fuss! No muss! No ambiguities or misread signs!

 

[Meta Like That]

I honestly think a standardized legal process should be instituted. Anybody who wishes to ask another person out on a date submits a Potential Romantic Engagement Form, complete with name, vital stats, and contact details. A response before the printed deadline indicates there are potential sparks!

They've already implemented this. It's called eHarmony.

 

[Et3rnalLegend64]

I don't think that I'm that attractive (despite a few girls telling me otherwise).

You're not alone on that one. A couple of my friends keep saying I am, my cousin's friend said I was apparently, and I once had a couple (possibly middle school) girls come up to me once in the supermarket and ask if they could take a picture of me (WTF?). They gave me their number afterwards. For the most part, I really don't care about my appearance, but I lean on the I'm-not-all-that-good-looking side despite what I'm told. I really don't see how they think I'm attractive. This probably has less to do with being a gamer than a possible inferiority complex from my parents constantly telling me how amazing this or that person is for being successful/strong/hard working/etc and that I should be more like whoever they're talking about at the time. I wish one of my friends would stop addressing me as "love" sometimes. It made me a little paranoid when she started doing it. Whether she always does that, or if it means anything is beyond me. Girls are too subtle (and I'm the guy who values subtlety over being a loud mouth too)

 

[NeutralDrow]

I'm...not bad-looking, at least, but I'm hardly the picture of Adonisian masculinity.

My answer has been stated throughout this thread, though. Part of it is my inherent obliviousness and introversion, part is my absolute terror of screwing things up, a fear built over a number of experiences (rejected publicly, one girl thought I was stalking her, I was a little too makeout obsessed with another, etc.). Granted, experiences like these are a part of growing as a human being, but they've had the unintended effect of making me somewhat paranoid.

So far, the best relationship I've had evolved out of two and a half years of friendship...when she came out and said it. It evolved back into friendship later, so if anything, I have even harder to work now...

 

[gunluva]

why do some guys (i find this more with gamers, nerds, and mormons for some odd reason) not find themselves attractive when clearly they are.......

If you see a picture of me, you'll most likely agree that I am an ugly fool.