I have a question more geared towards the males on this forum but everyone is free to respond

[NubletInc]

Hey I like a good honest opinion I'm 15, 6'5, A bit on the scrawny side but I'm in good shape i work-ED in a video game store now helping my dad in carpentry, like anime and manga more than anything except maybe video games, and hanging with my nerdy friends. And i say you know what if a relationship happens cool, but I am happy with me doing what i do ill worry about all that relationship stuff later when i feel I'm ready for it. Recently a friends sister stopped by for no other reason then to say hi (yes she without a doubt likes me) and my dad was there and he got pissed about me saying I'm not gonna do anything about it but you know what I don't know what id do with a relationship my idea of relationships have been warped by movies and the like and i don't think i can have a real relationship I don't want to pretend to be someone else to meet a girl I want to be me and that's hard for me to do around girls, especially if I'm with friends, I'm sure a lot of people see a teenage guy completely change when with his other teenage guy friends and I'm the same so when i meet a girl who i can be natural with without worrying too much I'll be happy just to be with her, in a relationship or not. Sorry I might have gone off topic but hey thanks for giving me the opportunity to write all this. Yeah i might fit into one of those categories u mentioned but hey I'm me and I like it that way.

 

[Avatar Roku]

Thing is, for me, if a girls likes me and is subtle, I won't pick up on it. If they're not subtle about it, I assume they're messing with me (actually happened to me, luckily I didn't fall for it).

 

[NubletInc]

Wow, this thread is pretty deep and as much as i like to read others opinions I dont think i can go thru 4 pages i got to 2 and had to comment again, you kno wat If theres a girl who lives in richmond British Columbia who wants to Play an fps on xbox live or WH40k DOW II, Add my gamertag its my name, (excuse me for using this forum as a dating service but I wanna thro myself out there cuz im bored as hell.) Like I said Im White 6'5 15 years old love old cars 67 camaro is my all time favorite and I like fps games some rpgs some rts's I like emotional stuff I dyed my hair pink cuz i was bored with my normal hair, I'll cry if I watch a sad movie, Hell honestly I nearly cried wathing twilight wen Edward said they couldnt b together and i wasa watcing it with my dad, I love anime and manga I'd say I'm not ugly but not "hot" If you feel like saying hi Message me and ill reply, I have nothing better to do. And I'd like to meet some new people. Like I said im bored as hell on a daily basis and wouldnt mind meeting new people so If you feel like saying hi feel free to message me. (ya i realize how pathetic I must be posting this on a forum but hey this forum fits so why not?)

 

[JokerGrin]

I'm the opposite...I wish that girls would now leave me alone because I've found my perfect girl. Quite hard to avoid on a saturday night out drinking but I get fed up of making excuses to get rid of girls who don't think that "I'm engaged" is a good enough reason to leave you the hell alone.

 

[Mask of 1000 Faces]

I'm the opposite...I wish that girls would now leave me alone because I've found my perfect girl. Quite hard to avoid on a saturday night out drinking but I get fed up of making excuses to get rid of girls who don't think that "I'm engaged" is a good enough reason to leave you the hell alone.

Nothing would impress me more if my girlfriend would do that.

Consider yourself about ready to enjoy another "You're Awesome" sticker stuck to your fridge.

 

[McNinja]

There was a girls I liked over the summer and she liked me, and i knew it, but i was afraid of really doing anything about it. However, She ended up screwing me over in quite the spectacular fashion, and not even for another guy. As it turns out, she was waitng for me to make my move, but my low self esteem kept me from doing anything.

Tip: Ladies, if your guy or a guy you like doesn't seem ot get it, MAKE THEM GET IT. Subtlety is not the name of the game and will often not be seen or noticed.

The only time I've ever gotten a clear sign was when a girls looked at me giggled, whispered to her friend then ten minutes later when i was leaving work, walked up to me and started flirting with me. Be painfully obvious. Do it.

 

[Mask of 1000 Faces]

Also, I hate, HATE, HATE people touching me. Anything more than a 5 second hand shake, High five, or fist tap and I flip.

Pray to got you never meet me, I hug everybody.

 

[Snowalker]

Well, to be quiet frank, were intelligent people and when it comes to women, we think logically. Women, when it comes to dating, have codes and rules which can often defy logic, so we are oblivious to your attempts to impress us, or whatever you call it. So then we assume that the girls aren't clearly tring, we must be clearly wrong in their eyes. Of course, I could be way off, and not know what the hell I'm saying, but this is what I believe is going on.

 

[JamminOz07]

i think pretty much everybody has at least one insecurity about themselves, even if they don't show it...

 

[ZippyDSMlee]

why do some guys (i find this more with gamers, nerds, and mormons for some odd reason) not find themselves attractive when clearly they are.......

and have women fight over them?

to clarify, i'm not trying to single anyone out and by guys i mean males in general i just want a little bit of insight into the male psyche.......

People are not great at communicating and sharing feelings, they are to afraid of being blunt and up front with themselves and other that it will cost them something. People need to realize everything comes at a cost you either worry over something and gain stress from it or be blunt and deal with the after math.

Of course this is coming from an introverted geek who can't stand people....

 

[Labyrinth]

True, the media has ruined many a relationships. And I do wonder how many men and women would just let someone come up to them and snog them. The shock might hold them still for a few moments...

Yes indeed. It's wonderfully effective.

 

[bad rider]

Because we aren't? Besides I have a fat friends who chases women. It dosen't look pretty so every time I think about it, a voice in my head just starts screaming.

 

[Seldon2639]

why do some guys (i find this more with gamers, nerds, and mormons for some odd reason) not find themselves attractive when clearly they are.......

and have women fight over them?

to clarify, i'm not trying to single anyone out and by guys i mean males in general i just want a little bit of insight into the male psyche.......

At the core of it, it seems like it's a learned behavior. We're told for most of our young lives that we are not the guys that the girls want to be with. The cause of that has been debated ad naseum on this and other sites, so I won't delve into that. We're told by the girls we like, and the girls that society at large find acceptable, that we're like some combination of Frankenstein's monster and a leper.

This causes in us two reactions. The first is to insulate ourselves from those reactions. We avoid putting ourselves into situations where the girl can say "no, no no no, no no no no... No". More germane to your question is the second:

We assume that any girl who likes us must be somehow unacceptable. After being told that none of the "good" girls like us, our reaction when a girl does like us is that she must be screwed up somehow; deformed or deranged. It's not true, but it is the impression. Logic screws us up. I've heard this very reaction from my best friend when we were in high school. Despite girls wanting him, he honestly couldn't reconcile it. Early unpopularity makes it difficult to assimilate to being liked. Especially since it can also engender paranoia in the male, that the girl is only pretending to like us for some usurious end. Or that we're misinterpreting.

Those among us who discover that there are things we can offer to society, ourselves, and friends and lovers, become fine. It just takes time, maturity, and a leap of faith to say "wow, this girl might actually like me and not be really messed up."

 

[Ignignoct]

why do some guys (i find this more with gamers, nerds, and mormons for some odd reason) not find themselves attractive when clearly they are.......

and have women fight over them?

to clarify, i'm not trying to single anyone out and by guys i mean males in general i just want a little bit of insight into the male psyche.......

I think society's stigma attached to nerdiness (admittedly fading away quickly) has caused a Nerdian rebellion on the values of said society.

Appearance of wealth, physical attractiveness, and peak fitness? A Jedi craves not these things. At least, he does not to depend on them.

Some Nerds only value the actions and intelligence of themselves and others, and to base worth or self-respect on attractiveness is an affront to this.

Edit: Full disclosure here... My last two serious GF's turned clingy-GuiltTrip-suicidal soon after the sex started happening. My subconscious mind now associates sex as play-now, pay-later effect. I don't chase tail or want/need to be attractive right now.

Here's me with a chainsaw helping clean up the yard. [http://c4.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/103/l_54c69803baf91264c3a8ddddc8f82a47.jpg]

And with a shovel [http://c1.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/65/l_a51f0e251b4f4411a3387b1b87c7d5b4.jpg]

 

[newguy77]

Personally, I don't care because I have no idea if I'm good looking to anyone.

 

[Pumpkin_Eater]

The individual is of more interest than the whole here, but I'll speculate a bit. He could have had some rough rejections in the past; even if he's more attractive now a string of disappointments can stick with you. Could be generalized low self-esteem. Could be the stereotype that gamers and nerds can't get girls. The girls in question could have really strange taste. He could be an oblivious idiot. There's also that 1 in a million chance he knows exactly how hot he is and likes the idea of girls fighting over him.

 

[John Stalvern]

Then, when he saw a cheerleader with a Star Trek book, he simply said it was a good one and he like the the author's others, too. a month later, she approched our table at lunch with her chemistry book (to cover her real question, all the popular people were watching) and asked him the author's other books were. He ended up marrying her and they got to Star Trek Conventions regularly.

Wow. That kind of blows my mind.

 

[Booze Zombie]

I don't think I'm attractive, but apparently I get stared at by ladies a lot... but I'm too busy not looking.
My father thinks that is probably why they're staring at me, because I'm not interested, and that's a turn-on.

Life is odd.

 

[JBarracudaL]

Because insecurity is fairly common in people these days, especially those who are primarily socially withdrawn.

 

[Altorin]

-Snip-

Hey baby, can I interest you in some Adam West penis?