I just had a Dream in the Shower (explicit)

[Sebenko]

Spoiler

Ugly Shepard thinks your topic is highly inappropriate.

 

[Kanlic]

Spoiler

Ugly Shepard thinks your topic is highly inappropriate.

What I'd give to see the love triangle between his fugly ass and the female crew in action

 

[Digital_Hero]

Quite possibly the funniest thing i've seen all night.

dont jerk off after a bad day, stress makes it harder to get it up and its just not enjoyable.

just go to bed early, and wake up feeling better.

 

[Timmehexas]

Play as the Terrans next time?

 

[Stollos]

Spoiler: there is only one responce: and it is MCGIYGAS

Oh dude. I'm actually not gonna get any sleep anytime soon because of those. Entirely appropriate, and entirely disturbing. Fuck I hate clowns.

D:

 

[Snor]

wahahaha wtf XD i so did not want to know that....

 

[WolfThomas]

As I said in another thread, it could be worse, today I saw a guy in his early 30's with only a roughly 50% chance of living through the next year, who had a past history of self abuse, homelessness and sexual abuse as a child.

Not trying to one up you, just whoa it was an intense morning.

Also dreams are weird go figure.

 

[Kanlic]

Quite possibly the funniest thing i've seen all night.

dont jerk off after a bad day, stress makes it harder to get it up and its just not enjoyable.

just go to bed early, and wake up feeling better.

65 posts in and only the second piece of legitimate advice I got so far. Your right, this probably explains why its harder to get it up when finally getting to that point to sex up your friend, it can be very stressful given your history with the person.

As I said in another thread, it could be worse, today I saw a guy in his early 30's with only a roughly 50% chance of living through the next year, who had a past history of self abuse, homelessness and sexual abuse as a child.

Not trying to one up you, just whoa it was an intense morning.

Also dreams are weird go figure.

Two things, it wasn't the kind of dream where you sleep. It was this kind of pseudo-dream where I am conscience of what is going on, you know, because I am actively killing fairies with my dirty deed and showering.

As far as your "one-upmanship," no offense taken. I am just kind of curious to figure out how you knew that. Do you work in a clinic or something?

 

[lambsheep]

This was my face at first but then I laughed very, very hard that you posted thisXD

 

[Steel Ronin]

A little bit of back story, today was just a crap day for me. Two brand new pairs of headphones broke on me, I didn't finish any assignments or complete any notes in my classes, went to play StarCraft 2 to blow off some steam, and when I did get to play, I lost nearly every game. To make matters worse, this girl I was dating shut me down when I ran into her today, not going to get into the details how, but she cut me off at some point saying, "Don't you have a class to go to?"

Fast forward to my late night shower. Living in a dorm, getting my wank on is much harder because privacy is almost non-existent, so I get my business done in the shower. As you could imagine, I really was looking forward to this one because of my bad day, but I couldn't get it up. Another notch on the shittiness of my day, but I continued. At a certain point I closed my eyes and got it going, letting my imagination take control.

I was with the girl that snapped at me today, and we were going at it on my bed. During the process a sudden flash of me playing StarCraft popped up, where three Thors were desperately trying to stop a massive wave of zerglings from breaching the supply depots I had blocking my base entrance. My mind then started jumping back and forth between the defense struggle of my imaginary StarCraft game and my sexual interaction with the girl, with the words "Stop the rush" indicating the switch between the two scenes.

Then the zerglings broke through my supply depots, signaling that I finished too early in the dream and in the shower. I was still in the dream state, my last memory was looking down at a disappointed Mexican Vegan, whose only response to the embarrassment was, "[pause] Don't you have a class to go to?"

So Escapies, any thoughts on my disappointed wank experience?

... ... WHAT...THE... ... FUCK
I don't know what kinda drug you were on while writing this (or when jerking off) but...seriously dude...isn't this a little "too much information"
My thoughts on this ?...Get a girlfriend!!!

 

[DeathWyrmNexus]

I am disappointed that you decided this needed to be shared...

 

[Hellz_Barz]

HAHAHA
I know those days and those showers too.
I recommend running till you drop to your knees from pure exhaustion. You'll forget about your little self-comforting...till you hit the shower that is, but by then your either to tired to get distracted or care at all.

This is true. Also if your exhausted before hand you last longer.

 

[vaderaider]

Ummmmmm...yeah.

 

[Digital_Hero]

Quite possibly the funniest thing i've seen all night.

dont jerk off after a bad day, stress makes it harder to get it up and its just not enjoyable.

just go to bed early, and wake up feeling better.

65 posts in and only the second piece of legitimate advice I got so far. Your right, this probably explains why its harder to get it up when finally getting to that point to sex up your friend, it can be very stressful given your history with the person.

Yeah man. ever notice how things stack up and you just get angrier and angrier? Well Bad day = no boner = makes day worse = makes you more mad in this case. its all one big vicious cycle till you either calm down, or just go to bed.

btw, congrats on the kooky hallucination. in the shower no less

 

[Lyri]

OP.

I think I love you.

A++

 

[The Cheezy One]

im surprised this hasnt been locked, but whatever...
beating off is like procrastination - it feels good at the time, but all youre doing is fcuking yourself
lower self esteem afterwardss will not help

 

[Kanlic]

... ... WHAT...THE... ... FUCK
I don't know what kinda drug you were on while writing this (or when jerking off) but...seriously dude...isn't this a little "too much information"
My thoughts on this ?...Get a girlfriend!!!

I am disappointed that you decided this needed to be shared...

I find it interesting that the two of you posted pretty much the same message at the same time, so I will address you both likewise.

As an athlete at my university, I cannot take any drugs or what have you because of random drug tests. My days are filled with mundane routines of studying, eating, exercising, shooting the shit with people here and there, but vary rarely does something truly interesting happen. When that does occur, I am compelled to share it.

In this case I was deeply affected by what happened. I didn't know what to think about it, and didn't want to talk about it with anyone around me because their reaction would be very similar to all the "WTF's" I have been getting. At least with the anonymity of the internet and the general maturity of this websites users, I thought I might as well share my thoughts here.

Oh and by the way, its not a girlfriend thing, its the fact that I like to masturbate.

Yeah man. ever notice how things stack up and you just get angrier and angrier? Well Bad day = no boner = makes day worse = makes you more mad in this case. its all one big vicious cycle till you either calm down, or just go to bed.

btw, congrats on the kooky hallucination. in the shower no less

Yea, someone should have told that to the Columbine kids, but then we are getting into the disenfranchisement of today's youth in a hyper-sexualized media, which is a whole other can of worms. But, thanks man.

OP.

I think I love you.

A++

Thank you doll

 

[johnsom]

wow zerg rush anyone else get the irony of the dream and series of posts following?I haven't even played sc2.

 

[Imbechile]

DAMN, beat me to it