I just watched my sister beat her daughter up in the front yard..

[Ieyke]

There isn't going to be any victory for you here. If you stay out, you'll feel guilty for doing nothing. If you try to talk to your sister, you'll get a shitstorm of "don't tell me how to raise my kid." If you call CPS, you'll feel like a coward for dumping the problem on someone else. If you broach the subject with your niece, she'll probably get angry and tell you it's none of your business.

Abuse means everyone loses. Resign yourself to feeling bad in some way. Then decide what you would like to feel bad for doing.

This guy has it EXACTLY right.

If you care about your niece there should be no way you just stay out of this.
Pick which thing you'd feel the least guilty for doing and do that.

If I had a sister and this was remotely in character for her I'd chew her the hell out all fire and brimstone style.

 

[Andy Shandy]

Im all for spankings but that seemed exessive it was over a fund raiser to get money for apple to cheer next year
Apple is 14 btw

Alright guys, be honest; who just imagined a montage of a giant Apple going through the first 18 years of her life? Being born ("Congratulations, its an Apple!"), rolling on its own for the first time, getting beaten up by her dad when she brings home a male banana, at graduation with one of those funny hats they wear in the US....

No, just me? Fine. You guys are no fun.

OT: Talk to Apple about it. See how she feels.

Actually, I thought of it being born as an iPod Shuffle and going through various forms of iDevices until she either turns into an iPad or a Mac when she's an adult.

"You did WHAT with that PC!? You better have used a USB Cable!"

 

[Saladfork]

I'm sorry but your niece's name is apple?

OP. Unless you think Apples life is at risk, I'd try to stay out of it if I was you.

yes her name really is apple

I'm sorry but your niece's name is apple?

OP. Unless you think Apples life is at risk, I'd try to stay out of it if I was you.

yeah I was gonna say...

.mabye that says somthing abotu the mother? (then again I know thats unfair judging)

yes she liked apples so she named her apple

...She didn't have a name until she was old enough to have a preference for food?

OT: I assume both you and your sister are reasonable adults. If you think it was excessive, tell her. It's up to her whether she decides to take your advice or not.

 

[DudeistBelieve]

I'm sorry but your niece's name is apple?

OP. Unless you think Apples life is at risk, I'd try to stay out of it if I was you.

yeah I was gonna say...

.mabye that says somthing abotu the mother? (then again I know thats unfair judging)

I have to say my first thought was the same as yours gentlemen.

I guess one bad Apple spoiled the bunch.

 

[Radeonx]

There isn't going to be any victory for you here. If you stay out, you'll feel guilty for doing nothing. If you try to talk to your sister, you'll get a shitstorm of "don't tell me how to raise my kid." If you call CPS, you'll feel like a coward for dumping the problem on someone else. If you broach the subject with your niece, she'll probably get angry and tell you it's none of your business.

Abuse means everyone loses. Resign yourself to feeling bad in some way. Then decide what you would like to feel bad for doing.

You're right, but here's my added two cents.
As someone who was physically and verbally abused throughout my childhood by a parent, I'm most definitely biased, but I think that you should do SOMETHING.
I'd probably say talk to your sister about it, and if patterns of this stuff continues, call CPS. Even if you ignore it, make sure to do something if this stuff continues.

 

[Darknacht]

I assume both you and your sister are reasonable adults. If you think it was excessive, tell her. It's up to her whether she decides to take your advice or not.

If his sister was a reasonable adult she would not be beating her kid and slamming the kids head into the door over some stupid fund raiser.
Spanking is one thing but this is way over the top call CPS thats what they are their for. Besides its not like they will take the kid if this is the first call the worst the would happen is your sister has to take some parenting classes which she probably needs.

***** slap your sister and slam her head into the door, when she asks 'wtf' be all 'what, i thought this was the way you punish people? you left the milk out'.

I suppose this is an option too just make sure that you tell her that if she calls the police you will tell them what she did.

 

[Sansha]

I'm sorry but your niece's name is apple?

OP. Unless you think Apples life is at risk, I'd try to stay out of it if I was you.

yes her name really is apple

I'm sorry but your niece's name is apple?

OP. Unless you think Apples life is at risk, I'd try to stay out of it if I was you.

yeah I was gonna say...

.mabye that says somthing abotu the mother? (then again I know thats unfair judging)

yes she liked apples so she named her apple

Your sister is damaged in the head.

But unless Apple is being physically abused and her safely is in danger, stay out of it. Go investigate, certainly, and please do intervene if you think you should. Personally given the situation, you should. Sooner rather than later so her injuries can still be used as evidence.
That and her goddamn name will convince CPS to remove her, if only temporarily.

Apple's well-being comes first, not yours or your sister's. Remember that.

 

[ThePenguinKnight]

"Stay out of it unless she's being physically abused" Isn't your head being slammed against a door and slapped around kind of, you know, physical? I'd at least tell her that she's overreacting.

 

[madster11]

***** slap your sister and slam her head into the door, when she asks 'wtf' be all 'what, i thought this was the way you punish people? you left the milk out'.

 

[soren7550]

CALL THE FREAKIN' POLICE!

 

[Revnak_v1legacy]

Do something. Your niece and sister need help, though the latter's help may involve a padded cell. Child abuse is not okay under any circumstances. Talk to your sister first. If it seems like she isn't going to seek any help about this herself, call child services.

 

[gyroscopeboy]

I'm sorry but your niece's name is apple?

OP. Unless you think Apples life is at risk, I'd try to stay out of it if I was you.

yes her name really is apple

I'm sorry but your niece's name is apple?

OP. Unless you think Apples life is at risk, I'd try to stay out of it if I was you.

yeah I was gonna say...

.mabye that says somthing abotu the mother? (then again I know thats unfair judging)

yes she liked apples so she named her apple

I'm going to catch shit for this but LMFAO. haha! *wipes away tears*

*Smacks self in the face and straightens tie and collar*
So have things calmed down now or is there still reason to be concerned?

Haha i'm with you bro.

It reminds me of Pablo Franciso..."she likes apples, it's gonna happen!"

 

[Quaidis]

You may be over-exaggerating everything. Unless Apple goes to school with a black eye and a concussion, I don't think the slap upside the head was all that harsh.

If you're concerned, go to your sister and ask her (in one version or another), "So this morning I saw you beating the absolute snot out of your kid. What on earth did she do?"


Should the answer your sister give not be satisfactory to the situation, further describe to your sister that anyone in the neighborhood could have seen that and that she should tone it down in the future. That you'd hate to see someone freak out and call the cops over something stupid.




The more you bend things out of proportion or sit on it dreading, the worse it's going to be for you. Confront the problem head on and don't act like it's huge, or you'll just end up freaking out your sister. Be mature on the matter, state your opinion.

Now obviously if Apple is sustaining injuries, or is getting her ass handed to her every day, you should call authorities on the matter and voice your concern to them. But for all you know Apple may have been a tramp (which kids at age 14 tend to be) and may have deserved it.

 

[Valkes]

My suggestion is to examine context as much as possible. Keep in mind, that kind of treatment is NEVER okay. However, you can't be of much help to anyone if you don't know what the situation is. Tell your sister how uncomfortable her actions made you feel. Convince her that no matter what the crime, there are better more productive punishments. If, as has been said, apple has been a bit of a tramp. . . Consider that a beating will only serve to alienate people who she's supposed to feel safe with. A better punishment might be something like a 20 page research paper on STD's, complete with sources. Oooor a visit to a maternal ward to see someone give birth ( not a pleasant experience ). Something that actually serves the purpose of punishment, is constructive, but does not make her feel unsafe with the very people she needs the most.

 

[chadachada123]

CPS all the way, if you confront your sister it'll be a huge argument about how you don't understands or you can't tell her how to raise her kid or something. Anonymous call to CPS and they'll do all the important checks and such and act appropriately. That could be parenting classes, support for your niece or full removal in extreme cases. Either way it's what's best for your niece that should come first.

she would know its me who called em no one was outside there and i was known by window

And? If she's abusing her kid, it's a moral imperative that you tell someone. Your sister should not be a parent (or at least, should be required to get some extensive retraining first), and you're enabling abuse by not acting.

Imagine if that head-smack would have broken a bone or something. Or left some bruises. Surely you've seen one of those movies with girls that are being abused by their boyfriends/husbands, and will just say "oh...I fell..."? It's kinda like that. It's exactly like that.

However, your sentence seems to be implying something else. Is the only reason you aren't telling the authorities because you don't want your sister to know that YOU were the one that made the call? If so, the most gentle way to say this is: grow a spine, man (woman? I haven't paid attention). You're letting some possible awkwardness get in the way of stopping abuse. That's horrid.

Edit: Actually, just watch this movie that my high school watched in Health class: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nne_Would_Tell

It's kinda like that.

 

[personaitor]

The slapping could be warranted. i can be ok with that, under certain circumstances. However, slamming her head against the door was crossing the line.

Get both of them into the same room, and confront them both of them about it. This is important: Be very stern, with both of them, but don't get angry. Don't yell, and don't escalate things. keep your voice low and calm. if either of them start yelling, just stop talking and observe. You could learn alot, but be ready to intervene if your sister takes a step in the wrong direction.
hear both sides of the story. ask many questions, but don't let the conversation heat up too much. If you think that slaps were warranted, great. whatever. However, after the main conversation, excuse Apple and tell your sister she stepped over the line. after you're done talking with your sister alone, warn her that if she crosses the line again, you will take further action.

It's what i would do, and i think its a reasonable thing to do.

On that slightly morbid note.... Cheers.

 

[Darknacht]

Was your niece being a brat?

If so, bitchslaps are wholly deserved. Kids these days could use a good ass-whooping every now and then. :/

I like how the people going "ZOMG CALL CPS" don't seem to realize that they could potentially ruin someone's life over something trivial.

Yep and if the cops want to beat the snot out of people for minor offenses than they should be allowed to do that, dumb ass adults could use a good ass-whooping every now and then too.