If you went to Gamer hell?

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Tharwen

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About 450ms of lag, so that you can just about play, but you totally fail at everything.
 

Schlagwerk

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My gamer hell involves every arcade DDR release in one room, and everyone always plays the song that is selected when the song select screen is first shown.

And I have no tokens.
 

TheTrojanBadger

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Forced to play UT3 free-for-all while you have no weapons and everyone else has Redeemers'.

SwimmingRock said:
No actual games. Just prepubescent kids screaming into your ear (not your earpiece, but ethereal voices lodged in your actual ear) about your sexual orientation, what they spent last night doing with your mum and accusing you of a long list of unfair behaviour. Kind of like MW2 without the gameplay. Actually, that might be an improvement.
Yep, that's gamer hell.
 

SecondmateFlint

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Nov 24, 2009
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Stuck in the world geometry. Every time you jump you keep telling yourself "I'm almost out! I'm almost out!" but inside you know...there is no escape...
 

baseracer

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Jul 31, 2009
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Gamer hell is where you play Harvest moon, but days go by even quicker.

All of your crops die because days only last 1 second.
 

rknight718

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May 3, 2009
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I've actually given this some thought as I've kinda taken Gaming as a religion anyway. Here's how I see it working:

In Gamer's Hell you must live thru EVERY game you've ever played for more than 5 minutes. Demos don't count. "Played" is defined as actually playing the game (i.e. moving the character, shooting, etc) therefore watching a 10 minute MGS intro wont count until you spend 5 mins sneaking around as Snake snapping necks (or Raiden, you get the picture).

You have all the abilities of the character you play in the game as well as all your memories from playing the game whilst you were alive. You are subject to all the rules within the game however you can perform normal abilities as you would in real life (i.e. jumping, leaning, crouching, etc.) You must successfully complete the game in order to progress to the next game. The games will be given to you in random order despite the order you may have played them in, however games in linear succession (ex. God of War 1 2 & 3) will be played from beginning to end. I've always imagined a "Wheel of Fortune" type device to determine the next game.

Games without real endings will require you to reach a certain point value (think Pacman, Galaga, Frogger, etc) before ending the game. Games with multiple characters or party members (ex. Final Fantasy) can act as they would in game or if you prefer, have the embodiment of a friend inhabit that body. This friend, if still alive, will experience the game with you as they dream. There is no time in Gamer's Hell, so several weeks in-game can pass in a single night to one of the living. You can have them stay or go as you please.

Completion of Gamer's Hell allows you to experience any game you choose whenever you like and can leave the game whenever as well. You can even have access to games not yet created at the time you died as there is no time in Gamer's Hell.

I know this doesn't sound too bad, but imagine having to not only play but LIVE thru games like Resident Evil, Fatal Frame or *shudder* Silent Hill. And it's EVERY game you've played. From PC to Console to Handheld. Scary huh?
 

The Warden

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Plumbers Don't Wear Ties.

OH GOD, IT'S SO TERRIBLE! STOP IT I BEG YOU PLEASE STOP IT NOOOOOOOO!
 

TheGameXXVII

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Feb 1, 2010
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every game available on Steam, but the computer has no space to play them.

they just sit there...waiting to be downloaded...only to never happen...
 

Zannah

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Jan 27, 2010
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rknight718 said:
I've actually given this some thought as I've kinda taken Gaming as a religion anyway. Here's how I see it working:

In Gamer's Hell you must live thru EVERY game you've ever played for more than 5 minutes. Demos don't count. "Played" is defined as actually playing the game (i.e. moving the character, shooting, etc) therefore watching a 10 minute MGS intro wont count until you spend 5 mins sneaking around as Snake snapping necks (or Raiden, you get the picture).

You have all the abilities of the character you play in the game as well as all your memories from playing the game whilst you were alive. You are subject to all the rules within the game however you can perform normal abilities as you would in real life (i.e. jumping, leaning, crouching, etc.) You must successfully complete the game in order to progress to the next game. The games will be given to you in random order despite the order you may have played them in, however games in linear succession (ex. God of War 1 2 & 3) will be played from beginning to end. I've always imagined a "Wheel of Fortune" type device to determine the next game.

Games without real endings will require you to reach a certain point value (think Pacman, Galaga, Frogger, etc) before ending the game. Games with multiple characters or party members (ex. Final Fantasy) can act as they would in game or if you prefer, have the embodiment of a friend inhabit that body. This friend, if still alive, will experience the game with you as they dream. There is no time in Gamer's Hell, so several weeks in-game can pass in a single night to one of the living. You can have them stay or go as you please.

Completion of Gamer's Hell allows you to experience any game you choose whenever you like and can leave the game whenever as well. You can even have access to games not yet created at the time you died as there is no time in Gamer's Hell.

I know this doesn't sound too bad, but imagine having to not only play but LIVE thru games like Resident Evil, Fatal Frame or *shudder* Silent Hill. And it's EVERY game you've played. From PC to Console to Handheld. Scary huh?
I could actually very well live with that (no pun intended). Would get a bit trickier with the aforementioned lack of abilities e.g. being just who I am right now, but even then, not really hell.
 

Strategia

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Heritage of Kings. Heritage of fucking Kings. God that game sucked on so many levels it's just not funny anymore.
 

SwimmingRock

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Nov 11, 2009
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rknight718 said:
Actually, that doesn't sound all that terrible. Sure, Ninja Gaiden 2 would be horrifying, but getting to be Shepard in Mass Effect? Sign me up. Also, since Hell means you're already dead, you would logically get infitinte continues. And if time doesn't exist, you will eventually finish all those games and then you can play whatever you want, which sounds more like Heaven. I think you've invented gamer Purgatory.
 

lonercs

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Jun 6, 2008
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Atcully gamer hell takes place on earth. Your punishment, you are forced to be the Jack Thompson/M.A. of the next generation.

That's Hell is being the reincarnation of all gamers worst enemy. Was it worth being a fanboy?
 

rknight718

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May 3, 2009
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SwimmingRock said:
rknight718 said:
Actually, that doesn't sound all that terrible. Sure, Ninja Gaiden 2 would be horrifying, but getting to be Shepard in Mass Effect? Sign me up. Also, since Hell means you're already dead, you would logically get infitinte continues. And if time doesn't exist, you will eventually finish all those games and then you can play whatever you want, which sounds more like Heaven. I think you've invented gamer Purgatory.
OMG I think you're right. I've always seen it as Hell because of Silent Hill. Yes, you are dead so technically you have infinite continues and whatnot, but if you cant get thru the game for whatever reason, you're stuck there until you do. And I don't know about the rest of you but I've played a LOT of games. Just sit and think for a minute.
 

troth

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Jun 8, 2009
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My gamer hell would be filled with gamer fuel but no bathroom, red rings, laggy games, and Micheal Atkinson/ Jack Thompson following me around.
 

open trap

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Feb 26, 2009
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Halo 3 with a bunch of whiney kids thatare impossible to make shut up kuz they get into your head and you cant turn the game off. Or worse having to play Brutal Legend but instead of fighting for metal im fighting for Rap or hip hop