If you were your username

[Dr. MooCow]

Well I imagine I would be a Doctor.
Who also happens to be a Minotaur, so my patients would have to traverse my labyrinth in order to get medical help.

 

[The Atomic Irishman]

If i were named, my name. You'd all have vicious cancer, or horrible mutations, or the most likely one, Dead.

 

[DerangedBeing]

I'd be that person you don't really have the rights to arest until I break a crime, but most likely to be a top suspect, as well as most likely to frighten people... I'm some what Twisted.... I think the Joker and I have a lot in common... it's fun to scare you humans... Muhaha...

 

[A Random Reader]

I would be the worlds best bookworm!

 

[twcblaze]

well, if I was really named my username, it'd be exactly what happens in online gaming:
"how the hell do you say that?"
"it's an acronym, so T W C Blaze."
"okay, I've been calling you twix for like 30 minutes... btw, about that blaze thing, are you a stoner."
"no, no I am not."
"don't lie"
"no, really, I'm just a pyro."

 

[A big red rooster]

I can only imagine all the jokes about my genitalia

 

[meatsplash]

I suppose I'd be "The Jigsaw-Killer" messy; a personification of what happens when meat is exploded and splashes everywhere onto its environment. People would probably avoid me, buzzards on the other hand...

 

[Vrex360]

I'd be a dinosaur name that was mispelled.

 

[Alex the Pally]

I'd be a Paladin named Alex, with all the benefits that it would suggest. Alternately, a guy named Alex who's one hell of a good friend to all. Most likely the first one.

EDIT: Woot. Post 100. Yay me.

 

[meatsplash]

@ Dr. MooCow (Because I've still never really understood how to reply to comment I'm aiming for... explain if you feel like clearing that up for me. Moving on):

Can you promise the most state-of-the-art health care to those patients who actually reach you via the labyrinth? Or are you just another greedy physician that wants to run extra tests that I don't need? Honestly, the whole "minotaur in a labyrinth" thing sounds a bit gimmicky. This needs to be addressed before you'll be seeing me for a check-up, sir.

 

[zehydra]

Most of the time online I've seen my name (Zehydra), as Zeh.

 

[101194]

I would have hacked the planet, And have the most money and power, And you would all be my slaves.

 

[the1ultimate]

Well, being my username certainly would have won me a lot of those playground arguments in primary school.

"I'm the best"
"First is the Worst, so I'm the best!"
"Well I am the one ultimate. It's my name."

Plus it would be... interesting at least to see what peoples' reactions were.

 

[Citrus]

I'd be a fruit drink.

 

[Skaramine]

I'd be scaring the piss out of gangsters and terrorists as a hideously scarred disguise expert with the strength of a madman.

And loving it!

 

[Offworlder_v1legacy]

Peole would keep asking me what planet I'm from and I would just tell them "Oh just a little place in the Zorionic System."

 

[Roganwilson]

I would be exactly the same as I am now, just without my current last name. I am not very imaginative when it comes to usernames.

 

[Vern]

People would call me Vern. Which wouldn't be that different. Huh.

 

[Tempest Fennac]

I'd be a fennec fox who could control the weather.