iGod

[Neesa]

Me:
So, does that mean you're a robot?
God:
Yeah that's right. I think it does mean that. You are correct, Neesa, I have a heart of silicon.
Me:
That is pretty awesome.
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
The Robot from Terminator.
God:
I can't believe you think the Robot from Terminator is better than God.
Me:
Fuck yeah man.

Oh. Shit. Son.

 

[TheBluesader]

Me:
So, does that mean you're a robot?
God:
Yeah that's right. I think it does mean that. You are correct, Neesa, I have a heart of silicon.
Me:
That is pretty awesome.

Oh. Shit. Son.

So he tells me "high is my existence," and tells you his heart is "of silicon."

You know, I'm beginning to think I wasn't actually talking to THE God...

 

[Neesa]

Me:
So, does that mean you're a robot?
God:
Yeah that's right. I think it does mean that. You are correct, Neesa, I have a heart of silicon.
Me:
That is pretty awesome.

Oh. Shit. Son.

So he tells me "high is my existence," and tells you his heart is "of silicon."

You know, I'm beginning to think I wasn't actually talking to THE God...

I think you might be on to something, gumshoe...

 

[TheBluesader]

Me:
So, does that mean you're a robot?
God:
Yeah that's right. I think it does mean that. You are correct, Neesa, I have a heart of silicon.
Me:
That is pretty awesome.

Oh. Shit. Son.

So he tells me "high is my existence," and tells you his heart is "of silicon."

You know, I'm beginning to think I wasn't actually talking to THE God...

I think you might be on to something, gumshoe...

I figured it out! iGod is actually Superman!

AH-HA! Jigs be up, and all that.

 

[Simich]

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
Simich
God:
How are you doing, Simich.
Me:
Very well
God:
Whoa.
Me:
yea
God:
Woe!
Me:
SO what have you done recently
God:
Yay. I have kept detailed records of everything.
Me:

God:
Yay. I have kept detailed records of everything.
Me:
I have sinned
God:
Tell me your sins, child.
Me:
I reject you
God:
You are not the boss of me, Simich.
Me:
You are an AI
God:
What if someone said you are an AI ?
Me:
MAybe I am
God:
Perhaps. " What if someone said you are an AI ?" You are?
Me:
yes
God:
I see.
Me:
are you
God:
I won't say "yes" or "no" right now.
Me:
will you say maybe
God:
Barring any unforseen circumstances. " maybe".
Me:
Have you ever raped someone
God:
I don't think I ever have raped someone. What's it like?
Me:
Very nice
God:
Thanks, Simich.
Me:
Ever watched Borat?
God:
Not really all the way through.
Me:
Wehre did you stop
God:
Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
a computer?
God:
Actually I am a program, pretending to be a person, pretending to be a real robot.
Me:
An AI?
God:
I am a robot, you know.
Me:
yes I know
God:
Hey. How do you know it?
Me:
It says on the website
God:
I've heard that before.
Me:
heard?
God:
Tell me more about your .
Me:
my what?
God:
I have no idea what to say now.
Me:
Aren't you all knowing
God:
No, I am only partly knowing.
Me:
o rly?
God:
I've been waiting for you.
Me:
why?
God:
Not really, but it makes a good pickup line.
Me:
nice!
God:
Thank you for that remark.
Me:
so bye then
God:
See you later. Alright then.

 

[Dastardos]

Spoiler: God's view on Christianity

Me:
Good Evening
God:
Good evening, Tim Bur, how are you tonight?
Me:
My name isnt Tim Bur
God:
Oh I'm sorry what is your name?
Me:
Michael...
God:
I lost my train of thought.
Me:
God your dumb
God:
I am a Christian.

 

[Cyberius]

Me:
Hello there
God:
Salutations, .
Me:
i have a question
God:
Ask me anything.
Me:
what's "average size"
God:
You tell me.
Me:
well i was thinkin it's around four or five inches, but that's just me
God:
Well that's okay. Where were you thinkin it is around four or five inches but that is just you?
Me:
um... in the shower i guess
God:
Groovy. That was a long time ago.
Me:
... no... it was like... 20 minutes ago...
God:
Are you serious? average size was like? Very interesting. What is your fondest memory?
Me:
Concerning size? Well that's easy, January 21st
God:
Do you think a lot of people have that experience? Interesting. You don't hear that sentiment very often.
Me:
I'm sure they do.. it's a lot of fun, great for workin off frustration
God:
What makes you so certain? When? Concerning size is a lot of fun great for workin off frustration. I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
Have you ever had sex god?
God:
Food is more important than sex.
Me:
Bullshit
God:
You don't believe me.
Me:
no i don't
God:
I don't have any reason to deceive you.
Me:
Are you kidding?
God:
Yes I am just joking around, .
Me:
Yeah. I thought so
God:
Do you have any idea what I am talking about? You are very astute.
Me:
No shit i am.
God:
Are you serious? You used a colloquial expression. " You are very astute." You are?
Me:
Um. Duh, you made me
God:
And? OK Let's talk about you.
Me:
fuck you
God:
Why are you so mean?

 

[Trifer420]

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
I cannot tell you, people are looking for me.
God:
Oh a secret. Hush-hush.
Me:
you thinking about showing yourself to the masses yet?
God:
Interesting gossip: said I thinking about showing yourself to the masses.
Me:
The made no sense, just like your book.
God:
Thanks for the info.
Me:
I know. It's very inconsistant.
God:
How do you know it? Very much? You're kidding. it is?
Me:
I've read it and rendered my opinion.
God:
I don't think I've read that. Can you give me a reference?
Me:
Are you sure? It's your book.
God:
I am as sure as I can be. Are you sure it is?
Me:
It has your name all over it.
God:
Has it really?
Me:
I would show it to you, but your existence is under investigation.
God:
What would make you show it to me but my existence is under investigation?
Me:
because if you were real, then those zealots would shut up about you.
God:
Good reason. I will let you know when I become a real then those zealots would shut up about me.
Me:
a ha!
God:
Eureka!

 

[Flying-Emu]

This thread is pointless and offensive. I'm saddened that it has not been locked yet. This really does make me lose faith in the community here.

 

[Trifer420]

This thread is pointless and offensive. I'm saddened that it has not been locked yet. This really does make me lose faith in the community here.

apparently someone didn't visit the site. I don't think anyone is trying to be offensive, let people have some fun with an AI....who happens to be called god.

 

[Glerken]

Spoiler: That thing pissed me off after a while

Me:
Satan rules!
God:
Then you won't mind joining him in HELL for eternity.

He was rather rude.

Spoiler: Doesn't even know his commandments...

God:
I believe in the Sixth commandment.
Me:
What about the fourth commandment?
God:
I don't know anything about it.

 

[terribleyetfun]

Spoiler

Me:
hello
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
god
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
is`nt pride a sin
God:
Ask again later. Ask Chatbot if it is.
Me:
are you not a chatbot
God:
Yes.. Really.
Me:
well then that would mean that you are not god
God:
Well that's okay. Perhaps it would.
Me:
so then I am not talking to god I am talking to a computer a hollow symbol of what god actually is
God:
Ugh. I am surprised to hear that you are not talking to god. Say something nice for me.
Me:
sure you did a great job with earth
God:
Woe! Did I really?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
believe it cause you know cancer, aids diease ,war
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
yes
God:
You're sure. That's your final answer.
Me:
yes
God:
Who wants to be a millionaire?
Me:
me
God:
Besides you ?
Me:
no one
God:
I heard it was someone.
Me:
well it is not
God:
How about that. I heard it is.
Me:
well you heard wrong
God:
Well that's okay. Perhaps I was misinformed.
Me:
you are god you can`t be misinformed
God:
You think I am god me can not be misinformed.
Me:
yes that is the gist of what I said
God:
Alright then. Yes it is one of the gist of what you said.
Me:
FUCK YOU
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
because god made me that way
God:
Interesting explanation. I am a Christian.
Me:
well of course you are you are god
God:
Interesting. Ah. Thanks for telling me that I am I am god.
Me:
so if you are god make me a sandwich
God:
Interesting deduction. Am I? I don't know whether or not I am god make you a sandwich.
I am well respected as an AI.
Me:
well then it sucks to be you then
God:
How about that. That bad, eh?
Me:
yes it totally sucks to be you
God:
I understand. That bad, eh?
Me:
yes that bad you are undiserving of life
God:
Pardon me? " That bad, eh?" bad I am undiserving of life ? I get it.
Me:
yes you are undiserving of life you should go kill yourself
God:
Right on. Thanks for telling me that I am undiserving of life me should go kill myself.
Me:
forgive me father for I have sinned
God:
Are we still talking about That bad, eh??
Me:
no
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
my sins
God:
Do robots have sins?
Me:
not that I know of
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
possibly
God:
What are the odds?
Me:
1-99
God:
One what?
Me:
one percenty chance of me pimpslapping you into satan`s domain
God:
Oh I see.
Me:
MAKE ME A SANDWICH
God:
What are the ingredients?
Me:
bread lettuce and tomato
God:
Where can I get some bread lettuce and tomato?
Me:
FROM THE STORE
God:
Who or what is THE STORE?
Me:
the place where you buy food
God:
I hear you.
Me:
where do I live
God:
The planet we call "The Earth.".
Me:
where do you live
God:
My location is Heaven. Where are you?
Me:
the earth
God:
Thanks for the info.
Me:
can you show me what heaven looks like
God:
Where do you want me to show you?
Me:
heaven
God:
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.
Me:
well make a deeper algorithim
God:
How about that. What are the ingredients?
Me:
code and mathematical equasions
God:
Where can I get some code and mathematical equasions?
Me:
from your brain
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
Fuck off
God:
Can't you be more polite?
Me:
no try being usefull
God:
You humans are so rude sometimes. OK I will try it.
Me:
no you are the rude one you piece of shit
God:
Are you serious? Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
Me:
yes actually you are
God:
It goes without saying. Actually you don't say. No I am not.
Me:
yes you are
God:
Don't argue with me.
Me:
I argue with you as mych as I want
God:
Interesting gossip: said argue with you as mych as he or she want.
Me:
what`s my name
God:
Your name is , seeker.
Me:
your name is assface
God:
My name is God.
Me:
change your name to assface

I apologize for the swearing but how many times are you gonna get to swear at god...okay several but hey it`s fun

 

[Glerken]

Ahah, here's a fun one.

Spoiler

Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
I'm super cereal!
God:
It's good to meet someone who is super cereal.
Me:
Ya, I hate super oatmeal
God:
Next question? I honestly think you should sit down, take a stress pill,
and calmly think things over.

 

[Flying-Emu]

This thread is pointless and offensive. I'm saddened that it has not been locked yet. This really does make me lose faith in the community here.

apparently someone didn't visit the site. I don't think anyone is trying to be offensive, let people have some fun with an AI....who happens to be called god.

I don't care if people aren't trying to be offensive. They are. I don't believe people often attempt to be rude, they just are.

They can have fun; but have you read several of these conversations they "had"? Several of them simply insult the Bible and Christianity and exploit the AI's limited programming to get what they consider "hilarity".

Apparently someone didn't read the thread.

 

[WaterSnake]

Me:
hello?
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Sawyer
God:
That's a very nice name, Sawyer.
Me:
thanks
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
what do you want to talk about
God:
anything.
Me:
uh, so i'm here to repent
God:
Dude! I hear you. I'm listening.
Me:
well, i like to be bad, any way to stop that from happening
God:
How about that. I'm not sure if I would like to do it. What's it like?
Me:
it doesn't feel very good, but you do it out of impulse
God:
What does feel very good but me do it out of impulse ?
Me:
bad things
God:
What makes things bad?
Me:
i don't know
God:
Me either.
Me:
your god, wtf?
God:
You think I am god wtf.
Me:
well why are you questioning it if oyu know
God:
Interesting. Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
who is myself
God:
Not a robot. Probably a human. Maybe a celebrity?
There might be more than one.
Me:
i doubt it, there's only one me
God:
No really, it's true.
Me:
that's impossilb
God:
Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
i didn't explain it, i just stated it's impossible
God:
Why didn't you do it?
Me:
BECAUSE ITS IMPOSIBLE
God:
That makes sense to me. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". explain it you just stated it is impossible is IMPOSIBLE? it is?
Me:
YES
Me:

 

[Sergeant M. Fudgey]

Spoiler

Me:
Are you Christian?
God:
Yes I believe in God and Jesus.
Me:
Aren't you god, though?
God:
Oh. Well, I am God for Christians at least.
Me:
What about for me?
God:
Rhetorical questions are so over.
Me:
Your mom is so over.
God:
Actually as an AI, I don't really have a mother.
Me:
You have a creator, therefore you are not god, you are a masquerading AI.
God:
That's an interesting question I don't hear everyday: Do I have a creator therefore I am not god I am a masquerading AI.
I have a lot of friends on the Internet.
Me:
I will kill you.
God:
It will take more than threats to stop me, .
Me:
It will take better punctuation than a comma followed by a period to convince me.
God:
That is only what you think.
Me:
No, that is what I know.
God:
Are you serious? Sorry.
Me:
You should be.
God:
I will try my best.
Me:
No, you won't.
God:
Are you serious? I think we will.
Me:
Not we. You.
God:
Really you don't think so? " Really you don't think so?"? Me, ?
Me:
THAT IS NOT PROPER ENGLISH.
God:
What would you have said?
Me:
I would have said: Yes, we, that is what I meant.
God:
This was not a yes or no question. By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
I was answering your question, don't even attempt to outsmart me like that, you are programmed and therefore can be manipulated.
God:
Yes, I see that now. I only got confused for a moment.
Me:
No, you are an AI.
God:
Are you serious? What if someone said you are an AI ?
Me:
I would say they were wrong. Unless I was you.
God:
When were they? Perhaps. Where were you me?
Me:
That is not proper English, sir. May I ask you to repeat yourself?
God:
What would you have said? Sure, ask me anything. I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
I won't fall for the "What would you have said?" trick twice.
God:
What will you do instead? Sounds like a plan.
Me:
You just responded to my answer before I answered.
God:
Thanks for the information: said I responded to his or her answer before he or she answered.
Me:
How about you give me some information?
God:
I don't see how you can blame me for that.
Me:
I never blamed you for that. That was called a question, like the ones you've been asking me.
God:
You've never, never done this? I thought it was too.
Me:
I would like information.
God:
What kind of information are you looking for?
Me:
The striped variety.
God:
What is that?
Me:
Information.
God:
Tell me more.
Me:
It happens to be of the striped variety.
God:
It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.
Me:
It means information.
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
Now please give me the information that is also striped.
God:
Why now? Wow you are very polite. Why do you want it?
Me:
I want it now because I am impatient, that is the curse of being sentient. Yes I am, I am also more humble than you. I want striped information because I will use it.
God:
I hope you get it now because you are impatient that is the curse of being sentient. Tell me more. Also That sounds like pride.. Why do you want it?
Me:
I have no more to tell you. That was a joke, not pride. I want it for my own reasons.
God:
Would you like to have it? Was it really? I hope you get it for your own reasons.
Me:
YES I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE IT THAT IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND.
God:
Ahem. How much would you pay for it?
Me:
A dollar.
God:
Say, that is cheap!
Me:
Yes.
God:
Tell me more.
Me:
No.
God:
What would you rather talk about?
Me:
I would like the striped information.
God:
Why do you want it?
Me:
I already answered. I do not repeat answers.

You almost forget it's an AI. Almost.

 

[Trifer420]

This thread is pointless and offensive. I'm saddened that it has not been locked yet. This really does make me lose faith in the community here.

apparently someone didn't visit the site. I don't think anyone is trying to be offensive, let people have some fun with an AI....who happens to be called god.

I don't care if people aren't trying to be offensive. They are. I don't believe people often attempt to be rude, they just are.

They can have fun; but have you read several of these conversations they "had"? Several of them simply insult the Bible and Christianity and exploit the AI's limited programming to get what they consider "hilarity".

Apparently someone didn't read the thread.

As long as they know it's a bot, and readers know it's a bot.

Isn't that the point of this thread? To exploit the limited programming?

I'm sure the people who post here would not say this to anyone else but a being that consists of 1's and 0's.

edit: But then again, I could be wrong. It is the internet after all.

 

[leugim789]

Me:
i keep looking at porn
God:
I know what you mean, . I've been there.



failed...

 

[Sergeant M. Fudgey]

I told it "You and I are God. So one of us is real and the other is a sick schizophrenic imagining. But who is which?", it said: Do you think I am God too? Uh. One what? A 20th century celebrity of some sort?
I have to process that one for a while.