I'm a fairly conservative guy, but I am still flabergasted by people who think gay is a choice

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comadorcrack

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Mar 19, 2009
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D Moness said:
So you have to behave like a "normal" straight male , or "normal" straight female so that other less open minded people might accept you.
Trying to act something else you are not is lying to yourself.
Not at all what I was getting at. I mean that being Gay or straight shouldn't define you as a human being. You should judge people for what they do.

I'll elaborate. I know Gay people, they're plenty fine people to be around who are good fun... however then you get to the "!!!GAY!!!" People... who are to fucking obnoxious about being gay its untrue (Like Alan Carr). Its no different from the douche-baggy over Heterosexual guys you get (like my brother).

Let me quote Batman Begins "Its not who we are on the insides, but our actions that define us".
 

Woodsey

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Hosker said:
It's still not proven why some people are gay (I don't think); any theory could be correct.
Basic logic can tell you that it being a choice is not correct.

Why would anyone choose to be gay? You're persecuted by morons, treated unequally by law, can't have kids (and probably struggle to adopt versus a straight couple), etc.

The MuthR FuthR said:
homosexuality is an addiction to sex with the same gender.
finding that you are gay, and that you were born that way, and that you cant change it, is admition to being addicted to sex with your fellow gender members...

my litle theory here, is undeniable, and cant be disproved!

its sex addiction, just like a repeat sex offender that cant help themselves...
This is a joke, right?

Being gay is not all about shagging other guys/girls.
 

ReservoirAngel

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The MuthR FuthR said:
ReservoirAngel said:
The MuthR FuthR said:
If homosexuality is a sex addiction, then explain gay people who are attracted to people but have no desire for sex
[in a tired, and somewhat depressed sounding voice]

they are atracted to people, they wana have sex with those people, they are horny...
shut the fuck up, your not gay...
actually i am gay, so...yeah

and i'm just pointing out that not every gay guy's life revolves around sex. yes, they get horny, as EVERYONE does, but some of them that I know, and obviously many others all over the world, just aren't interested in sex.
 

RPGPlayer83

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Cursed Frogurt said:
Hence why I'm only fiscally conservative. Let people do what they want. I'm pro choice and pro gay marriage; if you think abortion is wrong... don't get an abortion yourself. At the same time, I'm REALLY against big government and higher taxes. If someone isn't responsible with their money (the gov't), giving them more money won't help.
I want to have your babies. That's EXACTLY what I was going to say. I'm a "crazy" libertarian. I don't care what people are doing if it doesn't involve my pocketbook, really (I wrote an essay [http://www.oppapers.com] on this).

The argument most reasonable Christians (or whoever) have is that gay people were molested and it made them gay. To me, this isn't a logical argument, but I can see where the Christians (or whoever) are coming from. They have to somehow make their strict version of religion work with their personality.
The best Facebook status [http://www.postrandomonium.com]. I guarantee it.
 

D Moness

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comadorcrack said:
Not at all what I was getting at. I mean that being Gay or straight shouldn't define you as a human being. You should judge people for what they do.

I'll elaborate. I know Gay people, they're plenty fine people to be around who are good fun... however then you get to the "!!!GAY!!!" People... who are to fucking obnoxious about being gay its untrue (Like Alan Carr). Its no different from the douche-baggy over Heterosexual guys you get (like my brother).

Let me quote Batman Begins "Its not who we are on the insides, but our actions that define us".
Then i misunderstood you. I will apologize for that.
 

4173

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Oct 30, 2010
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bdcjacko said:
The MuthR FuthR said:
bdcjacko said:
I have had a few friends that are gay or transgendered or both and had talks with them about the human condition and such. And so I convinced gay is not a choice.

I bring this up because my girlfriend just told me she is in a debate with a work friend who still thinks it is a choice. How could it be a choice? I mean logically being gay doesn't make sense. I mean on the down side you are degraded, belittled, and repressed by society. You are stigmatized and grudgingly accepted in most place that don't specifically cater to homosexuals. None of that sounds fun, but on the other down side you can take it in the butt and not get married.

The only real plus side I can see is that you can dress how ever you want, and if someone says you look gay, you can reply, "I know, isn't it great?"

Anyhow, what are your feelings on this?
people like you shouldnt think or comunicate about homosexuality...
you have been mislead by young people!
most homosexuals are dillusional, and claim that they have no choice,
but the reality is, that there are choices, everything is a choice!

people COULD say, that being addicted to cocaine is a choice, but its not;
trying it is a choice, liking it is 'a' choice, deciding that you wana do something forever, is in fact a choice.
theres a majority of homosexuals that are believing lies, that are spoken within the confines of thier own minds...
Gay people are just uh... fuck it... I dont know how to add a terminology to it, but I believe ive worded it properly!
Being addicted to cocaine is a choice, you have to first start doing cocaine. Gays are attracted to their own gender before having sex.
Whether or not one becomes exposed to the risk of cocaine addiction is a choice, but the potential for addiction is not.
 

astrav1

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I think it matters what one defines gay as. It could be a choice. If we are talking pure sexual attraction to the same sex, then it is not a choice for the most part.
 

Simskiller

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Oct 13, 2010
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I can see gay as a choice as I can choose to be bisexual, as I'm currently bicurious.

As I read in another thread: Why can't it be both? Born gay and gay by choice?

Ironic Pirate said:
What's your favorite flavor of ice cream? If preferences are based solely on choices, make yourself hate it, if just for an hour. You can't, can you?
I can. I would have to eat it a shit ton for that hour though. Kind of like how I found out I learned peanut butter actually tastes really disgusting when I was like 7 when I decided to eat a whole tub of the stuff for lunch one day. Have not liked peanut butter since.
 

Valksy

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Nov 5, 2009
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Same shit..different day...

Been out and a part of the GLBTQ community for 18 years or so and have yet to meet a gay guy or lesbian who made a choice to be GLBTQ. It is possible to choose whether you do anything about it. I have the right equipment, biologically speaking I could have sex with a man. I have zero desire to do so and the idea is both rather gross and somewhat hilarious to me.

I knew I was a lesbian when I was still a virgin. I am still a lesbian even when I don't hook up. I knew that I liked women before I really even knew what sex was. My sexuality is innate - It might be a result of genetics, nothing so simple as a "gay gene" but rather a combination of factors. It might be due to an in utero event. But it is as much a part of me as the fact that I have blue eyes.

It would also be lovely if people would stop reducing homosexuality to just the sex act. My attraction to women is based on more than whether or not I think that I can get in to her knickers.
 

Iron Mal

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I personally think that it is possible that it could be a choice (even if it's a subconscious one shaped by a person's experiences and relationships).

Homosexuality isn't like disability, you can look at someone in a wheel chair and have a doctor inform you that it was the result of a birth defect, accident, disease or whatever. Trying the same with a doctor looking at someone and saying 'he has the gay gene' is somewhat...harder to believe, there are lots of alternative causes, no single one being universal (homosexuality is a deviation based in ones behavior and emotions, there are a vast number of possible psychological causes for that).

Some people have said, 'why would someone choose to be discriminated against?', has fear of punishment stopped other people from making choices we would view as stupid or lacking common sense?
 

Arsen

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ReservoirAngel said:
To everyone who's questioning if it's a choice:

When did you decide to be straight?
Well, being "straight" is default, the norm. Being homosexual, bisexual, or otherwise is "opposite approach" to sexuality.
 

Therumancer

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Nov 28, 2007
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bdcjacko said:
I have had a few friends that are gay or transgendered or both and had talks with them about the human condition and such. And so I convinced gay is not a choice.

I bring this up because my girlfriend just told me she is in a debate with a work friend who still thinks it is a choice. How could it be a choice? I mean logically being gay doesn't make sense. I mean on the down side you are degraded, belittled, and repressed by society. You are stigmatized and grudgingly accepted in most place that don't specifically cater to homosexuals. None of that sounds fun, but on the other down side you can take it in the butt and not get married.

The only real plus side I can see is that you can dress how ever you want, and if someone says you look gay, you can reply, "I know, isn't it great?"

Anyhow, what are your feelings on this?
I'm anti-gay men which I won't get into here, simply because i've debated it on these forums before and it's not going to do anything besides start an endless, irresolvable battle. What I think is probably still far back on the forums though if your really interested.

To speak neutrally however, your question has a clear answer:

To answer your question the whole "gay is a choice" thing is political, and comes from the gay rights movement itself. This arguement doesn't generally spring from the anti-gay community, though it is used (turned back on them) in the course of debate.

The basic issue is that if being gay is an inherant state of being, then it can be corrected. Thus out of an interest in not having homosexuality defined as something that can be corrected (a medical condition) the arguement about it being a lifestyle choice is made. In response to it being a choice, implying that someone can choose not to be gay, it's argued as being an intristic state of being. This is one of the reasons where my stance against homosexuality (for men, I won't go into my full opinion since it's irrelevent, but I believe gays and lesbians are seperate issues as opposed to something that should be addressed together. Just as there are specific "women's issues" that exist seperatly from those affecting men. Saying that the genders can be put together here is a political move when like a lot of things you wind up dealing with two fairly differant situations).

However, you ARE correct that being gay is not a lifestyle choice, as much as the gay rights movement fears it, we know it's a medical (not entirely psychological) condition. Simply put for people to have any kind of sexual arousal they need to transmit and receive chemical signals. This is why you can castrate people by removing parts of their sex organs. These chemicals interact with the brain (and we don't fully understand how the brain works) and ultimatly cause one's personality and drives to be built around what the body is telling it it's needs are.

Someone who is homosexual is reacting to the chemical signals of their own gender, basically their receptors are broken, and this influances the brain and how they think.

One important thing to remember is that while the body influances the brain, the same can happen in reverse. This is why psychlogical conditions (various kinds of insanity) can have profound physical effects in addition to behavioral ones. What's more everyone's DNA includes the information for both genders. One thing that you might remember from science classes is that in cases where a species is endangered animals have been recorded as undergoing gender reversal in order to reproduce and keep the species alive. This was used in "Juraasic Park" as one of the problems they faced, you might remember a pregnant dinosaur with the handlers going "OMG, how, they are all men" and then (at least in the books) a very strong "Nature finds a way" arguement about how it was foolish to think the population could be controlled. It's not common, but it does happen.

Also, as you might guess from the above, animals have also displayed homosexual behavior, but this is not surprising because a lot of the same diseases and medical conditions that afflict people also affect animals. If a human's sex receptors can respond to the wrong signals, so can those of animals.



The point of the above is actually that one of the reasons why psychology has been able to influance sexuality (causing the belief that it's a psychological problem) is that if you force enough trauma on someone to fire up deep survival insticts, the body and mind will adapt to whatever it needs to do to survive. It's not something that can be controlled, and results are uncommon (especially if you don't know what your doing exactly) but the same basic thing has caused split personalities and the like with people adapting to horrendous situations. This is why old school "torture psychology" did effectively treat homosexuality, but also can't reliably duplicate the results.

A more well known example of the same basic thing is hypnosis, brainwashing, and mental deprogramming. Simply put someone who understand how to influance the mind nowadays can totally alter who a person is, including their sexual orientation. Then again such people can also make other people think they are dogs. You see this demonstrated on a low-end scale in magic shows where a hypnotist will make guys from the audience do ridiculous things, but then have no memory of it. Techniques exist for doing that kind of thing permanantly.

The overall point here being that homosexuality is a medical condition, with actual physical causes (you can't have any kind of sex drive without the equipment, and unusual sex drives are it malfunctioning). Everybody pretty much knows this nowadays, but few people put the information together in their heads for political reasons, and "gay is a choice" is one of the arguements made to try and hold off any kind of massive societal resolution on the subject when it comes to dealing with gays. Like anyone who has their brain adapted to something, the feel there is nothing wroung with them, do not want to be cured, and are afraid that if the condition CAN be cured (which it can) people are going to force the treatment.

Given my initial statements, you can guess where I lean here. Typically though the gay arguements tend to revolve around people who point out the things I did wanting to chemically castrate them all or something, which is hardly the case.
 

sageoftruth

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WrongSprite said:
Hosker said:
It's still not proven why some people are gay (I don't think); any theory could be correct.
But...we know that it's not a choice. We don't know exactly why, but it's definitely not a choice.

Proof? Try asking one of them, most of the gay guys I know would far prefer to be straight, but they can't help fancying guys.
That and the fact that many of us, if given the choice, would not be gay regardless of what society thinks.
 

GodofCider

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Nov 16, 2010
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Why should I even remotely care as to how someone likes to engage in sexual activities and with whom?

So long as all parties involved are mature and consenting, then it's simply none of my business; nor do I care to hear about it.
 

Nimcha

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Therumancer said:
This is one of the reasons where my stance against homosexuality (for men, I won't go into my full opinion since it's irrelevent, but I believe gays and lesbians are seperate issues as opposed to something that should be addressed together. Just as there are specific "women's issues" that exist seperatly from those affecting men. Saying that the genders can be put together here is a political move when like a lot of things you wind up dealing with two fairly differant situations).
Phew, well at least I can sleep better tonight knowing you don't have any issues with lesbians. :D