I'm jealous.

[LightningBanks]

I'd say that the issue here is that you're afraid that your girlfriend would take the offer to go off with some other guy. If you've been together for nine months, I'm sure she doesn't want to leave you for another guy. Believe in yourself and her more.

Also, creating a fake Facebook is going a bit too far. It's okay to be a bit paranoid, but testing your girlfriend like that...I don't think she'd be very pleased if she found out.

You can't stop guys from hitting on her. You can however trust in that she will push them away. If you try to keep her to yourself, she will think you're possessive and clingy.

As for me, I get jealous all the time. But, having OCD, I know how to seal my bad thoughts away and try to not care about them. Doesn't stop me from getting paranoid, but I know enough about how silly my paranoia is that I don't act on it (most of the time).

Do you have any good ideas for sealing the thoughts? I generally get paranoid about other things like friendships alot, and when it happens I cant get out of it.

 

[Arkhangelsk]

I'd say that the issue here is that you're afraid that your girlfriend would take the offer to go off with some other guy. If you've been together for nine months, I'm sure she doesn't want to leave you for another guy. Believe in yourself and her more.

Also, creating a fake Facebook is going a bit too far. It's okay to be a bit paranoid, but testing your girlfriend like that...I don't think she'd be very pleased if she found out.

You can't stop guys from hitting on her. You can however trust in that she will push them away. If you try to keep her to yourself, she will think you're possessive and clingy.

As for me, I get jealous all the time. But, having OCD, I know how to seal my bad thoughts away and try to not care about them. Doesn't stop me from getting paranoid, but I know enough about how silly my paranoia is that I don't act on it (most of the time).

Do you have any good ideas for sealing the thoughts? I generally get paranoid about other things like friendships alot, and when it happens I cant get out of it.

I'm not one to go to for advice. Even though I can get away some of the thoughts, I'm still a very unstable person. I can break like a twig easily. But I'd say make more friends. Having few friends is good, but it makes you more easily paranoid (at least I am) about them specifically. More people to be with eases the paranoia a bit. Having few people to trust makes it hard to stay sane if you question the reality of it. As for trusting them at all, try to think outside your own perspective as much as possible.

As for actually ignoring the thoughts, I occupy myself with hobbies. I play guitar, I practice singing, I play games, and so on. And if my OCD is really inconsolable, I listen to this [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=StPL8_vMpfA] album on full blast. Then again, I'm a raving mad metalhead, so it may not work for everyone.

 

[370999]

The facebook thing was creepy as hell. Anyway she should go out and boys will probaly try to chat her up. I mean unless she has a ring on how am I meant to know? But it takes two to tango, she has to be game for something to happen. Your facebook thing should of proved she's not so just be happy.

If you do get jealous, I understand, I'm literally like one of the most pssesive people on earth, however just try and be aware of it and censor it out as you talk. You won't get all of it but everyone is flawed and she is free to pick up and leave.

 

[BENZOOKA]

Don't be so overly jealous, owning, paranoid and pathetic.

The truth is, in a relationship you can only trust that she will not cheat or leave you. That's just the way it is. There's nothing you can do about it. Obsessively jealous behavior in the other hand is a good long-way term to drive her away.

Relationships are about trust, not owning your partner like an object.

This. Wait, I can't just say 'this' or I'll get in trouble. Um....this quote is 100% correct!

You sir, are in big troub... Never mind.

 

[huh-radio]

I'm never worried when my missus goes out to town or when I'm at work. I just don't feel that threatened about other guys. She has openly told me about a few occasions when other dudes have attempted to hit on her. I also know most of her male friends, not to keep tabs on them, but 'cos they're all nice guys. There's this one friend of hers, a bit of a big guy. I know it's a nasty stereotype, but the dude looks like a really hc geek, you know what I'm saying? Still, he's nice enough to be a friend of mine. I learned once from my woman that he had attempted to hit on her once. Not too openly, but kinda really craving for attention, doing the whole "I'm a lonely guy and you're my best friend" routine. After telling me this, she asked me if I was jealous. I shrugged my shoulders and asked her if I should. She wouldn't reply, so I just told her it's water under the bridge, no harm no foul. And my woman just hates that about me. She just wants me to be overly protective and a little jealous sometimes. I guess she'd think it to be cute or something.

And the reason I can do this? Act all secure and shit? 'Cos deep down I know two very important things. First, I can always count on the missus to not do anything wrong or stupid (relationship-wise), and second, I could break all of her male friends like twigs if it ever came down to that. Okay, so the big guy might put up a fight, but her friends aren't exactly strong or anything.

So, uhh, I dunno, try weight-lifting or something? The better and healthier your ego, the easier it is to trust others. Also, stop taking things so seriously. It she cheats on you, then that's that. But acting like that can actually be the catalyst for this sorta behaviour. Just chill out and enjoy the love of yer companion while it lasts. I know it sounds really cold but it really isn't.

well said-now i don't have to bother!

 

[DatCracker]

Jealousy should be felt, but never expressed.

Sure, I can be a jealous asshole at times, but I never ever let it show.

Creating a fake facebook profile to e-stalk your chick..... That's fucked up.

Just swallow your jealousy, dude.

 

[Karhukonna]

Once we were out just as usual, lil dancing and stuff, when her pathetic ex comes over and grabs her ass.
Well one of my mates instantly broke his nose, but still, what am I supposed to do? Talk about that?

That's why I trust HER, but I dont fucking trust other guys. She can't do anything about it when someone suddenly tries to "touch" her, still it's making me insane.

Luckily this only happened once.

You gotta show them buggers that she's your woman now. Someone goes around doing shit like that to your bunkmate, you gotta let 'em know you're gonna break 'em if they do that again. Other dudes ain't gonna respect you, and they're gonna feel that they're above you. I don't know if this is the case or not, but in all honesty it doesn't matter where you stand compared to the other guys. You just haven't achieved this sort of alpha male state of mind regarding your woman.

And if you don't man up soon, your lady's gonna feel like you're a loser wimp, and just dump you for it. Sure, you gotta offer love and warmth to a woman, but they also need you to act at least a little territorial, like the animal they think you are. *sexy wink*

And just to clarify, acting like a neanderthal isn't really gonna solve anything, either. Most times, you can just talk you way out of these situations. Keep in mind though, that if you just ***** about it like a little runt, "you leave my ladyfriend lone, mister, or I'll call you names", it'll just make people laugh. It's gotta be with a firm tone. Can't really fake that, which brings me back to that alpha male state of mind. An animalistic territorial instict regarding yer missus will certainly ward off any would-be girlfriend snatchers. Being insecure isn't the way to go.

However, by territorial animal instinct, I do not mean facebook-stalking. I mean having a protective presence, even when you're not around.

 

[ovset]

Christ, you're pathetic and clingy. Women interpret jealousy as insecurity and thus is a huge turnoff for them.

Cut it out or it's going to end badly.

 

[ethaninja]

Please explain to me why I should care?

Because you dont have to post or look here.

Anyways id say OP should take it easy, its rather unfair that you question her trust and faith to you, when she appears to be faithful.

Oh, come now. I have seen you post on many "relationship threads" stating that you "don't care" and that "people need to stop making relationship threads." You are not one to talk, sir.

Please explain to me why I should care?

Chill dude, why so hostile?

I'm not hostile. I merely posed the question as to why I should care about the relationship predicaments of a person I neither know, nor will ever see.

Well, then why post at all if you don't care? Surely people who don't care would just ignore the thread.

 

[Hanzo Hattori]

Well thanks for all the advises (most of them were useful ), I think there's no longer need to post in this thread, since there aren't gonna any different statements anymore